1
00:02:39,439 --> 00:02:41,685
Sue, no, no, no!
2
00:02:41,814 --> 00:02:44,227
Kill yourself on your own time.
3
00:03:20,797 --> 00:03:23,169
According to the Art of War by Sun Tzu,
4
00:03:23,397 --> 00:03:26,435
every battle is won and lost before it is fought.
5
00:03:26,564 --> 00:03:28,519
Well, then I guess you've already lost.
6
00:03:31,897 --> 00:03:35,185
Oh, that's not very sportsmanlike.
Let's fucking go!
7
00:04:01,314 --> 00:04:04,144
Ladies.
Hi again.
8
00:04:04,172 --> 00:04:06,002
Ok, this is the third time we've been out here.
9
00:04:05,931 --> 00:04:06,720
I know.
10
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:07,620
We're shutting this party down.
11
00:04:07,639 --> 00:04:10,339
You don't wanna shut the party down.
You wanna join us.
12
00:04:10,239 --> 00:04:10,885
Alright?
13
00:04:10,814 --> 00:04:12,479
So why don't you put the guns back in the car
14
00:04:12,479 --> 00:04:14,144
and you come on in, and having good times?
15
00:04:14,272 --> 00:04:15,395
Hey, Bill.
16
00:04:15,395 --> 00:04:16,519
Sorry I'm late, buddy.
17
00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:17,603
Fucking Map Quest.
18
00:04:17,603 --> 00:04:18,560
I know it, bro.
19
00:04:18,689 --> 00:04:21,435
I'm right with you with that shit.
Hey look, guys.
20
00:04:21,564 --> 00:04:25,060
Is this about earlier? When you first came on,
and I thought you were strippers?
21
00:04:25,189 --> 00:04:26,854
Because that was an accident.
22
00:04:26,854 --> 00:04:28,519
Alright? You're just very attractive.
23
00:04:28,647 --> 00:04:29,977
Those uniforms are banging.
24
00:04:30,106 --> 00:04:33,435
Seriously, if we have to come out here again,
it's a $1000 fine.
25
00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:34,583
Close it down.
26
00:04:34,583 --> 00:04:35,602
Okay.
27
00:04:35,731 --> 00:04:36,977
Message received.
28
00:04:37,106 --> 00:04:38,477
It's done.
You have my word.
29
00:04:38,606 --> 00:04:41,106
I'm gonna go inside,
get on the mike, shut it down.
30
00:04:58,064 --> 00:05:00,602
I don't understand why you won't just put it on.
31
00:05:00,689 --> 00:05:02,852
Because I don't find the notion of mocking
32
00:05:03,022 --> 00:05:05,769
the American underclass as amusing as your friends do,
33
00:05:05,897 --> 00:05:08,602
and partly because I don't share your desperate need to fit
in.
34
00:05:08,731 --> 00:05:11,685
By not putting the wig on,
you are deliberately setting yourself
35
00:05:11,814 --> 00:05:13,227
and me apart from my friends,
36
00:05:13,356 --> 00:05:16,185
which is a controlling and hostile gesture.
37
00:05:16,314 --> 00:05:17,769
Fine.
38
00:05:21,747 --> 00:05:22,370
Happy now?
39
00:05:22,270 --> 00:05:22,894
Yes!
40
00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:23,987
Now I'm Mr. Fun Times.
41
00:05:23,637 --> 00:05:25,437
I'm very happy about that. Thank you.
42
00:05:25,478 --> 00:05:26,563
I'm going for a smoke.
43
00:05:26,186 --> 00:05:29,086
Good, because it's.. it's a fucking costume party.
44
00:05:32,144 --> 00:05:34,646
Do we need to talk quietly around her?
45
00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:37,230
Oh, no, no, no.
She sleeps through anything.
46
00:05:37,352 --> 00:05:38,813
Yes, you do.
47
00:05:38,977 --> 00:05:43,230
When the babysitter bailed, Glenn and I were like,
'Fuck it.' We have missed every party.
48
00:05:43,352 --> 00:05:45,396
No way we're missing the White Trash Bash.
49
00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:49,105
Give it up for Glenn.
Glenn's getting married soon.
50
00:05:49,227 --> 00:05:51,521
I really did it.
51
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:55,313
What's the deal with your bachelorette weekend?
52
00:05:55,136 --> 00:05:55,845
Yeah!
53
00:05:56,145 --> 00:05:56,855
Ok, I think it's gonna be
54
00:05:56,977 --> 00:05:58,896
more of a bachelorette night.
55
00:05:59,219 --> 00:06:02,930
And it's gonna be at my folks' place in Jersey.
56
00:06:03,394 --> 00:06:04,625
Oh.
57
00:06:05,125 --> 00:06:05,625
Sorry.
58
00:06:05,877 --> 00:06:08,338
No! That's gonna be fine.
That's totally fine.
59
00:06:08,561 --> 00:06:09,855
Has anyone seen Glenn?
60
00:06:09,977 --> 00:06:12,605
Human torpedo!
61
00:06:24,727 --> 00:06:26,896
It's okay.
He's a doctor.
62
00:06:31,311 --> 00:06:33,188
Hey, buttheads,
you guys seen Duquez?
63
00:06:33,311 --> 00:06:35,230
Will you relax with the doughnuts?
64
00:06:35,352 --> 00:06:39,480
Oh, sweetie, I want to. Look, I'm trying to push
the savory on this people and all they want is the sweet.
65
00:06:39,602 --> 00:06:40,896
I promise you no one cares.
66
00:06:41,019 --> 00:06:43,313
Hey.
Where the fuck are the doughnuts?
67
00:06:43,686 --> 00:06:44,813
Except him.
68
00:06:45,102 --> 00:06:47,230
Guess what. D.Duquez is AWOL.
69
00:06:47,352 --> 00:06:48,052
That is unacceptable.
70
00:06:48,052 --> 00:06:50,513
This fucking behaviour is unacceptable.
I got have it out with that guy.
71
00:06:50,936 --> 00:06:52,646
Like the doughnut police.
72
00:06:52,769 --> 00:06:55,313
Hey, get off of that thing.
It's Saturday night.
73
00:06:55,436 --> 00:06:58,980
Well, it's Sunday in Korea,
and those motherfuckers don't stop working.
74
00:06:59,102 --> 00:07:01,396
Honestly, they make the Japanese look like Jamaicans.
75
00:07:01,519 --> 00:07:03,103
Is that the new Blackberry?
76
00:07:03,103 --> 00:07:04,688
Yes, it is new Blackberry. Got it at the office.
77
00:07:04,811 --> 00:07:07,980
You know what? As punishment for not dressing up,
I'm putting this down my pants.
78
00:07:08,102 --> 00:07:10,063
No, no, no!
Just don't do that!
79
00:07:10,186 --> 00:07:11,688
My dick's checking your e-mail.
80
00:07:11,811 --> 00:07:12,311
I'm sending a text.
81
00:07:12,311 --> 00:07:13,011
No, just don't do that!
82
00:07:13,644 --> 00:07:16,480
You have my life in your pants.
You cocksucker.
83
00:07:24,519 --> 00:07:27,563
Hey, you two,
get a room or get a video camera.
84
00:07:29,852 --> 00:07:31,521
Hello.
Excuse me, miss.
85
00:07:31,644 --> 00:07:34,271
My name is Eric. This is my house.
My party, sort of.
86
00:07:34,394 --> 00:07:37,646
See, you're looking at a bunch different of options.
But, this is the one you want go for it..
87
00:07:37,769 --> 00:07:40,271
This is the finest box of wine in the county.
88
00:07:40,394 --> 00:07:41,000
Really?
89
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:41,605
Yes, delicious
90
00:07:41,727 --> 00:07:45,730
It has absolutely no body and an
amazing cough-syrupy aftertaste.
91
00:07:45,852 --> 00:07:46,352
Go ahead.
92
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:46,999
Cheers.
93
00:07:47,146 --> 00:07:49,946
Knock it up! Don't get it on your skin.
All right?
94
00:07:52,102 --> 00:07:53,202
Not bad, right?
95
00:07:53,202 --> 00:07:53,902
Mmm. Really good wine.
96
00:07:55,727 --> 00:07:56,527
Even better bean dip.
97
00:07:56,527 --> 00:07:57,307
That's not bean dip!
98
00:07:57,307 --> 00:07:58,603
What?!
99
00:07:58,653 --> 00:07:59,446
I'm kidding.
100
00:07:59,519 --> 00:08:01,396
You knew that.
That's awesome.
101
00:08:01,519 --> 00:08:02,619
You're only the first person to actually eat out of that.
102
00:08:03,119 --> 00:08:05,819
Yeah, not many people are thrilled about eating out of a shitter.
103
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:06,719
---
104
00:08:06,719 --> 00:08:07,018
Really?
105
00:08:08,018 --> 00:08:09,718
Couse in prison, we used our crapper as a punchbowl.
106
00:08:10,144 --> 00:08:11,563
Really?
No kidding?
107
00:08:11,686 --> 00:08:14,230
I have never seen you at one of these things.
I'm i wrong?
108
00:08:14,352 --> 00:08:15,052
First time.
109
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:16,338
Really? We'll have to change that.
110
00:08:16,561 --> 00:08:18,261
We do these kind of things all the time. You know..
111
00:08:19,061 --> 00:08:21,383
Labor Day. We're gonna have a big Winter Wonderland party.
112
00:08:21,344 --> 00:08:22,095
It's gonna be nice.
113
00:08:22,895 --> 00:08:23,646
It's gonna be.. Snow machine..
114
00:08:23,769 --> 00:08:25,896
Gonna be sledding.
Should be interesting.
115
00:08:26,019 --> 00:08:27,896
You should give me your information.
116
00:08:28,019 --> 00:08:28,603
What?
117
00:08:28,603 --> 00:08:29,188
"Information"?
118
00:08:29,311 --> 00:08:29,937
Are you kidding me?
119
00:08:29,937 --> 00:08:30,563
No.
120
00:08:30,686 --> 00:08:31,228
Really?
121
00:08:31,228 --> 00:08:31,771
Yes.
122
00:08:31,894 --> 00:08:33,063
Yes, like what?
123
00:08:33,186 --> 00:08:35,563
Like my social security number,
my college GPA?
124
00:08:35,686 --> 00:08:38,980
Why don't we shirt with your
phone number and your shoe size?
125
00:08:41,811 --> 00:08:43,208
I happen to have a pen.
126
00:08:43,708 --> 00:08:45,105
Of course you have a pen.
127
00:08:44,727 --> 00:08:47,396
You gotta be ready.
Always be prepared.
128
00:08:47,519 --> 00:08:48,688
What?
129
00:08:48,811 --> 00:08:49,833
On my baby.
130
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:50,855
Look at that.
131
00:08:50,977 --> 00:08:54,105
Oh, I'm so jealous of this baby.
I'm so jealous.
132
00:08:54,227 --> 00:08:57,771
Oh, you wanna get out,
I wanna get in there. I'm kidding.
133
00:08:57,894 --> 00:08:59,605
Kelly, local number?
134
00:08:59,727 --> 00:09:00,813
Local girl.
135
00:09:00,936 --> 00:09:02,063
You kidding me?
136
00:09:02,185 --> 00:09:03,688
Size 9 shoe.
137
00:09:03,810 --> 00:09:06,354
You know what they say.
'Big shoe, big uterus.'
138
00:09:07,685 --> 00:09:09,688
I'll bring friends.
Real sorry.
139
00:09:09,810 --> 00:09:12,396
If you excuse me,
I see an old friend just showed up.
140
00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:13,646
I'll talk to you liner
141
00:09:13,769 --> 00:09:15,313
Okay.
It's very nice meeting you.
142
00:09:15,435 --> 00:09:16,938
Nice to meet you too.
Hey, fucko.
143
00:09:17,060 --> 00:09:18,604
Excuse me.
144
00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:21,688
I'm really mad, actually.
145
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:21,812
What's wrong with this guy?
146
00:09:21,812 --> 00:09:22,813
Bye, guys.
147
00:09:22,935 --> 00:09:24,313
Daddy's gotta go home.
148
00:09:24,435 --> 00:09:26,729
One more for the road.
Shotgun!
149
00:09:28,285 --> 00:09:28,885
Michael!
150
00:09:29,382 --> 00:09:30,582
I wasn't ready. Throw me another.
151
00:09:30,082 --> 00:09:30,802
Nice, asshole!
152
00:09:31,124 --> 00:09:32,146
You're supposed to catch that.
153
00:09:32,269 --> 00:09:33,688
Come on, baby, we're going.
154
00:09:33,810 --> 00:09:34,374
Bye, guys.
155
00:09:34,374 --> 00:09:34,938
Bye, Katie.
156
00:09:35,060 --> 00:09:36,813
I'm sorry if I got beer on your baby.
157
00:09:37,144 --> 00:09:38,688
You, you.
Where have you been?
158
00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:40,979
I'm sorry, man.
There was a fucking mess in the studio.
159
00:09:41,102 --> 00:09:43,063
There was this buzzing undertone
160
00:09:43,185 --> 00:09:45,646
that was bending me over and fucking me in the ass.
161
00:09:46,269 --> 00:09:48,313
I'm not seeing any doughnuts.
162
00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:49,979
You specifically said get the glazed.
163
00:09:50,102 --> 00:09:52,479
They didn't have glazed.
I tried. There was jelly.
164
00:09:52,602 --> 00:09:55,938
There was Boston cream.
Jelly, Boston cream.
165
00:09:56,060 --> 00:09:58,979
Eric, I have a whole package of ginger candies in my bag.
166
00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:01,313
Hi, Willow.
167
00:10:01,394 --> 00:10:03,479
Mmm, thank you.
But we're gonna be okay.
168
00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:05,438
I found you a big brown naked!
169
00:10:05,560 --> 00:10:07,521
I can't get it off!
I can't shake it off!
170
00:10:07,644 --> 00:10:10,313
Hey, everybody naked in the pool.
171
00:10:15,102 --> 00:10:17,104
Well, that's a half hour ahead of schedule.
172
00:10:18,894 --> 00:10:21,604
Yeah!
Anybody?
173
00:10:21,727 --> 00:10:23,188
Anybody?
174
00:10:23,310 --> 00:10:25,688
Oh, you all suck.
Chicken shit!
175
00:10:25,810 --> 00:10:28,146
Want me to go to Brent's?
Pick up Entenmann's?
176
00:10:28,146 --> 00:10:29,969
No, no, don't worry about it. It's allright.
177
00:10:29,969 --> 00:10:31,438
Right now, I'm gonna go jump in that pool
178
00:10:31,519 --> 00:10:33,521
because McCrudden is dying in there alone.
179
00:10:33,644 --> 00:10:36,771
That's what friends do.
See, they don't leave each other hanging.
180
00:10:36,894 --> 00:10:39,271
Where's your patriotism?
181
00:10:39,394 --> 00:10:40,479
My man.
182
00:10:40,602 --> 00:10:42,146
I got you.
183
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,229
My fucking blackberry.
184
00:11:11,685 --> 00:11:13,229
Hey dad, what are you doing here?
185
00:11:13,352 --> 00:11:15,146
Uh, hmm.
186
00:11:15,269 --> 00:11:18,396
Oh, yeah, I own the place.
Cherie, this is my son, Eric.
187
00:11:18,519 --> 00:11:20,771
Hi.
He's told me all about you.
188
00:11:22,852 --> 00:11:23,979
Ah, yeah.
189
00:11:24,102 --> 00:11:26,354
Great party.
Thanks for letting us sleep it off.
190
00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:27,312
No problem.
191
00:11:28,312 --> 00:11:31,012
Hm. It must have been quite a fiesta.
192
00:11:31,144 --> 00:11:32,354
Oh, yeah,
I guess so.
193
00:11:32,477 --> 00:11:34,188
Did the best I could with the turds.
194
00:11:34,310 --> 00:11:36,082
I know you did, Bill.
195
00:11:36,082 --> 00:11:37,854
I wish you would have let me know you were coming out.
196
00:11:37,977 --> 00:11:40,063
Maybe we can throw someone down on a couch.
Or something like that.
197
00:11:40,185 --> 00:11:41,688
Ah, we're not staying.
198
00:11:41,810 --> 00:11:46,229
I just came out for the day to do a
meet-and-greet with the brokers.
199
00:11:46,352 --> 00:11:47,479
Brokers?
200
00:11:47,602 --> 00:11:49,438
You got the message, right?
201
00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:51,521
I saw that you called.
202
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,688
I'm putting the house on the market.
203
00:11:54,644 --> 00:11:56,771
What?
Wait, you're selling our house?
204
00:11:57,894 --> 00:12:01,229
Ah, I'm hardly ever out here any more.
205
00:12:01,352 --> 00:12:03,854
It's time to unload.
206
00:12:03,977 --> 00:12:05,271
But hey,
what about me?
207
00:12:05,394 --> 00:12:09,479
I'm always out here.
My friends are always out here.
208
00:12:10,060 --> 00:12:11,854
So make me an offer.
209
00:12:14,894 --> 00:12:17,146
Dad, come on.
I don't ask you for anything.
210
00:12:17,269 --> 00:12:19,188
How about this?
We go get breakfast.
211
00:12:19,310 --> 00:12:20,979
We talk over the house situation.
212
00:12:20,602 --> 00:12:22,729
Maybe we all can chip in for utilities?
213
00:12:23,052 --> 00:12:25,013
Ah, I'm a little pressed for time, kiddo.
214
00:12:25,877 --> 00:12:29,879
We're gonna go play a quick nine and then got get back.
215
00:12:29,602 --> 00:12:31,354
Cherie's never played before.
216
00:12:31,477 --> 00:12:32,812
I'm so excited.
217
00:12:32,932 --> 00:12:34,482
Dad, this is fucking bullshit.
218
00:12:34,599 --> 00:12:37,649
I'll call you next week.
We'll do yoga.
219
00:12:48,932 --> 00:12:51,607
I've said it before and I'll say it again.
220
00:12:51,724 --> 00:12:54,357
Your dad is a selfish prick.
221
00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:56,982
Smoothie?
222
00:12:56,599 --> 00:12:58,690
It's gonna be sad not coming out here anymore.
223
00:12:58,807 --> 00:13:01,274
Me and Willy might not even be around next summer.
224
00:13:01,390 --> 00:13:03,774
The L.A. thing again?
Are you serious?
225
00:13:03,890 --> 00:13:05,940
You just moved into that place in Brooklyn.
226
00:13:06,057 --> 00:13:08,357
But Willow's doing really good with her acting career.
227
00:13:08,474 --> 00:13:11,232
She did that Pizza Hut Latin America commercial now.
228
00:13:11,349 --> 00:13:13,440
<i>Ooh, deliciosa!</i>
229
00:13:14,890 --> 00:13:17,607
Her dad is gonna hook me up with a job at a big law firm.
230
00:13:17,724 --> 00:13:18,982
Dude, what about the fucking album?
231
00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:21,149
I'll work on the album while I'm doing law things.
232
00:13:21,265 --> 00:13:22,457
Oh, yeah? Will you?
233
00:13:22,457 --> 00:13:23,649
You know what I'm excited about?
234
00:13:24,265 --> 00:13:27,190
Throwing one of these parties
in my one-bedroom apartment in New York city.
235
00:13:27,107 --> 00:13:28,490
That'll be fun, right?
236
00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:30,774
Maybe I can put, like, the food out on the fire escape.
237
00:13:31,390 --> 00:13:32,011
Eric.
238
00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:32,732
The band in the bathroom.
239
00:13:32,849 --> 00:13:34,232
I have to get more outlets though.
240
00:13:34,349 --> 00:13:36,690
I'll get a power strip.
Why not? I'll splurge.
241
00:13:37,607 --> 00:13:38,341
What?
242
00:13:38,090 --> 00:13:40,190
This is a major moment.
243
00:13:40,190 --> 00:13:42,190
It's okay to let the hurt in.
244
00:13:42,190 --> 00:13:46,190
To allow yourself to actually be present in a moment.
245
00:13:45,807 --> 00:13:48,907
Okay, thanks, doc.
You really make the moment more real
246
00:13:48,907 --> 00:13:51,399
by talking about how real the moment is in the middle.
247
00:13:51,515 --> 00:13:54,565
No, I understand.
You're probably feeling
248
00:13:54,682 --> 00:13:56,940
some anger and some misdirected frustra...
249
00:13:58,682 --> 00:13:59,707
Feel better now?
250
00:13:59,707 --> 00:14:00,732
A little bit, yeah.
251
00:14:00,949 --> 00:14:01,949
Dude, that was awesome.
252
00:14:02,449 --> 00:14:03,124
Oh, fuck!
253
00:14:04,449 --> 00:14:05,832
What about now?
254
00:14:05,649 --> 00:14:06,824
Oh, much better.
255
00:14:07,140 --> 00:14:08,815
Now I'm in the moment.
256
00:14:10,790 --> 00:14:12,965
<i>I don't understand all the summer school things.</i>
257
00:14:12,182 --> 00:14:14,857
Isn't the point of being a teacher
that you get summers off?
258
00:14:14,974 --> 00:14:18,190
Yeah, well, they pay us poop, so,
what am I gonna do, waitress?
259
00:14:18,307 --> 00:14:20,857
Oh, my God,
the big news.
260
00:14:21,432 --> 00:14:24,690
So the principal told me today
261
00:14:24,307 --> 00:14:29,774
that the friendship bracelets that the girls
are wearing are actually sex bracelets.
262
00:14:31,340 --> 00:14:33,390
I saw something about that on Oprah.
263
00:14:33,807 --> 00:14:36,024
Girls wear these different color bracelets
264
00:14:36,140 --> 00:14:39,024
and every color represents, like,
a sex thing.
265
00:14:39,140 --> 00:14:41,690
So if you tear off a girl's blue bracelet,
266
00:14:41,807 --> 00:14:43,690
that means she has to give you oral.
267
00:14:44,190 --> 00:14:46,146
What's a yellow bracelet?
268
00:14:45,646 --> 00:14:46,809
Uh, a hug.
269
00:14:46,938 --> 00:14:47,603
Aww. Oh, sweet.
270
00:14:47,603 --> 00:14:48,268
I know.
271
00:14:48,268 --> 00:14:50,646
What about purple?
272
00:14:50,646 --> 00:14:51,684
Teabagging?
273
00:14:53,563 --> 00:14:54,684
Really?
274
00:14:54,813 --> 00:14:56,809
Well, what is teabagging?
275
00:14:56,938 --> 00:14:58,018
Balls in mouth.
276
00:14:58,146 --> 00:14:59,809
Oh, no!
277
00:14:59,938 --> 00:15:02,684
Teabagging? What is with the kids today?
278
00:15:02,684 --> 00:15:05,646
Well, the blowjob is the new French kiss.
279
00:15:05,646 --> 00:15:07,643
Wow, we really missed the boat on that one.
280
00:15:07,771 --> 00:15:10,476
I feel like if we had had sex bracelets back then,
281
00:15:10,605 --> 00:15:12,226
no one would have torn mine off.
282
00:15:12,355 --> 00:15:14,601
No, no, no, sweetie.
283
00:15:14,730 --> 00:15:16,976
I would have torn off your BJ bracelet.
284
00:15:17,105 --> 00:15:19,768
You're just saying that,
but thanks, Eric.
285
00:15:19,896 --> 00:15:21,559
Thanks for letting me blow you.
286
00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:22,832
You're welcome.
287
00:15:22,832 --> 00:15:23,976
You're such a good friend.
288
00:15:28,271 --> 00:15:30,809
Hey, Dody.
289
00:15:33,938 --> 00:15:36,309
Hi. Can I help you?
290
00:15:36,438 --> 00:15:37,269
Are you Eric?
291
00:15:37,269 --> 00:15:38,101
Yes.
292
00:15:38,230 --> 00:15:40,268
Hi. We spoke on the phone.
293
00:15:40,396 --> 00:15:43,101
I'm Dody Henderson from the Henderson Realty Group.
294
00:15:43,230 --> 00:15:45,184
And this is my associate Kelly Tanner.
295
00:15:45,313 --> 00:15:47,768
Hi. How are you?
296
00:15:49,405 --> 00:15:50,484
No, thank you.
297
00:15:50,313 --> 00:15:51,434
Lame.
298
00:15:51,563 --> 00:15:52,601
Oh, I shouldn't.
299
00:15:53,896 --> 00:15:56,684
We can't wait to get your house sold.
300
00:15:56,813 --> 00:15:59,101
We need this place clean, clean, clean every day.
301
00:15:59,229 --> 00:16:00,767
Water the lawns,
skim the pool.
302
00:16:00,854 --> 00:16:05,184
You never know when buyers are
gonna stop by to say hi and buy, buy.
303
00:16:05,313 --> 00:16:07,142
Oh, B-U-Y!
Ha, ha!
304
00:16:07,271 --> 00:16:09,351
Whatever.
305
00:16:09,479 --> 00:16:13,434
Oh, and make sure the toilets
are clean enough to eat out of it.
306
00:16:13,563 --> 00:16:15,101
Yeah, whatever.
307
00:16:15,563 --> 00:16:18,392
Maybe I should sprinkle some
rose petals on the driveway every morning too.
308
00:16:18,521 --> 00:16:20,101
Just do what you can.
309
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:20,929
Will do.
310
00:16:22,938 --> 00:16:26,267
What are the chances of maybe
selling this sometime after Labor Day?
311
00:16:27,021 --> 00:16:29,559
You wanna sell a summer home during the summer.
312
00:16:29,688 --> 00:16:30,934
That's kind of the point.
313
00:16:31,771 --> 00:16:33,851
So glad we're in business together.
314
00:16:33,979 --> 00:16:35,267
<i>Om shanti.</i>
315
00:16:36,021 --> 00:16:37,767
<i>Om shanti</i> it is.
316
00:16:41,146 --> 00:16:42,146
Vultures.
317
00:16:42,146 --> 00:16:42,846
Yeesh.
318
00:16:45,021 --> 00:16:47,601
It's light.
It's light.
319
00:16:47,729 --> 00:16:49,892
We should put it up more closer.
Like there?
320
00:16:50,021 --> 00:16:53,434
Oh, yeah.
That'll bring in all the right clientele.
321
00:17:02,479 --> 00:17:05,767
Listen. Have you given any more
thought to the final Labor Day blowout?
322
00:17:05,896 --> 00:17:07,101
I really don't know.
323
00:17:07,229 --> 00:17:09,642
I mean, obviously,
we got do something huge.
324
00:17:09,771 --> 00:17:12,101
But what do you do for a final blowout?
325
00:17:12,229 --> 00:17:14,851
Go out in a fucking blaze of glory.
Heads held high. You know what i'm sayin?
326
00:17:14,979 --> 00:17:15,607
I get it.
327
00:17:15,607 --> 00:17:16,434
Deserved it.
328
00:17:16,563 --> 00:17:18,351
Holy shit. Oh, shit.
Here we go. Bingo.
329
00:17:18,479 --> 00:17:19,179
What?
330
00:17:19,179 --> 00:17:20,351
I got the concept right here.
331
00:17:20,479 --> 00:17:21,934
Brown party...
332
00:17:22,479 --> 00:17:23,601
Brown party.- Brown party...
333
00:17:23,729 --> 00:17:25,892
Brown clothes,
brown food, brown drink,
334
00:17:26,021 --> 00:17:27,921
brown clown,
brown balloons,
335
00:17:27,921 --> 00:17:30,121
live music supplied by Jackson Browne.
336
00:17:31,821 --> 00:17:33,321
I don't know what you're thinking right now.
Is that good?
337
00:17:33,321 --> 00:17:34,809
It's fucking awful.
338
00:17:35,238 --> 00:17:37,901
Alright, take it easy.
I'm just spit balling headchief.
339
00:17:37,901 --> 00:17:39,851
It's not like you're throwing ideas my way.
340
00:17:39,979 --> 00:17:41,061
He spells with an <i>E</i> at the end.
341
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:42,142
Doesn't matter.
342
00:17:42,271 --> 00:17:43,771
Holy shit.
We got a situation here.
343
00:17:45,063 --> 00:17:46,809
Oh, my fucking God.
344
00:17:47,438 --> 00:17:49,726
Dude, she's wearing a sex bracelet.
345
00:17:49,354 --> 00:17:50,726
Holy fuck,
she is.
346
00:17:50,854 --> 00:17:52,754
Oh, boy,
that's trouble.
347
00:17:52,754 --> 00:17:53,854
It's blue. It's blue.
348
00:17:54,454 --> 00:17:56,442
Sword swallower.
349
00:17:55,771 --> 00:17:57,771
Holy fuck man, when she reaches out for my cone
350
00:17:57,771 --> 00:17:58,684
I'm gonna snag that thing
351
00:17:58,813 --> 00:18:00,976
and it's deep-throat city all night long.
352
00:18:01,104 --> 00:18:02,434
No, no, no.
353
00:18:02,434 --> 00:18:04,734
Please don't do that. Don't. No, stop.
354
00:18:05,646 --> 00:18:07,392
Stop! Stop it
355
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:12,059
I bet she unhinges her jaw like a
fucking python swallowing a rat.
356
00:18:11,888 --> 00:18:14,676
Um, do you guys know what you want?
357
00:18:15,104 --> 00:18:15,704
Yes, we do.
358
00:18:15,704 --> 00:18:17,226
Yeah. We got a pretty good idea.
359
00:18:17,354 --> 00:18:18,976
No, ice cream is what we're into.
360
00:18:21,938 --> 00:18:25,684
Do you think a girl like that looks at
us like we're a couple of old dudes?
361
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:26,913
You know like the way we used to look at
362
00:18:26,913 --> 00:18:29,101
30-year-old guys back in high school and say,
363
00:18:29,229 --> 00:18:32,767
'Oh, man, look at that lame old guy hitting on Sue.'
364
00:18:32,767 --> 00:18:35,646
Ha, ha. Yeah, probably.
365
00:18:35,646 --> 00:18:36,546
Shit, I don't know though.
366
00:18:36,546 --> 00:18:38,392
Weren't 30-year-old guys a lot older back then
367
00:18:38,392 --> 00:18:40,101
with, like,
mustaches and jobs?
368
00:18:40,229 --> 00:18:42,434
Yeah It certainly seemed like it
369
00:18:43,771 --> 00:18:44,851
What?
370
00:18:44,979 --> 00:18:46,279
Fuck, dude, we're getting old.
371
00:18:46,279 --> 00:18:47,142
Bullshit. Come on.
372
00:18:47,271 --> 00:18:49,642
Seriously, I got a foot cramp the other day masturbating.
373
00:18:49,771 --> 00:18:51,269
What? Doesn't make sense.
374
00:18:51,269 --> 00:18:52,767
I swear to God. It happened.
375
00:18:52,896 --> 00:18:53,696
What about this,
376
00:18:53,696 --> 00:18:56,101
Do you think that girl and her
friends really have BJ orgy parties?
377
00:18:56,229 --> 00:18:57,029
Indubitably
378
00:18:57,029 --> 00:18:57,434
Really?
379
00:18:57,563 --> 00:18:59,601
Fucking 'A' man, Duquez is right.
We got fucking hosed.
380
00:18:59,729 --> 00:19:01,726
God dang.
381
00:19:02,729 --> 00:19:04,601
Hey, what about that?
382
00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:05,726
What about what?
383
00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:07,601
What about that for the final party?
384
00:19:07,929 --> 00:19:08,929
What?
385
00:19:08,929 --> 00:19:09,929
An orgy.
386
00:19:09,929 --> 00:19:11,011
An orgy?
387
00:19:11,011 --> 00:19:11,759
An orgy...
388
00:19:11,688 --> 00:19:12,688
You wanna have an fucking orgy?
389
00:19:12,688 --> 00:19:13,226
Yeah, why not?
390
00:19:13,354 --> 00:19:15,059
Get the fuck out of town.
It'll never happen.
391
00:19:15,188 --> 00:19:16,476
Why not?
392
00:19:16,604 --> 00:19:18,726
Because people don't have orgies,
you know?
393
00:19:18,854 --> 00:19:20,309
Oh, come on.
They used to.
394
00:19:20,438 --> 00:19:21,038
True.
395
00:19:21,038 --> 00:19:22,267
Yeah, think about it, dude.
396
00:19:22,396 --> 00:19:25,309
An orgy.
A good old-fashioned orgy.
397
00:19:25,771 --> 00:19:26,571
Wowie.
398
00:19:26,571 --> 00:19:28,142
That is a blaze of glory.
399
00:19:28,271 --> 00:19:31,267
Okay.
Now you know I hate naysayers, right?
400
00:19:31,396 --> 00:19:32,892
But I'm gonna have to say nay.
401
00:19:33,021 --> 00:19:33,707
Really?
402
00:19:33,707 --> 00:19:34,392
Really.
403
00:19:34,521 --> 00:19:36,142
Are you throwing down the gauntlet?
404
00:19:36,271 --> 00:19:38,225
Oops, what's that?
405
00:19:38,354 --> 00:19:40,684
It's on the ground as we speak.
406
00:19:42,521 --> 00:19:43,892
We're gonna have an orgy.
407
00:19:45,187 --> 00:19:46,767
We're gonna have an orgy.
408
00:19:46,937 --> 00:19:48,767
Oh, boy.
Here we go.
409
00:19:50,312 --> 00:19:52,350
Okay, guys,
I've been mulling it over and
410
00:19:52,479 --> 00:19:54,434
I have a concept for the final fiesta.
411
00:19:54,562 --> 00:19:55,456
All right.
412
00:19:55,456 --> 00:19:56,350
What is it?
413
00:19:56,479 --> 00:19:57,164
Whoo!
414
00:19:57,164 --> 00:19:57,850
Fiesta
415
00:19:57,979 --> 00:20:00,017
Allright, while this will be the most spectacular
416
00:20:00,146 --> 00:20:04,350
and insane party any of us have taken part of,
it's not gonna be a big thing.
417
00:20:04,479 --> 00:20:05,767
It's just gonna be us.
418
00:20:05,896 --> 00:20:06,896
It's gonna be small,
419
00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:08,973
intimate,
420
00:20:10,273 --> 00:20:11,073
special.
421
00:20:11,373 --> 00:20:12,973
Oh, I'll make lasagna.
422
00:20:13,373 --> 00:20:14,767
Yummy.
423
00:20:14,367 --> 00:20:15,734
Oh, yeah.
424
00:20:15,562 --> 00:20:16,850
We're gonna have an orgy.
425
00:20:20,729 --> 00:20:21,727
Who?
426
00:20:21,727 --> 00:20:22,725
Us.
427
00:20:23,979 --> 00:20:25,079
Where?
428
00:20:25,079 --> 00:20:26,684
Here, right here. Labor Day weekend.
429
00:20:26,812 --> 00:20:30,725
Us?
A naked sex orgy?
430
00:20:30,854 --> 00:20:32,102
You're kidding, right?
431
00:20:32,102 --> 00:20:33,350
No, I'm not. Why not us?
432
00:20:33,479 --> 00:20:35,309
People used to have them all the time.
433
00:20:35,437 --> 00:20:36,642
All the time.
434
00:20:36,771 --> 00:20:38,309
Yeah! What happened to our generation?
435
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:39,337
What happened?
436
00:20:39,337 --> 00:20:40,684
I'll tell you exactly what happened.
437
00:20:40,812 --> 00:20:43,559
AIDS.
438
00:20:43,687 --> 00:20:45,309
AIDS hit right when we hit puberty.
439
00:20:45,309 --> 00:20:47,646
And it scared the shit out of all of us.
440
00:20:47,646 --> 00:20:51,642
It turned sex into this big,
frightening thing.
441
00:20:51,771 --> 00:20:53,142
He's right.
442
00:20:53,271 --> 00:20:56,975
Kids today are freaks,
our parents were freaks,
443
00:20:57,104 --> 00:20:58,725
we're a bunch of fucking pussies.
444
00:20:58,854 --> 00:21:00,164
We're the lamest generation.
445
00:21:00,164 --> 00:21:01,475
This is our chance.
446
00:21:01,604 --> 00:21:02,850
Our chance to do it right.
447
00:21:02,979 --> 00:21:05,017
Take back what's been taken from us.
448
00:21:05,017 --> 00:21:06,332
Isn't that from Goonies?
449
00:21:06,332 --> 00:21:07,646
Yeah, I'm paraphrasing Goonies, yes.
450
00:21:07,646 --> 00:21:08,977
Orgy.
451
00:21:08,977 --> 00:21:10,309
Orgy...
452
00:21:10,396 --> 00:21:14,267
Orgy.
453
00:21:14,396 --> 00:21:16,725
Duquez, come on my men.
You're into this, right?
454
00:21:16,854 --> 00:21:20,184
What?
No.
455
00:21:20,312 --> 00:21:23,309
We're all friends.
It would just be too weird.
456
00:21:23,437 --> 00:21:25,137
How do you know unless you try?
457
00:21:25,737 --> 00:21:26,950
Ew!
458
00:21:26,479 --> 00:21:28,979
Look, if we all went into this with an open mind,
459
00:21:29,779 --> 00:21:31,679
it could be amazing.
460
00:21:31,229 --> 00:21:34,434
In theory,
a noble call to arms.
461
00:21:34,562 --> 00:21:39,267
In practice,
I cannot imagine a more awkward
462
00:21:39,396 --> 00:21:41,434
and uncomfortably terrible evening.
463
00:21:41,562 --> 00:21:44,348
Oh, laugh, laugh,
laugh all you want.
464
00:21:44,481 --> 00:21:46,723
Seriously, don't you get it?
This is it,
465
00:21:46,856 --> 00:21:49,932
the final blowout,
and then the house is gone.
466
00:21:50,064 --> 00:21:51,727
People move away.
467
00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:53,390
Things change.
468
00:21:53,523 --> 00:21:55,973
We need to think outside of the box.
469
00:21:56,106 --> 00:21:59,057
And inside the box.
470
00:21:59,189 --> 00:22:00,432
Eww.
471
00:22:00,564 --> 00:22:02,640
Mike, come on man, that's not what I'm going for.
472
00:22:02,773 --> 00:22:04,098
I'm in.
473
00:22:04,524 --> 00:22:05,681
What?
474
00:22:05,815 --> 00:22:06,889
Are you serious?
475
00:22:07,024 --> 00:22:09,139
Yes, it worked.
476
00:22:09,274 --> 00:22:11,056
Come on.
An orgy?
477
00:22:11,190 --> 00:22:12,556
It's madness.
478
00:22:12,690 --> 00:22:13,390
Ugh.
479
00:22:13,390 --> 00:22:15,764
It's gonna be a fucking blast.
480
00:22:15,899 --> 00:22:17,431
Success!
Success!
481
00:22:17,565 --> 00:22:19,722
Sue's in.
Thank you, yes.
482
00:22:19,857 --> 00:22:20,889
Here we go.
Come on.
483
00:22:21,024 --> 00:22:22,373
I'm gonna go meet Marcus.
484
00:22:22,373 --> 00:22:23,722
Oh, my God.
485
00:22:23,857 --> 00:22:26,431
All right, think it over.
Think it... Everybody, okay.
486
00:22:26,565 --> 00:22:27,889
All right,
I get it.
487
00:22:28,024 --> 00:22:30,889
It's gonna take a while to come
around on this whole orgy idea.
488
00:22:31,024 --> 00:22:33,056
Right? Here?
No, okay. Ha, ha!
489
00:22:33,190 --> 00:22:36,931
Very good, but go ahead, type it in your BlackBerrys,
pencil it in your notebooks.
490
00:22:37,065 --> 00:22:39,389
Orgy.
Orgy.
491
00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:41,681
<i>Orgy.
Orgy.</i>
492
00:22:41,815 --> 00:22:44,847
<i>Orgy.
Orgy. Orgy.</i>
493
00:22:51,399 --> 00:22:54,931
So, Sue, you think this is how you're gonna
finally sleep with Eric?
494
00:22:54,931 --> 00:22:58,148
What? We dated in high school.
495
00:22:58,148 --> 00:22:59,722
Come on,
that was ages ago.
496
00:22:59,857 --> 00:23:01,639
You guys never,
you know, did it,
497
00:23:01,773 --> 00:23:03,597
so it's kind of unfinished business.
498
00:23:03,732 --> 00:23:07,097
Yeah, but I've slept with like a ton of guys since then,
499
00:23:07,232 --> 00:23:09,764
so this doesn't have anything to do with it.
500
00:23:09,898 --> 00:23:12,680
Ok fine, but other than social awkwardness,
501
00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:14,148
give me one reason.
502
00:23:14,148 --> 00:23:17,264
Oh, very well.
How about I give you several reasons?
503
00:23:17,398 --> 00:23:18,972
Like, oh,
I don't know,
504
00:23:19,107 --> 00:23:20,805
chlamydia, the herp,
505
00:23:20,940 --> 00:23:24,805
gonorrhea, syphilis, papilloma.
506
00:23:24,940 --> 00:23:26,305
The Steve McQueen movie?
507
00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:27,440
No, that's Papillon.
508
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:30,139
I'm talking about the virus that causes genital warts.
509
00:23:30,273 --> 00:23:32,472
Ugh.
Why do you think of this stuff?
510
00:23:32,607 --> 00:23:35,639
Don't you guys remember the article my
mom clipped from The New Yorker?
511
00:23:38,357 --> 00:23:39,639
No.
512
00:23:39,773 --> 00:23:42,180
Condoms can't stop it and it causes cervical cancer.
513
00:23:42,315 --> 00:23:44,222
You don't have a cervix.
514
00:23:44,773 --> 00:23:48,514
I don't know how you could have
sex in front of a room full of people.
515
00:23:48,648 --> 00:23:51,805
I mean,
I don't even like to get naked at the spa.
516
00:23:51,940 --> 00:23:54,805
I'm not saying that this is gonna be easy for me,
517
00:23:54,940 --> 00:23:57,930
but isn't that what kind of makes it exciting?
518
00:23:58,065 --> 00:24:00,639
I'm not saying that it wouldn't be fun,
519
00:24:00,773 --> 00:24:02,764
but it's an orgy.
520
00:24:02,898 --> 00:24:04,972
What's the point of losing all this weight
521
00:24:05,107 --> 00:24:07,097
if you're not gonna show off your new bod?
522
00:24:07,097 --> 00:24:09,148
I mean, You haven't even worn your bikini yet.
523
00:24:09,148 --> 00:24:10,597
I still have 5 more pounds.
524
00:24:10,732 --> 00:24:13,597
I just think this really could help build your self-esteem.
525
00:24:13,732 --> 00:24:19,180
There's the miracle cure. I'm gonna start turning
my clients onto group sex instead of Zoloft.
526
00:24:19,315 --> 00:24:21,555
We're going to the beach.
At least do that.
527
00:24:21,690 --> 00:24:22,727
C'mon. It's our last summer.
528
00:24:22,727 --> 00:24:23,764
Let's go to the beach.
529
00:24:23,398 --> 00:24:24,098
You know what?
530
00:24:24,098 --> 00:24:27,430
Shockingly, I'm gonna pass on the
stroll through the tick-infested dunes.
531
00:24:28,065 --> 00:24:29,597
Dude, I've had Lyme disease.
532
00:24:29,732 --> 00:24:32,264
It's not a big deal.
It's antibiotics, boom, done.
533
00:24:32,398 --> 00:24:35,639
You know I have a needle phobia.
Okay? I can't go to the doctor.
534
00:24:35,773 --> 00:24:38,430
The puncturing the veins and the... Ugh.
535
00:24:38,565 --> 00:24:41,055
Okay, whatever.
Enjoy the great indoors.
536
00:24:41,190 --> 00:24:43,389
Yeah. Bye.
537
00:24:43,523 --> 00:24:46,889
Ooh, hey, Eric.
Uh, could you grab some sand for my ass crack?
538
00:24:47,023 --> 00:24:48,597
I'll grab some for your cervix.
539
00:24:50,690 --> 00:24:53,055
Okay.
Let's say you dated four guys in one year,
540
00:24:53,190 --> 00:24:55,222
right, and you slept with them.
541
00:24:55,357 --> 00:24:56,456
You'd be cool with that?
542
00:24:56,456 --> 00:24:57,555
Totally.
543
00:24:57,690 --> 00:25:00,764
And how many guys have you slept with this year?
544
00:25:01,523 --> 00:25:03,555
None.
545
00:25:03,690 --> 00:25:05,097
Or the year before.
546
00:25:05,232 --> 00:25:08,597
So really all you're doing is sleeping with four guys
547
00:25:08,732 --> 00:25:11,139
in, like,
a shorter time frame.
548
00:25:12,232 --> 00:25:14,430
I never really thought of it that way.
549
00:25:15,565 --> 00:25:16,639
What do you think?
550
00:25:16,773 --> 00:25:19,930
Insane, idiotic and self-destructive.
551
00:25:21,930 --> 00:25:26,039
Okay, hypothetically.
552
00:25:24,039 --> 00:25:28,148
If I did decide to do it, but at the last minute,
553
00:25:28,148 --> 00:25:30,305
I totally freaked out,
554
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:33,430
they would let me out, right?
555
00:25:33,565 --> 00:25:35,847
Laura, it's an orgy,
not The Accused.
556
00:25:35,982 --> 00:25:39,097
It's not fun unless everybody's into it.
557
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:43,097
I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it.
558
00:25:43,232 --> 00:25:44,373
I'm gonna do it.
559
00:25:44,373 --> 00:25:45,514
Yeah? Yeah?
560
00:25:45,648 --> 00:25:46,685
I'm gonna do it.
561
00:25:46,685 --> 00:25:47,722
All right. Yeah, girl.
562
00:25:47,857 --> 00:25:50,055
Hey, guys,
what's the celebration?
563
00:25:51,982 --> 00:25:54,680
Just talking about how to get Laura back in the saddle.
564
00:25:54,815 --> 00:25:57,430
Whoo, yay!
I'm gonna find you a guy.
565
00:25:57,940 --> 00:26:00,347
Glenn's cousin Frank is coming to the wedding.
566
00:26:04,273 --> 00:26:06,305
Okay, Game on.
Let's go.
567
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:07,639
All right,
John Kruk.
568
00:26:07,773 --> 00:26:11,264
I'll tell you what I'm gonna throw,
and you're still gonna whiff at it.
569
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:14,139
Slow breaking curveball.
570
00:26:15,107 --> 00:26:16,180
Oh!
571
00:26:16,315 --> 00:26:18,347
Goddamn it!
I dare you to throw that shit again.
572
00:26:18,482 --> 00:26:21,472
Swish full,
the nerd's revenge.
573
00:26:21,607 --> 00:26:23,555
Ooh, I got my bunt face on.
574
00:26:23,555 --> 00:26:26,148
Drills, ladies. Drills. Let's go. Look alive.
575
00:26:26,148 --> 00:26:27,513
Album cover,
hat or no hat?
576
00:26:27,648 --> 00:26:29,638
Oh, Doug,
come on, man.
577
00:26:29,773 --> 00:26:31,680
You've been doing this for two years.
578
00:26:31,815 --> 00:26:34,305
Mixing, remixing.
Hatting, no hatting.
579
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,597
Your music's awesome.
You just get it out there.
580
00:26:36,731 --> 00:26:40,555
No one will give it a shot if they don't dig my look.
It's an image-based industry.
581
00:26:40,690 --> 00:26:44,097
What the fuck?
This is exactly why you're headed for a shitty job.
582
00:26:44,231 --> 00:26:47,763
You need to stop trying to look like
a rock star and start fucking living like one.
583
00:26:47,898 --> 00:26:48,622
Yeah, do the orgy.
584
00:26:48,622 --> 00:26:49,347
Do the orgy.
585
00:26:49,481 --> 00:26:50,972
You think Mick Jagger would have said,
586
00:26:51,106 --> 00:26:53,180
'No thanks, mate. No orgy for me.
587
00:26:53,180 --> 00:26:55,148
I've got an on-again-off-again girlfriend.'
588
00:26:55,148 --> 00:26:57,305
'I don't wanna cheat on David Bowie.'
589
00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:58,519
'No cheating on Bowie.'
590
00:26:58,519 --> 00:26:59,597
Hey, Willow.
591
00:27:00,981 --> 00:27:02,680
I know what Tom Hanks feels like now.
592
00:27:02,815 --> 00:27:04,763
See, my only concern, Duque,
593
00:27:04,898 --> 00:27:07,263
is that the hat maybe doesn't make you look gay enough.
594
00:27:07,398 --> 00:27:08,597
Oh, yeah.
595
00:27:08,731 --> 00:27:11,347
You could Photoshop in three guys jizzing on your face?
596
00:27:11,481 --> 00:27:13,930
Or on the hat?
Ooh, ooh.
597
00:27:14,065 --> 00:27:15,305
That's good.
598
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:16,440
You know, you could do,
599
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,540
You could take that five-song demo,
maybe, make it a double album.
600
00:27:18,540 --> 00:27:19,930
One with the hat, one without it?
601
00:27:19,930 --> 00:27:21,030
Yeah, that's good idea.
602
00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:22,430
You could call it <i>Exile on Hat Street.</i>
603
00:27:22,430 --> 00:27:24,130
Yeah, or <i>Jagged Little Hat?</i>
604
00:27:24,130 --> 00:27:25,730
Oh, Meat Loaf. <i>Hat Outta Hell.</i>
605
00:27:25,730 --> 00:27:28,830
What about <i>Sgt. Pepper's</i>
<i>Lonely Hats Club Hat?</i>
606
00:27:29,130 --> 00:27:30,130
What about just called it,
607
00:27:30,630 --> 00:27:32,330
"My shitty friends don't respect me?"
608
00:27:33,523 --> 00:27:34,622
Pretty Indie.
609
00:27:34,622 --> 00:27:35,722
I think, you won't be able to sell at Walmart.
610
00:27:35,856 --> 00:27:37,393
Alright, who's next up to hat?
611
00:27:37,393 --> 00:27:38,930
Two and two to Harvey Key.
612
00:27:39,065 --> 00:27:41,722
Sandy winds up and delivers.
613
00:27:44,140 --> 00:27:46,213
Fuck me!
614
00:27:44,898 --> 00:27:45,898
Hey, Ali Cat.
615
00:27:45,898 --> 00:27:46,388
Hi.
616
00:27:46,523 --> 00:27:47,763
Like what you see?
617
00:27:47,898 --> 00:27:49,972
This could be all yours Labor Day weekend.
618
00:27:50,106 --> 00:27:51,888
Oh, Eric.
619
00:27:52,023 --> 00:27:53,805
Do you mind if I make an observation?
620
00:27:53,940 --> 00:27:56,930
Oh, boy.
Sure, go ahead.
621
00:27:57,065 --> 00:27:59,055
You have intimacy issues.
622
00:27:59,148 --> 00:27:59,768
Really?
623
00:27:59,768 --> 00:28:00,388
Yeah.
624
00:28:00,523 --> 00:28:02,888
I figured an orgy is as intimate as it can get.
625
00:28:03,023 --> 00:28:05,888
No, no, no,
but intimacy isn't about intercourse, Eric.
626
00:28:06,023 --> 00:28:06,823
It's about emotion.
627
00:28:06,823 --> 00:28:07,305
Mm-hm.
628
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:10,263
You don't need to get laid.
You need to be in a relationship.
629
00:28:12,298 --> 00:28:15,698
Look, just because you're in an unhappy
relationship,
630
00:28:15,847 --> 00:28:18,247
doesn't mean the rest of us need to be.
631
00:28:17,047 --> 00:28:19,448
I'm not in an unhappy relationship.
632
00:28:19,148 --> 00:28:22,055
I'm in an adult relationship.
633
00:28:22,190 --> 00:28:23,185
It's lot a fun, whatever it is.
634
00:28:23,685 --> 00:28:24,680
Hold on one sec?
635
00:28:24,315 --> 00:28:27,388
Say, hey, Marcus.
You want to take a few cracks with the bat?
636
00:28:27,523 --> 00:28:28,523
No, thank you.
637
00:28:28,923 --> 00:28:32,223
Football is my game, European football.
638
00:28:32,223 --> 00:28:33,472
Gotcha.
639
00:28:33,606 --> 00:28:35,888
Did he date Siegfried or Roy?
I can't remember.
640
00:28:38,481 --> 00:28:41,263
God, it's embarrassing watching you play this sport.
641
00:28:41,398 --> 00:28:44,180
Aww, it's cow shit.
642
00:28:44,315 --> 00:28:47,180
Look, doc,
it's your life.
643
00:28:47,315 --> 00:28:48,722
You can do whatever you want.
644
00:28:48,815 --> 00:28:51,138
All I'm saying is that maybe Labor Day weekend
645
00:28:51,273 --> 00:28:53,597
might be the last chopper out of Saigon for you.
646
00:29:01,898 --> 00:29:04,222
Knock, knock.
Guess who.
647
00:29:04,356 --> 00:29:05,656
Dody!
648
00:29:07,315 --> 00:29:08,476
These are the Webers.
649
00:29:08,476 --> 00:29:09,638
How you doing?
650
00:29:09,538 --> 00:29:11,048
We brought some extra signs
651
00:29:11,248 --> 00:29:12,947
because someone is stealing ours.
652
00:29:12,981 --> 00:29:14,680
Oh. That's too bad.
653
00:29:15,523 --> 00:29:17,323
Oh, good. Okay.
654
00:29:17,323 --> 00:29:19,023
Hey, guys. Would you do me a favor?
655
00:29:19,223 --> 00:29:19,997
When you go in the house,
656
00:29:19,997 --> 00:29:21,297
don't go to the basement or anything.
657
00:29:21,606 --> 00:29:25,805
Not that there's anything or anyone
down there in a cage or otherwise.
658
00:29:25,940 --> 00:29:28,972
Thanks, Eric.
That's so helpful.
659
00:29:29,106 --> 00:29:30,305
What is he talking about?
660
00:29:30,398 --> 00:29:33,305
Oh, gosh. Don't worry.
Don't worry.
661
00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:36,763
He's a little off.
662
00:29:36,898 --> 00:29:38,180
It's a head injury.
663
00:29:38,315 --> 00:29:40,430
That's why he wears the helmet.
664
00:29:40,565 --> 00:29:43,097
Are they all challenged?
665
00:29:43,731 --> 00:29:46,263
Yes.
But at least they have each other.
666
00:29:46,356 --> 00:29:49,597
Oh, that's so great.
667
00:29:49,731 --> 00:29:52,305
Have fun with your game, sweetie.
668
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:53,930
Thanks, Mrs. Weber.
669
00:29:55,189 --> 00:29:58,471
We are five minutes from Indian Wells Beach.
670
00:29:58,606 --> 00:30:00,846
And wait till you see your bedroom.
671
00:30:39,023 --> 00:30:41,555
What if someone comes in?
These people never knock.
672
00:30:41,689 --> 00:30:44,138
I just locked the door.
673
00:30:44,273 --> 00:30:48,138
Fine, but you really must be quiet.
674
00:30:48,273 --> 00:30:49,638
None of your usual screeches.
675
00:30:49,773 --> 00:30:50,581
Okay, okay, okay.
676
00:30:50,581 --> 00:30:51,388
Yes?
677
00:30:51,523 --> 00:30:53,596
Yeah.
678
00:30:55,939 --> 00:30:58,513
Oh, Marcus.
Oh...
679
00:30:58,648 --> 00:31:01,180
Let's get you out of these dirty little panties.
680
00:31:01,314 --> 00:31:03,346
Do it.
What?
681
00:31:03,439 --> 00:31:06,846
What's going on? Why are you stopping?
What's going on? Hey.
682
00:31:06,981 --> 00:31:08,513
What?
683
00:31:09,148 --> 00:31:10,721
What have you done to your vagina?
684
00:31:12,314 --> 00:31:13,513
I shaved it.
685
00:31:19,481 --> 00:31:20,934
Why?
686
00:31:20,934 --> 00:31:22,388
I don't know.
687
00:31:22,523 --> 00:31:27,055
Because I thought it would be something different, sexy.
688
00:31:27,189 --> 00:31:30,805
Women are supposed to have pubic hair.
Why would I find it sexy?
689
00:31:30,939 --> 00:31:33,055
You look like a prepubescent girl.
690
00:31:33,189 --> 00:31:34,596
I'm not a child molester.
691
00:31:34,731 --> 00:31:37,805
Okay, you know what, it's hair, Marcus,
and it's gonna grow back.
692
00:31:39,106 --> 00:31:41,388
Well, I wished you would have told me
693
00:31:41,523 --> 00:31:44,055
about your little secret before I unwrapped this.
694
00:31:44,189 --> 00:31:46,638
This lambskin condoms cost 2 Euros.
695
00:31:46,773 --> 00:31:48,471
It's wasteful.
696
00:31:49,481 --> 00:31:50,680
I did it for you!
697
00:31:50,814 --> 00:31:52,805
You could have consulted with me.
698
00:31:56,439 --> 00:31:59,471
Alison, you're being like a child.
699
00:31:59,564 --> 00:32:02,055
Fuck you,
go away!
700
00:32:02,189 --> 00:32:04,138
You go away.
701
00:32:04,273 --> 00:32:05,638
I think this is chemical.
702
00:32:05,773 --> 00:32:07,638
Darling, what dosage are you taking?
703
00:32:07,773 --> 00:32:09,971
You... Fuck you!
704
00:32:10,106 --> 00:32:11,471
This is your problem.
705
00:32:11,606 --> 00:32:15,055
I was just expressing my sexuality in a healthy manner.
706
00:32:15,189 --> 00:32:19,096
God forbid, Marcus,
that we experiment a little bit.
707
00:32:19,231 --> 00:32:20,513
Fine.
708
00:32:20,648 --> 00:32:24,596
I'm going back to the city and I'm taking the iPod.
709
00:32:24,596 --> 00:32:27,148
Fine. Leave!
710
00:32:27,148 --> 00:32:29,471
And your breath is terrible!
711
00:32:29,606 --> 00:32:32,638
My breath is natural.
Unlike your vagina.
712
00:32:33,564 --> 00:32:35,138
Fuck you!
713
00:32:41,231 --> 00:32:43,680
Oh. Jesus.
714
00:32:44,564 --> 00:32:45,596
Sorry.
715
00:32:47,331 --> 00:32:48,531
It's all right.
716
00:32:51,731 --> 00:32:54,180
The worst part is I'm just peeing right now.
717
00:33:10,773 --> 00:33:12,513
I've been kicking around a few ideas.
718
00:33:12,648 --> 00:33:13,748
Themes for the party.
719
00:33:13,748 --> 00:33:14,748
Let me know what you think.
720
00:33:14,748 --> 00:33:16,448
First one, Roman, right?
721
00:33:16,448 --> 00:33:18,148
You're talking togas, wine,
722
00:33:18,148 --> 00:33:20,388
bushels of grapes,
the whole deal.
723
00:33:20,523 --> 00:33:22,429
Then I also have '70s, right?
724
00:33:22,564 --> 00:33:26,054
We got the swinger vibe, polyester,
big hair,
725
00:33:26,189 --> 00:33:29,054
upstairs and down,
you know? Um, I don't know.
726
00:33:29,189 --> 00:33:31,638
What about the Kama Sutra?
727
00:33:31,772 --> 00:33:32,496
That's actually not bad.
728
00:33:32,496 --> 00:33:33,221
Yeah?
729
00:33:33,356 --> 00:33:36,096
Yeah, yeah,
like the sex secrets of the East, right?
730
00:33:36,231 --> 00:33:37,226
Mm-hm.
731
00:33:37,226 --> 00:33:38,221
Oh, that's... Yeah.
732
00:33:38,356 --> 00:33:42,138
You know you have like, uh, incense, tapestries.
733
00:33:42,272 --> 00:33:44,472
Veils, diaphanous fabrics.
734
00:33:44,939 --> 00:33:47,721
I have no idea what the hell that is,
but I like it.
735
00:33:47,856 --> 00:33:50,054
You and me,
we're on the same page with this think.
736
00:33:50,189 --> 00:33:51,372
Right? I think so.
737
00:33:51,372 --> 00:33:52,554
Absolutely.
738
00:33:52,689 --> 00:33:54,888
How do you spell 'Kama'?
739
00:33:55,022 --> 00:33:56,513
Dude, babe alert at 3 o'clock.
740
00:33:56,647 --> 00:33:58,513
Three o'clock.
My 3, my 3.
741
00:34:03,647 --> 00:34:04,246
Wait a minute.
742
00:34:04,246 --> 00:34:04,846
That hurls my dink.
743
00:34:04,981 --> 00:34:06,346
Wait a minute. That's Kelly.
744
00:34:06,346 --> 00:34:07,726
Who?
745
00:34:07,726 --> 00:34:09,106
My Realtor.
746
00:34:09,106 --> 00:34:10,721
Oh, shit,
the enemy.
747
00:34:11,356 --> 00:34:13,096
Listen to me.
Listen.
748
00:34:13,231 --> 00:34:16,179
We cannot afford to lose the casa
de sex before Labor Day, okay?
749
00:34:16,314 --> 00:34:19,263
You go over there,
you get in tight with her, lay on the charm,
750
00:34:19,397 --> 00:34:21,346
and get her to drag ass selling the house.
751
00:34:21,481 --> 00:34:22,804
No, no,
that is... Yes, yes.
752
00:34:22,939 --> 00:34:25,263
She is a tough cookie.
She'll see through that.
753
00:34:25,397 --> 00:34:27,388
Her? Please, dude,
you're the king.
754
00:34:27,522 --> 00:34:30,846
A little winey-diney,
she'll be your humble wench servant.
755
00:34:31,772 --> 00:34:33,804
Keep friends close,
but enemies closer.
756
00:34:33,939 --> 00:34:37,263
Yeah. That doesn't make any sense.
Just go fucking charm her, okay?
757
00:34:37,564 --> 00:34:38,971
Okay.
Go, go, go.
758
00:34:39,106 --> 00:34:40,388
All right.
Do the thing.
759
00:34:40,522 --> 00:34:43,804
What? The smile thing.
Ahem.
760
00:34:44,772 --> 00:34:46,371
Kelly. Kelly.
761
00:34:46,371 --> 00:34:47,971
Hi. Oh, Eric.
762
00:34:49,647 --> 00:34:51,388
Oh, my God,
look at this. Watch.
763
00:34:51,522 --> 00:34:54,596
I hope anything I said didn't
screw anything up with the client.
764
00:34:54,731 --> 00:34:56,888
I was joking around.
I didn't freak them out?
765
00:34:57,022 --> 00:34:57,872
Oh, no. Not at all.
766
00:34:57,872 --> 00:34:58,721
Oh, good.
767
00:34:58,856 --> 00:35:01,596
You were wearing that helmet
so I was able to convince them
768
00:35:01,731 --> 00:35:04,596
that, you know,
you ride the short bus.
769
00:35:05,531 --> 00:35:07,229
Well, that's good.
770
00:35:07,364 --> 00:35:08,771
Well played.
771
00:35:08,106 --> 00:35:10,471
Hey, do you mind if...?
Maybe I can make up to you.
772
00:35:10,606 --> 00:35:12,429
Take you out to dinner or something?
773
00:35:12,564 --> 00:35:13,517
Could be fun, yeah?
774
00:35:13,517 --> 00:35:14,471
Oh, gosh, thanks.
775
00:35:14,606 --> 00:35:18,763
Um, technically,
I'm not supposed to go out with clients so..
776
00:35:18,897 --> 00:35:21,846
Well, technically my dad's the client.
777
00:35:21,981 --> 00:35:24,846
Right now I'm just some random dude on the beach.
778
00:35:24,981 --> 00:35:27,513
She's smiling. Look, she's smiling.
She's buying it.
779
00:35:27,513 --> 00:35:30,147
Okay. I'll go to dinner with you.
780
00:35:30,147 --> 00:35:31,263
All right.
781
00:35:31,397 --> 00:35:33,596
But, tell me which party we met at.
782
00:35:33,731 --> 00:35:34,830
Was it one of my parties?
783
00:35:34,830 --> 00:35:35,929
Mm-hm.
784
00:35:36,064 --> 00:35:37,721
Okay.
What, um...
785
00:35:37,856 --> 00:35:40,263
Oh, was it the Cuba Libre party because
786
00:35:40,397 --> 00:35:42,638
I was in mojito haze that whole day and I just...
787
00:35:42,772 --> 00:35:44,179
Nope.
788
00:35:44,314 --> 00:35:45,679
Oktoberfest in July?
789
00:35:45,772 --> 00:35:46,747
Nope.
790
00:35:46,747 --> 00:35:47,721
Oh, oh, no, no, I know.
791
00:35:47,856 --> 00:35:48,971
I know.
792
00:35:49,106 --> 00:35:52,388
Uh, it was the Shir Trek versus Shir
Wars Battle for the Universe Party
793
00:35:52,522 --> 00:35:55,388
and you were dressed as Obi-Wan Kenobi.
794
00:35:55,522 --> 00:35:57,888
How drunk do you get at these parties?
795
00:35:58,022 --> 00:36:00,888
Uh, pretty drunk.
It's kind of a social obligation.
796
00:36:01,022 --> 00:36:03,638
Okay.
I'm gonna give you a hint.
797
00:36:03,772 --> 00:36:05,388
I wear a size 9 shoe.
798
00:36:07,106 --> 00:36:08,846
Oh, my God.
799
00:36:08,981 --> 00:36:11,054
Oh, my God,
you're bean dip girl.
800
00:36:11,189 --> 00:36:12,205
You're bean dip girl?
801
00:36:12,605 --> 00:36:13,621
I am.
802
00:36:13,314 --> 00:36:15,471
Have you been bean dip girl the whole time?
803
00:36:15,606 --> 00:36:17,804
Oh, he's so good.
804
00:36:17,939 --> 00:36:20,054
I can't believe that.
I was gonna call you.
805
00:36:20,189 --> 00:36:21,554
I had your number on my hand
806
00:36:21,689 --> 00:36:23,596
and I jumped in the pool and it was gone.
807
00:36:23,731 --> 00:36:26,263
I thought I lost you.
I thought you were gone forever.
808
00:36:26,397 --> 00:36:27,596
And you...
809
00:36:27,731 --> 00:36:29,929
You look so much better without the fake baby.
810
00:36:30,064 --> 00:36:31,679
I actually prefer the mullet.
811
00:36:31,814 --> 00:36:33,179
Oh, I just cut it yesterday.
812
00:36:33,314 --> 00:36:34,554
Oh.
For work.
813
00:36:34,689 --> 00:36:37,721
Don't think this whole funny,
charming thing right now
814
00:36:37,856 --> 00:36:39,679
gets you off for stealing my signs.
815
00:36:39,814 --> 00:36:41,971
I don't know what you're talking about.
816
00:36:42,106 --> 00:36:44,054
I'm furious those signs are gone.
817
00:36:44,189 --> 00:36:45,679
You're lying.
I'm not lying.
818
00:36:45,814 --> 00:36:47,513
Your voice just went up.
What?
819
00:36:48,189 --> 00:36:49,513
I'm a ...
820
00:36:49,513 --> 00:36:52,147
I'm not lying. I am not lying.
821
00:36:52,147 --> 00:36:52,872
You're so lying.
822
00:36:52,872 --> 00:36:53,596
No, I'm not.
823
00:36:53,730 --> 00:36:55,637
Fucking James Bond.
Fuck.
824
00:36:56,981 --> 00:37:00,053
Wow, look at that, huh?
825
00:37:00,190 --> 00:37:03,345
Holy smokes.
Another gorgeous shot.
826
00:37:03,481 --> 00:37:04,678
Yeah, thanks.
827
00:37:06,190 --> 00:37:08,845
What should I use,
pitching wedge or nine?
828
00:37:08,940 --> 00:37:11,095
I used the nine.
829
00:37:11,398 --> 00:37:13,720
I think maybe I should use the wedge.
830
00:37:13,856 --> 00:37:15,303
Or use the wedge.
831
00:37:18,523 --> 00:37:20,595
Ugh!
Why am I like this?
832
00:37:20,731 --> 00:37:23,970
Oh, just pick a club and hit it.
What is the big deal?
833
00:37:25,065 --> 00:37:26,845
Will you do the orgy with me?
834
00:37:28,356 --> 00:37:29,886
Hey, can we play through?
835
00:37:30,023 --> 00:37:31,136
Hold on a second, man.
836
00:37:34,606 --> 00:37:35,845
The orgy
837
00:37:35,981 --> 00:37:38,136
You think that would be a good idea?
838
00:37:39,745 --> 00:37:42,548
I'm stuck.
And I think the reason is
839
00:37:42,548 --> 00:37:44,870
is because I feel like a fucking fraud.
840
00:37:45,006 --> 00:37:48,453
I'm not cool.
I have a law degree.
841
00:37:48,590 --> 00:37:51,995
I ride a motorcycle and it scares the fucking shit out of
me.
842
00:37:52,131 --> 00:37:54,578
And I play golf at my mom's fucking country club
843
00:37:55,298 --> 00:37:56,911
with assholes like this.
844
00:37:57,048 --> 00:37:59,745
What's the holdup?
Play the wedge!
845
00:38:00,215 --> 00:38:02,370
This is not rock'n'roll.
846
00:38:03,715 --> 00:38:06,161
This could be really good for me.
847
00:38:06,298 --> 00:38:08,328
For me and for us.
848
00:38:08,965 --> 00:38:11,203
Will you do the orgy with me?
849
00:38:14,006 --> 00:38:16,161
Sure, yeah, yeah, whatever. Yeah.
850
00:38:17,173 --> 00:38:18,495
Really?
851
00:38:19,381 --> 00:38:21,745
Holy shit.
Yeah.
852
00:38:23,423 --> 00:38:26,495
If you're sure this is what you want.
853
00:38:26,631 --> 00:38:29,328
Yeah, absolutely.
854
00:38:29,465 --> 00:38:30,563
Good.
855
00:38:30,563 --> 00:38:31,661
I think.
856
00:38:31,798 --> 00:38:33,911
Fore!
857
00:38:41,506 --> 00:38:43,953
So you wanna know why guys don't get as excited
858
00:38:44,090 --> 00:38:46,620
about their wedding as women do?
859
00:38:46,756 --> 00:38:50,286
See, it used to be like a guy would get
rewarded for his commitment with sex.
860
00:38:50,423 --> 00:38:53,120
But you and Glenn have had sex like a billion times.
861
00:38:53,256 --> 00:38:55,620
For God's sake,
you guys have a kid together.
862
00:38:55,756 --> 00:39:01,328
So for Glenn,
it's just kind of like all commitment, no reward.
863
00:39:01,465 --> 00:39:02,953
You know?
864
00:39:03,548 --> 00:39:06,161
I'm the fucking reward.
865
00:39:06,298 --> 00:39:07,953
Of course you are.
Of course.
866
00:39:10,340 --> 00:39:12,495
Something's wrong.
He's never late.
867
00:39:12,631 --> 00:39:14,661
Try him again.
I have been trying him.
868
00:39:14,798 --> 00:39:16,245
He's not answering his phone.
869
00:39:16,381 --> 00:39:18,995
At least he won't wear a white tuxedo like you dickheads.
870
00:39:19,715 --> 00:39:21,786
Oh, God,
that's good.
871
00:39:25,340 --> 00:39:26,745
Oh, sweet Lord in heaven.
872
00:39:26,881 --> 00:39:28,536
What the fuck,
are you stoned?
873
00:39:28,673 --> 00:39:30,911
No.
No, no, no, better.
874
00:39:31,048 --> 00:39:33,703
I'm wearing a thing called The Yank.
From Adam & Eve catalogues.
875
00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:36,745
One end straps around your leg,
the other end around your Wang.
876
00:39:36,881 --> 00:39:40,870
The brochure says, 'With every stride,
it gives your member a gentle tug.'
877
00:39:42,215 --> 00:39:45,078
What are you doing with a rope
on your cock at my wedding?
878
00:39:45,215 --> 00:39:47,161
Endurance training,
Labor Day.
879
00:39:48,098 --> 00:39:48,498
For what?
880
00:39:48,498 --> 00:39:49,798
A jack-off marathon?
881
00:39:50,923 --> 00:39:53,161
What?
Uh, yeah.
882
00:39:53,298 --> 00:39:55,953
That's exactly it.
You nailed it. Heh, heh.
883
00:39:56,090 --> 00:39:57,786
Hey, check it out.
Look who's here.
884
00:39:57,923 --> 00:40:00,745
Oh, fantastic.
Another asshole in white tails.
885
00:40:00,881 --> 00:40:03,203
Keep the change, man.
886
00:40:04,298 --> 00:40:06,036
Ha-ha-ha.
Oh, my God.
887
00:40:07,381 --> 00:40:08,870
Well, well, well.
Look at you.
888
00:40:09,006 --> 00:40:12,578
You're late, you're in costume,
and you appear to be hammered.
889
00:40:12,715 --> 00:40:13,911
Who the hell are you?
890
00:40:14,048 --> 00:40:16,203
Long story.
I got fired.
891
00:40:16,340 --> 00:40:17,536
What?
892
00:40:17,673 --> 00:40:21,203
It had more to do with the fact that I
almost blew a $2 billion merger deal
893
00:40:21,339 --> 00:40:24,739
because some bozo jumped into the pool
with my blackberry.
894
00:40:24,739 --> 00:40:26,639
Oh, shit. Dude.
895
00:40:26,639 --> 00:40:28,703
I spent most of last night crying and drinking
896
00:40:28,839 --> 00:40:32,703
and then I drunk-dialed my mom.
She kind of talked me down.
897
00:40:32,839 --> 00:40:34,536
Then I woke up this morning,
898
00:40:34,673 --> 00:40:37,828
had a little more to drink and I realized,
you know what?
899
00:40:37,964 --> 00:40:40,036
This is good.
I'm free.
900
00:40:40,173 --> 00:40:41,494
Adam, I'm so sorry.
901
00:40:41,631 --> 00:40:43,578
Shh, shh, shush.
You're my friend.
902
00:40:43,714 --> 00:40:45,661
No, they took my twenties from me.
903
00:40:45,798 --> 00:40:48,869
And I plan to make my thirties making up for it.
904
00:40:49,008 --> 00:40:50,659
And you know what else?
905
00:40:50,659 --> 00:40:53,925
I'm doing the orgy. Fuck it.
906
00:40:53,925 --> 00:40:54,992
Orgy?
907
00:40:55,133 --> 00:40:56,742
What orgy?
908
00:40:56,883 --> 00:40:58,534
The fuck are you talking about?
909
00:40:58,534 --> 00:41:01,550
See, this is exactly why we should have told him, Eric.
910
00:41:01,550 --> 00:41:02,867
Told me what?
911
00:41:03,008 --> 00:41:05,159
That's what we're doing for Labor Day.
An orgy.
912
00:41:05,300 --> 00:41:07,909
Bullshit.
Who's having an orgy?
913
00:41:08,050 --> 00:41:10,367
It's me, Willow,
these two fellas,
914
00:41:10,508 --> 00:41:12,867
Laura, Sue,
now drunkie.
915
00:41:13,008 --> 00:41:14,159
Waiting on Alison.
916
00:41:14,300 --> 00:41:16,326
Jesus H.
Fucking Christ.
917
00:41:16,425 --> 00:41:19,326
How come you cocksuckers didn't
think of this fucking orgy idea
918
00:41:19,466 --> 00:41:21,784
five fucking years ago?
God damn it!
919
00:41:21,925 --> 00:41:23,992
Ahem.
Uh, Glenn.
920
00:41:24,133 --> 00:41:26,826
I'm afraid we're gonna have to start without your friend.
921
00:41:26,966 --> 00:41:28,242
Oh, he's here.
He's, uh...
922
00:41:28,550 --> 00:41:29,438
Hi, Rabbi.
923
00:41:30,925 --> 00:41:32,326
Pardon my French.
924
00:41:36,550 --> 00:41:37,742
All right, everybody.
925
00:41:37,742 --> 00:41:40,550
Introducing for the very first time,
926
00:41:40,550 --> 00:41:42,992
Mr. and Mrs. Glenn Pasillio.
927
00:41:44,466 --> 00:41:46,000
Paciello!
928
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:47,534
Paciellio.
929
00:41:53,925 --> 00:41:55,076
Here we go.
930
00:41:56,925 --> 00:41:58,117
I am married.
931
00:42:03,742 --> 00:42:08,550
I can't believe that you guys broke up because you shaved.
932
00:42:06,550 --> 00:42:08,492
He's the weirdest,
creepiest guy ever.
933
00:42:08,633 --> 00:42:10,326
Here you are, ladies.
934
00:42:10,466 --> 00:42:12,909
You guys are definitely broken up this time, right?
935
00:42:16,216 --> 00:42:17,617
Fuck relationships.
936
00:42:17,758 --> 00:42:21,576
Right now,
all I wanna do is have some fun.
937
00:42:47,633 --> 00:42:49,492
Labor Day.
938
00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:51,867
I'm in.
939
00:42:51,508 --> 00:42:53,367
Yes.
Yes.
940
00:42:53,508 --> 00:42:55,201
Oh, and I'm fully shaved.
941
00:42:57,008 --> 00:42:57,938
Alison!
942
00:42:57,938 --> 00:42:58,867
Oh, no, no, no.
943
00:42:59,008 --> 00:43:01,034
I'm not making a speech.
944
00:43:01,175 --> 00:43:04,367
Sorry about that. It's, uh,
private conversation.
945
00:43:07,550 --> 00:43:11,034
You know what they're doing over Labor Day?
Do you know what the party is?
946
00:43:11,175 --> 00:43:12,284
What?
947
00:43:12,425 --> 00:43:14,867
They're having a fucking orgy.
948
00:43:16,008 --> 00:43:18,242
What are you talking about?
949
00:43:17,383 --> 00:43:19,951
They are having an orgy.
950
00:43:20,758 --> 00:43:21,909
Like a sex orgy?
951
00:43:22,050 --> 00:43:24,159
Like a sex orgy and we're not invited.
952
00:43:27,966 --> 00:43:29,367
Hey.
Hi.
953
00:43:29,508 --> 00:43:30,909
So is it true?
954
00:43:31,050 --> 00:43:33,284
That all of you are having this orgy
955
00:43:33,425 --> 00:43:35,326
and you didn't think to invite us?
956
00:43:37,466 --> 00:43:40,367
What are you all looking at me for?
I...
957
00:43:40,508 --> 00:43:43,076
Guys, you just got married, okay?
958
00:43:43,216 --> 00:43:45,201
L... You have a kid.
You don't...
959
00:43:45,341 --> 00:43:47,659
Don't you think it's a little inappropriate?
960
00:43:47,799 --> 00:43:49,492
Well, of course we wouldn't come.
961
00:43:49,633 --> 00:43:52,492
It's that you didn't ask us.
You didn't even think of us.
962
00:43:52,633 --> 00:43:55,075
In fact,
you specifically hid this from us.
963
00:43:55,216 --> 00:43:57,200
We invited all you to be here today,
964
00:43:57,341 --> 00:43:59,700
just the most special day of our lives,
965
00:43:59,841 --> 00:44:03,742
and you,
who are supposed to be our closest friends...
966
00:44:03,883 --> 00:44:06,950
There were family members who
didn't get invited so you could come.
967
00:44:07,091 --> 00:44:07,688
Family members.
968
00:44:07,688 --> 00:44:08,284
Right.
969
00:44:09,091 --> 00:44:12,867
Now, we're just totally out of your pervy little social club.
Huh?
970
00:44:13,966 --> 00:44:15,117
I don't believe this.
971
00:44:21,591 --> 00:44:23,784
Sorry.
Are you happy?
972
00:44:25,383 --> 00:44:28,784
Because you and your stupid orgy
just ruined our goddamn wedding.
973
00:44:28,924 --> 00:44:29,958
Oh, come on, Glenn.
974
00:44:29,958 --> 00:44:30,992
Kate!
975
00:44:31,258 --> 00:44:32,958
Is it too late to invite them?
976
00:44:32,958 --> 00:44:33,784
I'll go talk to her.
977
00:44:33,924 --> 00:44:34,992
No!
978
00:44:35,133 --> 00:44:36,104
Are you kidding me?
979
00:44:36,104 --> 00:44:37,075
Guys, it's Katie.
980
00:44:37,216 --> 00:44:38,867
She's gonna be fine in like an hour.
981
00:44:39,708 --> 00:44:41,484
I just realized I'm really hammered
982
00:44:40,924 --> 00:44:43,034
and I would really like to dance.
983
00:44:43,174 --> 00:44:44,534
I'm dancing too.
984
00:44:44,674 --> 00:44:47,450
This reminds me of our senior prom.
985
00:44:47,591 --> 00:44:49,617
You still won't give me a hand job, right?
986
00:45:10,549 --> 00:45:14,649
It's amazing that you're still so
tight with all your high school friends.
987
00:45:14,649 --> 00:45:16,246
None of mine moved back after college.
988
00:45:16,379 --> 00:45:19,246
Yeah, it's a, uh... I don't know,
it's maybe corny to say,
989
00:45:19,379 --> 00:45:21,288
but these guys and gals are kind of like
990
00:45:21,420 --> 00:45:23,954
the closest thing I've got to a family these days.
991
00:45:24,087 --> 00:45:27,246
That's why the house, the summer house,
it's like our rec center.
992
00:45:27,712 --> 00:45:30,038
I think we're getting an offer on the rec center.
993
00:45:31,376 --> 00:45:32,776
My dad will be thrilled.
994
00:45:32,792 --> 00:45:33,499
I knew it.
995
00:45:33,499 --> 00:45:34,207
What?
996
00:45:34,334 --> 00:45:36,791
I knew it wasn't a family decision to sell the house.
997
00:45:36,917 --> 00:45:40,249
No.
We're not big into family decisions any more.
998
00:45:40,376 --> 00:45:42,666
My mom,
she lives in Portland, Oregon,
999
00:45:42,792 --> 00:45:45,957
with this, uh,
Reiki healer asshole.
1000
00:45:46,084 --> 00:45:47,416
Tell me exactly how you feel.
1001
00:45:47,416 --> 00:45:48,749
Oh, he's good. He's good.
1002
00:45:48,876 --> 00:45:51,499
Uh, no,
she's kind of out of the picture.
1003
00:45:51,626 --> 00:45:54,249
Her doing. Um, yeah,
it's just me and my dad.
1004
00:45:54,376 --> 00:45:57,576
Hm, well,
your dad seems like a fun guy.
1005
00:45:58,207 --> 00:46:00,542
Yeah, yeah, he's very fun. He's a hoot.
1006
00:46:01,542 --> 00:46:04,374
Kind of like being raised by an older fraternity brother.
1007
00:46:04,501 --> 00:46:05,792
He hit on me a little bit.
1008
00:46:05,792 --> 00:46:07,082
No.
1009
00:46:07,209 --> 00:46:08,291
He ask you to play golf?
1010
00:46:08,291 --> 00:46:09,374
Yes.
1011
00:46:09,501 --> 00:46:11,832
That's his move.
He's very good at golf. Very good.
1012
00:46:11,959 --> 00:46:15,166
But he did it right in front of Cherie and she had no idea.
1013
00:46:15,292 --> 00:46:16,874
Neither did my mom for a while.
1014
00:46:17,209 --> 00:46:19,166
Now if you will excuse me, Oh.
1015
00:46:19,292 --> 00:46:21,249
I have to win this game if you don't mind.
1016
00:46:21,376 --> 00:46:22,750
Does this make you...?
1017
00:46:22,750 --> 00:46:24,124
It's a little distracting.
1018
00:46:24,251 --> 00:46:25,250
That's not distracting at all.
1019
00:46:25,250 --> 00:46:26,249
Oh! Jesus.
1020
00:46:26,376 --> 00:46:28,749
I lied.
It was a little distracting.
1021
00:46:28,876 --> 00:46:30,082
Help.
1022
00:46:32,959 --> 00:46:36,124
Fred's Beds?
Are you sure this is the right place?
1023
00:46:36,459 --> 00:46:40,207
Yeah. What do you they gonna do,
putting sign on underground sex club?
1024
00:46:40,834 --> 00:46:42,499
He said come in through the warehouse entrance.
1025
00:46:43,334 --> 00:46:44,541
Hey, you got rubbers on you?
1026
00:46:44,667 --> 00:46:45,208
No!
1027
00:46:45,208 --> 00:46:45,749
What?
1028
00:46:45,749 --> 00:46:46,349
No, no, no.
1029
00:46:46,349 --> 00:46:47,874
We are here strictly to observe.
That is all.
1030
00:46:48,001 --> 00:46:49,901
Dude, it's a sex club. <i>Semper fi.</i>
1031
00:46:49,901 --> 00:46:51,646
Always prepared.
You know what I mean?
1032
00:46:51,646 --> 00:46:53,041
Doesn't that mean 'always faithful'?
1033
00:46:53,167 --> 00:46:55,291
Hey, who took Latin in seventh grade?
1034
00:46:55,417 --> 00:46:56,417
Moi, okay?
1035
00:46:57,517 --> 00:46:59,807
I brought a pack with me if you need one.
1036
00:46:58,834 --> 00:46:59,770
Give me the signal.
1037
00:46:59,770 --> 00:47:00,707
I won't need one.
1038
00:47:00,707 --> 00:47:01,307
Altoid?
1039
00:47:01,307 --> 00:47:02,007
Yeah.
1040
00:47:07,001 --> 00:47:08,082
What do you want?
1041
00:47:08,082 --> 00:47:09,482
The password is chandelier.
1042
00:47:13,142 --> 00:47:13,942
Who's your connection?
1043
00:47:13,942 --> 00:47:15,142
Vic George, friend of my uncle's.
1044
00:47:15,142 --> 00:47:17,242
Oh yeah. He told me to expect you.
1045
00:47:17,242 --> 00:47:18,242
Come on in.
1046
00:47:22,225 --> 00:47:25,099
So welcome to the Paradiso.
1047
00:47:29,309 --> 00:47:30,209
What the fuck?
1048
00:47:30,209 --> 00:47:31,609
I, I don't know.
1049
00:47:32,292 --> 00:47:33,292
Can I take your clothes?
1050
00:47:33,292 --> 00:47:33,892
No.
1051
00:47:33,892 --> 00:47:34,492
You sure?
1052
00:47:34,492 --> 00:47:35,124
Good, we're good.
1053
00:47:35,250 --> 00:47:35,950
Okay, follow me.
1054
00:47:35,950 --> 00:47:36,550
Yeah.
1055
00:47:37,550 --> 00:47:38,450
This is Bill.
1056
00:47:39,875 --> 00:47:41,075
That was a panda.
1057
00:47:41,075 --> 00:47:42,475
Go easy on that thing.
1058
00:47:42,475 --> 00:47:44,275
Didi, Ginger.
1059
00:47:45,982 --> 00:47:47,942
Clambake.
1060
00:47:47,442 --> 00:47:48,959
This group right here.
1061
00:47:49,459 --> 00:47:52,499
Get in the swing, rock your world.
1062
00:47:52,667 --> 00:47:53,567
My grandma has that thing.
1063
00:47:54,067 --> 00:47:56,467
You need anything,
just ask for Fred.
1064
00:47:56,467 --> 00:47:57,367
Oh, Fred's Beds?
1065
00:47:57,367 --> 00:47:58,567
Oh no, that's a different Fred.
1066
00:47:58,567 --> 00:47:59,767
I'm a dentist.
1067
00:47:59,967 --> 00:48:03,132
Vic, he is over there in the futon section.
All right?
1068
00:48:02,559 --> 00:48:03,162
Okay.
1069
00:48:03,162 --> 00:48:03,765
Have a good time.
1070
00:48:03,892 --> 00:48:04,433
Thank you.
1071
00:48:04,433 --> 00:48:04,974
Thanks, Dr. Fred.
1072
00:48:06,392 --> 00:48:07,992
Should've had this guy at the wedding.
1073
00:48:10,334 --> 00:48:11,707
Love the new <i>Price is Right</i>.
1074
00:48:12,707 --> 00:48:13,943
There he is, there he is.
1075
00:48:13,943 --> 00:48:15,180
Oh my god.
1076
00:48:15,180 --> 00:48:17,020
Hey, Mikey!
1077
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:18,320
Little McCrudden.
1078
00:48:18,502 --> 00:48:21,102
Holy shit,
you've grown.
1079
00:48:21,102 --> 00:48:21,661
How you doing, baby?
1080
00:48:21,661 --> 00:48:22,220
Good, good.
1081
00:48:24,502 --> 00:48:25,711
How's your folks?
1082
00:48:25,711 --> 00:48:26,920
Good, they're on a cruise
1083
00:48:27,180 --> 00:48:28,780
Mom got her pound cake recipe published.
1084
00:48:28,780 --> 00:48:30,250
This is my buddy Eric.
1085
00:48:30,250 --> 00:48:31,320
Eric, Vic.
1086
00:48:31,280 --> 00:48:32,720
First time at the Paradise, ha? Eh, boys?
1087
00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:35,920
Come on, guys,
take off the clothes and get fucking.
1088
00:48:36,180 --> 00:48:39,820
No. No fucking. No. Actually, no,
no. We're here more doing research
1089
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,120
than anything else.
We're gonna throw an orgy.
1090
00:48:42,180 --> 00:48:43,720
We were hoping we can get a little advice from you.
1091
00:48:44,502 --> 00:48:45,720
Just let me finish up here.
1092
00:48:45,720 --> 00:48:46,520
No rush. Take your time.
1093
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:47,420
No, you can rush if you want.
1094
00:48:47,420 --> 00:48:48,420
You rush a little.
1095
00:48:49,002 --> 00:48:51,002
Not much longer guys,
Hang in will you.
1096
00:48:53,380 --> 00:48:54,280
Look at me, not her.
1097
00:48:54,780 --> 00:48:55,480
Look at me!
1098
00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:56,520
I'm not gonna look at him.
1099
00:48:56,980 --> 00:48:58,720
Do me a favor,
count me down.
1100
00:48:59,980 --> 00:49:01,980
Five, four, three...
1101
00:49:02,280 --> 00:49:02,880
Go back to 10!
1102
00:49:03,380 --> 00:49:04,380
Ten, nine, eight...
1103
00:49:04,380 --> 00:49:07,080
Oh! Your mom's a good woman.
1104
00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:10,080
You're little early on that one.
1105
00:49:14,980 --> 00:49:16,620
Holy shit,
I got a second one.
1106
00:49:17,102 --> 00:49:19,720
So Vic, we could really use your expertise.
1107
00:49:20,680 --> 00:49:22,720
How do we make sure that the women are into it?
1108
00:49:23,280 --> 00:49:26,420
Don't worry about the women,
worry about you guys.
1109
00:49:26,780 --> 00:49:28,720
Okay, so how do we make it happen, Vic?
1110
00:49:29,180 --> 00:49:30,720
Just because you have a bunch
of naked people in the room
1111
00:49:30,780 --> 00:49:32,920
doesn't mean you're all going to get it on.
1112
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:35,220
Sometimes a girl just wants to have a heart-to-heart,
1113
00:49:35,880 --> 00:49:37,320
and she ends up pulling a train.
1114
00:49:38,480 --> 00:49:39,520
Pulling a train?
1115
00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:41,980
Mm, yeah, you know.
1116
00:49:48,580 --> 00:49:50,020
Choo-choo train.
1117
00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:51,820
Here's another thing.
1118
00:49:51,880 --> 00:49:54,420
Every wolf pack has a leader.
I take it you're the lead wolf?
1119
00:49:54,415 --> 00:49:55,065
Fucking A.
1120
00:49:55,065 --> 00:49:58,020
Uh, yes. I guess so. Yes.
1121
00:49:59,102 --> 00:50:02,120
Well, then it's all on your shoulders.
1122
00:50:02,180 --> 00:50:05,420
If you don't run,
nobody behind you can run.
1123
00:50:05,880 --> 00:50:06,950
Oh, that's good.
1124
00:50:06,950 --> 00:50:08,020
What does that mean? What do I do?
1125
00:50:08,480 --> 00:50:10,220
You have to get naked.
1126
00:50:11,680 --> 00:50:16,120
You've got get naked in your mind,
in your heart, in your soul.
1127
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:19,220
You've got be honest with yourself
and everybody else
1128
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:23,020
about what you want.
If you're a pegger, be honest about that.
1129
00:50:23,480 --> 00:50:24,820
What is a pegger?
1130
00:50:25,380 --> 00:50:27,220
Chick fucks a dude up the ass with a strap-on.
1131
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:31,520
Not really my bag,
but like I always say,
1132
00:50:31,880 --> 00:50:33,520
I'm willing to try anything twice.
1133
00:50:38,280 --> 00:50:39,050
Hello, senator.
1134
00:50:39,050 --> 00:50:39,820
Hello.
1135
00:50:41,780 --> 00:50:43,720
This is a lot to process.
1136
00:50:44,780 --> 00:50:46,120
You listen to me.
1137
00:50:46,780 --> 00:50:49,320
You can't force it and you can't fake it.
1138
00:50:50,580 --> 00:50:55,720
So you better cut the bullshit,
nut up, and be a man.
1139
00:50:58,380 --> 00:50:59,620
Now if you'll excuse me,
1140
00:50:59,680 --> 00:51:02,220
I feel the blood rushing back to my sword.
1141
00:51:02,980 --> 00:51:04,320
I noticed that.
1142
00:51:06,380 --> 00:51:08,620
Well, hey, Vic, thank you.
This is all good stuff.
1143
00:51:08,880 --> 00:51:09,600
Good advice.
1144
00:51:09,600 --> 00:51:10,320
Yeah. Good.
Thank you.
1145
00:51:10,780 --> 00:51:12,220
My pleasure, guys.
1146
00:51:12,780 --> 00:51:14,520
Oh there, watch that thing.
1147
00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:16,420
Good luck.
1148
00:51:17,380 --> 00:51:19,820
Okay. We should probably leave now.
1149
00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:22,150
Don't eat anything here.
1150
00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:23,050
You son of a bitch.
1151
00:51:23,050 --> 00:51:23,620
Don't!
1152
00:51:29,880 --> 00:51:30,880
Holy shit, is that...?
1153
00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:31,480
Yeah, yeah, keep going.
1154
00:51:31,480 --> 00:51:32,620
Don't let her see you.
1155
00:51:34,658 --> 00:51:36,958
Oh. Man, oh, man. All right.
1156
00:51:36,958 --> 00:51:37,558
That was good?
1157
00:51:37,558 --> 00:51:38,990
That was good.
That was pretty good.
1158
00:51:39,117 --> 00:51:40,282
Yeah, okay,
here we go.
1159
00:51:40,282 --> 00:51:40,882
You ready?
1160
00:51:40,882 --> 00:51:41,882
Showtime.
1161
00:51:44,742 --> 00:51:45,492
Shit!
1162
00:51:45,992 --> 00:51:46,792
I'm gonna count that.
1163
00:51:46,792 --> 00:51:47,392
Okay.
1164
00:51:47,392 --> 00:51:48,252
I'm gonna count that there.
1165
00:51:48,252 --> 00:51:48,922
Okay.
1166
00:51:49,542 --> 00:51:52,102
.. yeah, it's juvenile.
I've been meaning to ask you something.
1167
00:51:52,102 --> 00:51:52,662
What?
1168
00:51:52,662 --> 00:51:54,957
What's Dody like as a boss?
1169
00:51:55,083 --> 00:51:58,748
She just seems like she could be a little,
you know, domineering.
1170
00:51:58,875 --> 00:52:02,665
Oh, my gosh, no. I mean,
she's not what you think, you know.
1171
00:52:02,792 --> 00:52:05,123
I mean, of course,
at work she's all business,
1172
00:52:05,250 --> 00:52:07,582
but, Eric,
she has traveled the world.
1173
00:52:07,708 --> 00:52:09,998
She speaks all these languages.
1174
00:52:10,125 --> 00:52:12,623
She's just full of surprises.
1175
00:52:12,750 --> 00:52:14,332
Oh, I bet she is.
1176
00:52:14,458 --> 00:52:16,582
I bet she's been places I can only imagine.
1177
00:52:16,875 --> 00:52:19,748
So, like,
now that you're super into me...
1178
00:52:21,375 --> 00:52:24,165
No, there's something I actually have to tell you.
1179
00:52:24,292 --> 00:52:25,041
Sincerely I, um...
1180
00:52:25,041 --> 00:52:25,790
Really?
1181
00:52:25,917 --> 00:52:27,915
Yeah, I kind of misled you. Uh...
1182
00:52:28,042 --> 00:52:32,957
What you saw today was not an actual
representation of my Frisbee golf skills.
1183
00:52:33,083 --> 00:52:35,248
Yeah.
I let you win.
1184
00:52:35,375 --> 00:52:36,229
Really?
1185
00:52:36,229 --> 00:52:37,082
Yeah.
1186
00:52:37,208 --> 00:52:39,248
So I want a rematch.
Like, big time.
1187
00:52:40,083 --> 00:52:42,582
Or you could just stick to sucking at pool.
1188
00:52:43,208 --> 00:52:44,748
Ooh.
1189
00:52:44,875 --> 00:52:45,675
Sss!
1190
00:52:45,675 --> 00:52:47,082
Oh.
1191
00:52:52,250 --> 00:52:53,540
One more.
1192
00:52:53,667 --> 00:52:54,217
That's it, though.
1193
00:52:54,217 --> 00:52:54,817
No.
1194
00:52:55,042 --> 00:52:57,165
That was the last one.
That's for the road.
1195
00:52:57,250 --> 00:52:58,373
I will call you.
1196
00:52:58,708 --> 00:52:59,408
Okay.
1197
00:52:59,408 --> 00:53:00,258
All right.
1198
00:53:00,658 --> 00:53:01,508
See you!
1199
00:53:02,008 --> 00:53:03,708
Hey! Umm..
1200
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:06,373
What are you doing for Labor Day?
1201
00:53:07,375 --> 00:53:09,832
Oh, yeah. Is that...?
Yeah, Labor Day.
1202
00:53:09,958 --> 00:53:11,790
Um, you know what?
1203
00:53:11,917 --> 00:53:14,665
The guys and the crew,
we're all gonna, um...
1204
00:53:14,792 --> 00:53:16,707
We're doing this small little thing,
1205
00:53:16,833 --> 00:53:19,373
this intimate little thing.
Nothing... Nothing special.
1206
00:53:19,500 --> 00:53:22,040
Well, I was thinking that maybe,
you know,
1207
00:53:22,167 --> 00:53:24,873
your friends and my friends could get together.
1208
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:26,290
Yeah.
1209
00:53:26,417 --> 00:53:27,317
Oh, that sounds great.
1210
00:53:27,317 --> 00:53:27,873
Yeah?
1211
00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:29,957
Yeah, we should definitely look into that,
maybe.
1212
00:53:30,083 --> 00:53:31,540
Yeah.
It'd be fun.
1213
00:53:31,667 --> 00:53:34,457
But, so, wait, Eric, is that...?
Is that a maybe?
1214
00:53:34,583 --> 00:53:37,707
Yeah, it's a maybe. It's a definite maybe.
It's a hard, hard maybe.
1215
00:53:37,833 --> 00:53:39,915
We should definitely think about doing that.
1216
00:53:40,042 --> 00:53:42,332
Let's lock it in as a possibility.
1217
00:53:42,458 --> 00:53:43,707
Okay.
1218
00:53:43,833 --> 00:53:46,123
I'll call you about it.
1219
00:53:46,123 --> 00:53:47,542
Or write you.
1220
00:53:47,542 --> 00:53:49,373
Heh, okay.
1221
00:53:49,500 --> 00:53:51,500
Carrier pigeon. Something.
I'll get a hold of you.
1222
00:53:51,500 --> 00:53:52,832
Okay, Good night, Eric.
1223
00:53:52,832 --> 00:53:53,707
Good night, Kelly.
1224
00:54:12,667 --> 00:54:13,791
What are you doing up?
1225
00:54:13,791 --> 00:54:14,915
Oh, I never went down.
1226
00:54:15,042 --> 00:54:18,540
Stayed up drinking with a dude from
Blues Traveler in the Talkhouse parking lot.
1227
00:54:18,667 --> 00:54:22,873
Like an hour ago,
fucking dude says the bubonic plague is back.
1228
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:25,290
Great.
Another thing to worry about.
1229
00:54:26,833 --> 00:54:28,457
What are you doing up?
1230
00:54:28,792 --> 00:54:31,332
I got a bit of a situation.
1231
00:54:31,458 --> 00:54:33,290
Hit me.
1232
00:54:33,417 --> 00:54:37,123
Okay, but first off,
you can't tell anyone.
1233
00:54:37,250 --> 00:54:39,082
Dude, look who you're talking to.
1234
00:54:39,208 --> 00:54:40,103
It's the vault.
1235
00:54:40,103 --> 00:54:40,998
Seriously.
1236
00:54:41,125 --> 00:54:43,540
A lot of people tell people you can't tell someone,
1237
00:54:43,667 --> 00:54:46,623
and those people go and tell someone.
That cannot happen this time.
1238
00:54:46,750 --> 00:54:49,123
Hey!
You tell no one.
1239
00:54:49,250 --> 00:54:50,956
Not even Rodrigo?
1240
00:54:51,083 --> 00:54:54,456
Why would you tell a 50-year-old
Guatemalan landscaper about my life?
1241
00:54:54,583 --> 00:54:57,165
Because he's a good sounding board, okay?
1242
00:54:57,291 --> 00:55:00,498
But if you're gonna get all weird about it,
I won't tell Rodrigo.
1243
00:55:00,625 --> 00:55:02,665
I appreciate it.
1244
00:55:03,541 --> 00:55:05,498
I went on a date last night.
1245
00:55:05,625 --> 00:55:06,915
So far,
so good.
1246
00:55:07,041 --> 00:55:08,123
With the Realtor chick.
1247
00:55:09,083 --> 00:55:10,623
Dody Henderson?
Did she peg you?
1248
00:55:10,750 --> 00:55:13,581
No, not Dody.
I went out with Kelly.
1249
00:55:13,708 --> 00:55:14,915
Oh, thank the Lord.
1250
00:55:15,041 --> 00:55:17,081
I felt bad for your butt hole for a minute.
1251
00:55:17,208 --> 00:55:17,749
Heh, heh.
1252
00:55:17,749 --> 00:55:18,290
Yeah.
1253
00:55:18,416 --> 00:55:22,665
Yeah, and I think we've got a problem because
1254
00:55:23,541 --> 00:55:25,248
I really kind of dig her now.
1255
00:55:26,875 --> 00:55:29,248
I don't know what to do about the orgy situation.
1256
00:55:29,375 --> 00:55:30,790
Are you fucking with me right now?
1257
00:55:30,916 --> 00:55:33,081
I know.
What are the odds?
1258
00:55:33,208 --> 00:55:34,998
I mean, seriously,
I'm smack dab
1259
00:55:35,125 --> 00:55:36,831
in the middle of organizing an orgy.
1260
00:55:36,958 --> 00:55:37,645
Orgy, yeah.
1261
00:55:37,645 --> 00:55:38,331
Yes. Yeah.
1262
00:55:38,458 --> 00:55:41,358
And I meet the first girl in a long time that
1263
00:55:41,358 --> 00:55:43,623
I can see myself having a relationship with.
1264
00:55:44,633 --> 00:55:47,256
I got tell her about the orgy right?
1265
00:55:46,583 --> 00:55:48,540
What?
Ha-ha-ha!
1266
00:55:48,666 --> 00:55:51,040
No. No.
It's so stupid.
1267
00:55:51,166 --> 00:55:53,456
No. Listen to me.
No, no.
1268
00:55:53,583 --> 00:55:57,123
You don't ever, ever,
ever tell her about our little soiree here.
1269
00:55:57,250 --> 00:55:58,706
Ever.
1270
00:55:58,833 --> 00:56:00,373
Have you perked her yet?
1271
00:56:00,500 --> 00:56:02,873
Oh, goddamn it, Mike.
I hate when you say stuff.
1272
00:56:03,000 --> 00:56:05,081
No.
No, we've kissed.
1273
00:56:05,208 --> 00:56:06,956
Kissed, good.
Okay, good.
1274
00:56:07,083 --> 00:56:09,540
Keep it PG until after Labor Day, okay?
1275
00:56:09,666 --> 00:56:13,081
As long as you haven't had the exclusivity talk,
and you're not currently boning...
1276
00:56:13,208 --> 00:56:13,808
Yeah, I know.
1277
00:56:13,808 --> 00:56:15,040
Then you, my friend,
1278
00:56:15,166 --> 00:56:16,373
are a free agent.
1279
00:56:16,500 --> 00:56:18,498
Mm, I don't know, dude.
1280
00:56:18,625 --> 00:56:22,706
Listen to me.
You do not know what or who
1281
00:56:22,833 --> 00:56:24,748
she's been doing in her free time, ace.
1282
00:56:24,875 --> 00:56:28,081
So just keep it in your pants until <i>apres</i>
Labor Day
1283
00:56:28,208 --> 00:56:29,873
and then it'll just be this crazy,
1284
00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:33,165
wet, vivid, erotic
1285
00:56:33,291 --> 00:56:36,665
sexual misadventure in your past
1286
00:56:36,791 --> 00:56:39,665
that you never have to tell her about.
1287
00:56:43,958 --> 00:56:45,040
Okay...
1288
00:56:45,166 --> 00:56:46,066
Okay?
1289
00:56:46,066 --> 00:56:47,266
All right, that's the plan.
1290
00:56:47,266 --> 00:56:50,541
Thank you. That was oddly helpful.
1291
00:56:50,541 --> 00:56:53,498
I am not just a pretty face.
1292
00:56:54,833 --> 00:56:56,248
Oof, ma goof.
1293
00:56:56,375 --> 00:56:58,456
Daddy really needs to get in shape.
1294
00:56:58,583 --> 00:57:00,665
Oh, I'm with you.
I may even cut out curbs,
1295
00:57:00,791 --> 00:57:03,248
except for pizza and sandwiches, obviously.
1296
00:57:03,916 --> 00:57:07,790
Are you guys worried at all about
performing in front of everyone else?
1297
00:57:08,458 --> 00:57:10,498
Look, it's not a race.
1298
00:57:10,625 --> 00:57:12,706
Well, assuming that we can all get wood,
1299
00:57:12,833 --> 00:57:14,623
one of us will have the smallest dick.
1300
00:57:14,750 --> 00:57:17,665
And I, for one,
do not wanna have the smallest dick.
1301
00:57:17,791 --> 00:57:18,873
Okay.
Two things.
1302
00:57:19,000 --> 00:57:22,623
First off, the ladies are gonna be too concerned
about their bodies to think about yours.
1303
00:57:22,750 --> 00:57:25,123
And secondly,
that's all myth.
1304
00:57:26,000 --> 00:57:27,790
Women do not care about penis size.
1305
00:57:27,916 --> 00:57:30,373
Who do you think has the biggest dick?
1306
00:57:30,500 --> 00:57:31,623
I think I know.
1307
00:57:32,375 --> 00:57:35,456
Boom. Ah! You're next, Uncle Addie.
1308
00:57:35,456 --> 00:57:37,541
Whoa. Whoa, whoa.
1309
00:57:37,541 --> 00:57:40,331
No one fucking said anything
about giving any fucking blood.
1310
00:57:40,458 --> 00:57:40,908
Oops.
1311
00:57:40,908 --> 00:57:41,790
And can someone explain to me
1312
00:57:41,916 --> 00:57:45,956
why they need to puncture your vein to find
out if there's a problem with your shvantz?
1313
00:57:46,083 --> 00:57:48,373
Summer after freshman year,
1314
00:57:48,500 --> 00:57:49,000
Yeah?
1315
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:52,456
I walked in on one of the guys
1316
00:57:52,583 --> 00:57:54,540
whacking off.
1317
00:57:54,666 --> 00:57:55,749
Shut up. Who?
1318
00:57:55,749 --> 00:57:56,831
I won't say.
1319
00:57:56,958 --> 00:57:58,373
No, no, no, who?
Who? Who?
1320
00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:04,123
I'm not gonna tell you,
but I will say that it was a monster.
1321
00:58:04,250 --> 00:58:06,956
Hey.
That is my blood.
1322
00:58:07,083 --> 00:58:08,581
That used to be inside you.
1323
00:58:08,708 --> 00:58:09,831
I'm gonna lie down.
1324
00:58:09,958 --> 00:58:11,623
What?
Duquez, Duquez!
1325
00:58:11,750 --> 00:58:13,748
You got give us ballpark... Right, right.
1326
00:58:13,874 --> 00:58:14,914
Like is that...?
1327
00:58:15,041 --> 00:58:17,289
It's more like...
It was like that.
1328
00:58:17,416 --> 00:58:18,831
What?
But the head.
1329
00:58:18,958 --> 00:58:20,539
What?
It's even bigger.
1330
00:58:20,666 --> 00:58:21,914
Mama likes.
1331
00:58:22,041 --> 00:58:23,914
I don't know if you're gonna like it.
1332
00:58:25,999 --> 00:58:28,373
Oh, hi.
1333
00:58:28,499 --> 00:58:29,748
Eric?
1334
00:58:29,874 --> 00:58:32,164
Kelly.
Uh, we're just heading back to the city.
1335
00:58:32,291 --> 00:58:33,491
Yeah, we'll be in touch this week.
1336
00:58:33,491 --> 00:58:34,123
Good.
1337
00:58:34,249 --> 00:58:35,331
Regarding the house.
1338
00:58:35,458 --> 00:58:38,373
Of course, the house, yes.
Yeah, I'll page you.
1339
00:58:40,833 --> 00:58:42,041
Dody.
1340
00:58:42,041 --> 00:58:43,248
Eric.
1341
00:58:43,374 --> 00:58:45,289
The password this week is unicorn.
1342
00:58:46,416 --> 00:58:48,498
Well, I don't know if that'll be nece...
1343
00:59:04,458 --> 00:59:06,956
We're here to share <i>our</i> experiences
1344
00:59:07,083 --> 00:59:10,873
<i>in creating the perfect orgy of your personal fantasies.</i>
1345
00:59:16,289 --> 00:59:19,041
See that?
Everybody's always touching two people.
1346
00:59:18,541 --> 00:59:20,331
A little teamwork over there.
1347
00:59:20,458 --> 00:59:22,039
They're playing good team ball.
1348
00:59:22,166 --> 00:59:24,498
Okay, I think we get the picture.
1349
00:59:31,541 --> 00:59:33,289
McCrudds, you want some pizza?
1350
00:59:33,416 --> 00:59:35,081
No, I'm not hungry.
Thank you.
1351
00:59:35,205 --> 00:59:37,334
Got an all-I-can-eat buffet going right here.
1352
00:59:40,955 --> 00:59:42,334
What is that?
1353
00:59:45,205 --> 00:59:46,103
<i>Oh!</i>
1354
00:59:46,103 --> 00:59:47,001
<i>Shit!</i>
1355
00:59:47,121 --> 00:59:49,501
Oh, he's doing my move.
Look at that.
1356
00:59:49,621 --> 00:59:51,667
He knows the Thoosh.
1357
00:59:54,538 --> 00:59:55,834
Hey, you guys?
Guys.
1358
00:59:55,955 --> 01:00:00,292
Back to the music. Are we...?
Are we really gonna listen to Indian the whole night?
1359
01:00:00,413 --> 01:00:01,790
I think it might get a little...
1360
01:00:01,790 --> 01:00:03,167
Cab ride-y? Agreed. Yeah.
1361
01:00:03,288 --> 01:00:05,626
I'm working on a killer playlist right now.
1362
01:00:05,746 --> 01:00:07,459
Got some obscure Radiohead.
1363
01:00:07,580 --> 01:00:09,667
Who has sex to Radiohead?
1364
01:00:09,788 --> 01:00:11,667
Thom Yorke.
1365
01:00:11,788 --> 01:00:13,209
No Radiohead.
No Radiohead.
1366
01:00:13,330 --> 01:00:16,501
I think we need something sensual,
like Sting.
1367
01:00:16,621 --> 01:00:17,332
I love Sting.
1368
01:00:17,332 --> 01:00:18,042
No. No. No.
1369
01:00:18,163 --> 01:00:20,459
Unacceptable.
Absolutely not fucking Sting.
1370
01:00:20,580 --> 01:00:23,292
That's bullshit, man.
If Sting comes on the fucking stereo,
1371
01:00:23,413 --> 01:00:24,917
guess who's walking.
This guy.
1372
01:00:25,038 --> 01:00:27,126
Sting, it is then.
1373
01:00:32,696 --> 01:00:34,034
got you a little present.
1374
01:00:34,155 --> 01:00:34,698
Really?
1375
01:00:34,698 --> 01:00:35,242
Mm-hm.
1376
01:00:35,571 --> 01:00:38,242
It's filled with some great things for next weekend.
1377
01:00:38,363 --> 01:00:40,492
It's not my birthday.
Oh.
1378
01:00:41,946 --> 01:00:45,534
Look, oh, boy. Oh, wow. Look at that guy.
He's like a Swiss Army dude.
1379
01:00:45,655 --> 01:00:47,951
Wow, that's great.
People are gonna love that.
1380
01:00:48,067 --> 01:00:49,067
Just so you know...
1381
01:00:49,067 --> 01:00:49,667
Mm-hm?
1382
01:00:50,692 --> 01:00:52,663
I'm not wearing any underwear right now.
1383
01:00:52,776 --> 01:00:54,205
Ew, on these stools?
1384
01:00:54,205 --> 01:00:56,234
Well, well, well, the gang's all here.
1385
01:00:56,234 --> 01:00:57,996
Paciellio!
1386
01:00:58,109 --> 01:00:59,663
Hi.
Paciellio.
1387
01:01:01,026 --> 01:01:01,948
Hi, guys.
1388
01:01:01,948 --> 01:01:02,871
What's up?
1389
01:01:02,984 --> 01:01:04,830
We have some business to discuss.
1390
01:01:04,942 --> 01:01:10,621
Right.
So Glenn and I have talked it over and...
1391
01:01:11,734 --> 01:01:14,205
we would like to be included in the orgy.
1392
01:01:15,734 --> 01:01:17,746
We're in.
1393
01:01:17,859 --> 01:01:18,996
We wanna do it.
1394
01:01:22,026 --> 01:01:23,996
Um...
1395
01:01:25,692 --> 01:01:26,788
No.
1396
01:01:26,901 --> 01:01:28,080
Why not?
What... What?
1397
01:01:28,192 --> 01:01:30,080
We already lined up my folks to babysit.
1398
01:01:30,526 --> 01:01:34,038
Guys, guys,
as a friend and a mental-health professional,
1399
01:01:34,151 --> 01:01:35,996
I think it is a horrible, horrible idea.
1400
01:01:36,109 --> 01:01:38,246
If you feel disconnected from the group,
I can understand...
1401
01:01:38,359 --> 01:01:41,080
Alison, with all due respect,
1402
01:01:41,192 --> 01:01:43,579
you're an MA,
I'm an MD.
1403
01:01:43,900 --> 01:01:45,454
You're a podiatrist.
1404
01:01:45,567 --> 01:01:47,288
Okay, let's take a vote.
1405
01:01:47,400 --> 01:01:48,800
How many people want us in?
1406
01:01:48,800 --> 01:01:49,704
Right.
1407
01:01:49,817 --> 01:01:52,996
I would just like to say that I think
they maybe have a point here.
1408
01:01:53,109 --> 01:01:56,454
Just because they have a baby
doesn't mean we should discriminate them.
1409
01:01:56,567 --> 01:01:59,788
Plus, Kate's rack is killer right now.
1410
01:01:59,900 --> 01:02:01,538
Thank you, Michael. Yeah.
1411
01:02:01,650 --> 01:02:05,204
Jesus, Mike,
are you insane? No. No, no.
1412
01:02:05,317 --> 01:02:08,246
Dude, dude, dude, 10 o'clock.
Ten o'clock. My 10, my 10.
1413
01:02:09,484 --> 01:02:10,871
Shit.
1414
01:02:10,984 --> 01:02:13,704
Hey!
Look who it is.
1415
01:02:13,817 --> 01:02:15,371
Hi, there it is.
1416
01:02:15,484 --> 01:02:17,413
Hey, uh,
this is my Realtor, Kelly.
1417
01:02:17,525 --> 01:02:19,288
This is the group,
the gang.
1418
01:02:19,400 --> 01:02:21,079
Hi, Kelly.
1419
01:02:21,192 --> 01:02:23,621
Gosh, I've heard so much about all of you guys.
1420
01:02:23,734 --> 01:02:25,288
How?
When?
1421
01:02:25,400 --> 01:02:26,719
What? Why? What's she hiking about?
1422
01:02:26,719 --> 01:02:28,038
Let's get a drink shall we?
1423
01:02:28,150 --> 01:02:29,829
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1424
01:02:30,900 --> 01:02:33,746
You think we couldn't handle this because we're parents?
1425
01:02:33,859 --> 01:02:36,913
Well, we can handle shit that you can't even imagine.
1426
01:02:37,025 --> 01:02:39,663
You know,
you motherfuckers have no idea.
1427
01:02:39,775 --> 01:02:40,469
That's right.
1428
01:02:40,469 --> 01:02:41,163
No idea.
1429
01:02:41,275 --> 01:02:42,386
Come on.
1430
01:02:42,386 --> 01:02:43,496
You... You...
1431
01:02:43,609 --> 01:02:45,663
You're all lightweights
1432
01:02:45,775 --> 01:02:48,621
You are all playing JV ball.
1433
01:02:48,734 --> 01:02:49,282
Lightweights!
1434
01:02:49,282 --> 01:02:49,829
Whoa!
1435
01:02:49,942 --> 01:02:50,907
All right, Glenn.
1436
01:02:50,907 --> 01:02:51,871
Come on, honey.
1437
01:02:52,859 --> 01:02:56,204
On a lighter note,
I have this present.
1438
01:02:58,609 --> 01:02:59,829
Dildos!
1439
01:02:59,942 --> 01:03:02,913
You know, in a pinch,
this would be great for a toothbrush.
1440
01:03:05,775 --> 01:03:07,371
And I have no idea what this is.
1441
01:03:07,484 --> 01:03:09,829
Hey, Eric,
what's up with all the dildos?
1442
01:03:09,942 --> 01:03:12,996
Hey, those are my friends, lady.
Hey, what's going on with the house?
1443
01:03:13,109 --> 01:03:17,913
Um, I've been able to slow things down
to buy you till the end of the summer.
1444
01:03:18,442 --> 01:03:19,240
Really?
1445
01:03:19,240 --> 01:03:20,038
Yeah.
1446
01:03:20,734 --> 01:03:22,788
Oh, you're the best.
1447
01:03:25,067 --> 01:03:26,454
Thank you so much.
1448
01:03:26,567 --> 01:03:27,365
What is that?
1449
01:03:27,365 --> 01:03:28,163
What? What?
1450
01:03:28,275 --> 01:03:29,073
What's going on?
1451
01:03:29,073 --> 01:03:29,871
Nothing.
1452
01:03:29,984 --> 01:03:31,788
No, he told me not to tell anybody so...
1453
01:03:31,900 --> 01:03:32,594
Yeah, okay.
1454
01:03:32,594 --> 01:03:33,288
You know.
1455
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:35,219
Keep it on the down-low.
1456
01:03:35,219 --> 01:03:36,038
Yeah.
1457
01:03:36,150 --> 01:03:37,996
He asked her out to get them to shill.
1458
01:03:38,109 --> 01:03:39,746
Went on a couple dates,
he start likes her,
1459
01:03:39,859 --> 01:03:43,413
decide doesn't want to sleep with her before
the orgy because it's wrong to do both.
1460
01:03:43,525 --> 01:03:45,454
Oh.
He doesn't wanna sleep with her.
1461
01:03:45,567 --> 01:03:47,788
That actually means he likes her.
1462
01:03:47,900 --> 01:03:48,427
Oh.
1463
01:03:48,427 --> 01:03:48,954
Awesome.
1464
01:03:49,067 --> 01:03:50,788
Hey.
Dildo wave.
1465
01:03:50,900 --> 01:03:52,954
Hi.
1466
01:04:11,025 --> 01:04:12,621
Phew!
1467
01:04:12,734 --> 01:04:15,371
Yo, maharajah,
wanna get my back for me?
1468
01:04:15,484 --> 01:04:17,663
What is this shit?
Self tanner, man.
1469
01:04:17,775 --> 01:04:19,663
I wanna look like a porn star.
1470
01:04:19,775 --> 01:04:22,163
Fuck me,
I just stroked out my third batch <i>du jour.</i>
1471
01:04:22,276 --> 01:04:26,078
You boys might wanna do the same.
Don't wanna come quick like a bunch of amateurs.
1472
01:04:26,193 --> 01:04:29,078
Oh, God.
I am not touching you.
1473
01:04:29,985 --> 01:04:32,078
Ah, fuck it.
I'm gonna whack it again.
1474
01:04:32,195 --> 01:04:34,993
You look so pretty.
So do you.
1475
01:04:35,112 --> 01:04:36,201
Thank you.
1476
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:37,743
I love it.
1477
01:04:37,862 --> 01:04:39,493
Consider yourself warned.
1478
01:04:39,612 --> 01:04:43,035
This absinthe is the real deal.
I had it flown in from Amsterdam.
1479
01:04:43,153 --> 01:04:47,368
The guy that sold it to me said it's the same stuff
Van Gogh was on when he cut his ear off.
1480
01:04:47,487 --> 01:04:48,094
Oh, no.
1481
01:04:48,094 --> 01:04:48,701
Uh-oh.
1482
01:04:48,820 --> 01:04:50,618
It's gonna be a starry night, huh?
1483
01:04:50,737 --> 01:04:51,910
It smells like licorice.
1484
01:04:52,028 --> 01:04:54,410
A toast.
A toast.
1485
01:04:54,528 --> 01:04:56,076
To friends.
1486
01:04:56,195 --> 01:04:57,618
To friends.
1487
01:04:57,737 --> 01:05:01,868
And to making sweet love with, to, near...
1488
01:05:01,987 --> 01:05:02,636
On.
1489
01:05:02,636 --> 01:05:03,285
In.
1490
01:05:03,403 --> 01:05:05,535
Under.
And behind.
1491
01:05:07,820 --> 01:05:09,618
All right, <i>salud.</i>
1492
01:05:12,903 --> 01:05:14,534
Hagalaka.
1493
01:05:14,653 --> 01:05:16,701
Whoo! Sober.
Never more
1494
01:05:24,986 --> 01:05:26,701
The pillows look really nice.
1495
01:05:26,820 --> 01:05:28,159
Yeah.
1496
01:05:28,278 --> 01:05:30,243
These Crate and Barrel or...?
1497
01:05:38,778 --> 01:05:39,868
You guys look great.
1498
01:05:39,986 --> 01:05:41,159
Oh, thanks.
1499
01:05:41,278 --> 01:05:42,659
You look so fucking hot.
1500
01:05:42,778 --> 01:05:45,659
I'm just being honest.
I wanna lick your belly button.
1501
01:05:45,778 --> 01:05:48,868
And yours, your belly button's nice too.
You got a good one too.
1502
01:05:48,986 --> 01:05:52,159
I haven't seen yours,
but I'm gonna lick the shit out of that thing.
1503
01:05:52,278 --> 01:05:53,659
Wow.
1504
01:05:53,778 --> 01:05:56,659
As the de facto lead wolf, right?
1505
01:05:56,778 --> 01:05:59,576
I, uh...
I should kick this mofo off,
1506
01:05:59,695 --> 01:06:02,868
but I got be honest with you.
I have no idea what to do, so...
1507
01:06:02,986 --> 01:06:03,739
Lead wolf?
1508
01:06:03,739 --> 01:06:04,493
Oh, yeah.
1509
01:06:04,611 --> 01:06:06,218
You had to be there kind of...
1510
01:06:06,218 --> 01:06:07,826
Tut-tut-tut. Okay.
1511
01:06:07,945 --> 01:06:10,451
Listen up, everybody.
As per usual,
1512
01:06:10,570 --> 01:06:13,493
it is up to me to get this party started.
1513
01:06:13,611 --> 01:06:16,951
Hang on. I got something for you.
Hang on a second, ladies.
1514
01:06:22,070 --> 01:06:23,323
Yeah, rock 'n' roll.
1515
01:06:23,323 --> 01:06:24,576
Holy moly.
1516
01:06:24,695 --> 01:06:25,784
We're on safari now.
1517
01:06:25,903 --> 01:06:27,034
Yeah.
1518
01:06:27,153 --> 01:06:28,659
How many leopards had to die?
1519
01:06:28,778 --> 01:06:30,951
Just one big old kinky leopard.
1520
01:06:32,278 --> 01:06:33,478
They won't kick us out.
1521
01:06:33,478 --> 01:06:35,701
If we're here,
they won't kick us out.
1522
01:06:35,820 --> 01:06:36,620
Okay.
1523
01:06:36,620 --> 01:06:38,243
They won't do it.
1524
01:06:38,361 --> 01:06:41,409
And we're totally sure we wanna do this?
1525
01:06:44,945 --> 01:06:48,201
Somebody do something.
Huh?
1526
01:06:48,320 --> 01:06:51,076
All right?
Anybody?
1527
01:06:51,861 --> 01:06:56,243
All right, fuck it. I'm gonna call it.
Sue, kiss Alison. I'm gonna shirt touching myself.
1528
01:06:56,361 --> 01:07:00,076
Oh.
We could shirt with a back-rub circle like in college.
1529
01:07:02,778 --> 01:07:04,993
I'll get things started.
1530
01:07:05,111 --> 01:07:06,576
Yes.
Yeah!
1531
01:07:06,695 --> 01:07:08,784
Here we go.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1532
01:07:09,570 --> 01:07:12,618
I'm sorry, I can't.
I can't do this any more.
1533
01:07:12,736 --> 01:07:14,409
I can't. I can't do this.
I'm sorry.
1534
01:07:16,861 --> 01:07:17,909
I knew it.
1535
01:07:18,028 --> 01:07:20,243
I knew you'd fucking puss out, man.
1536
01:07:20,361 --> 01:07:22,659
I'm not pussing out.
I'm happen in a relationship
1537
01:07:22,778 --> 01:07:25,659
that I really appreciate.
And I don't wanna fuck this up.
1538
01:07:25,778 --> 01:07:28,576
Classic Duquez. You know,
it's like doughnuts, no doughnuts,
1539
01:07:28,695 --> 01:07:30,576
hat, no hat, orgy,
no orgy.
1540
01:07:30,695 --> 01:07:32,534
We take a look-see through the window
1541
01:07:32,653 --> 01:07:35,201
and if it looks, like,
too freaky or lame,
1542
01:07:35,320 --> 01:07:36,909
Yeah.
We take off.
1543
01:07:37,028 --> 01:07:41,159
And if it looks,
you know, cool, we go in.
1544
01:07:41,278 --> 01:07:42,114
Okay?
1545
01:07:42,114 --> 01:07:42,951
okay...
1546
01:07:43,070 --> 01:07:44,534
I'm not mad at you.
1547
01:07:44,653 --> 01:07:47,034
Eric, Eric.
I love what's going on here,
1548
01:07:47,153 --> 01:07:49,284
but I don't think you need to insult each other.
1549
01:07:49,403 --> 01:07:50,718
You should actually communicate.
1550
01:07:50,718 --> 01:07:52,034
My God, Alison, please for all of us?
1551
01:07:52,153 --> 01:07:53,927
Would you give it a rest? Just one night?
1552
01:07:53,927 --> 01:07:55,701
You're totally uncomfortable with real emotion.
1553
01:07:55,820 --> 01:07:58,368
Oh, yeah, I can't.
I'm the only one here with issues.
1554
01:07:58,486 --> 01:08:01,201
It's just me?
What about you and your disfunctional relationship?
1555
01:08:03,320 --> 01:08:03,927
We broke up.
1556
01:08:03,927 --> 01:08:04,534
You broke up?
1557
01:08:04,653 --> 01:08:05,177
Yes.
1558
01:08:05,177 --> 01:08:05,701
Oh, you broke up?
1559
01:08:05,820 --> 01:08:09,201
Like the same you guys broke up a couple years
ago at the Oktoberfest in July party?
1560
01:08:09,320 --> 01:08:10,386
Like that kind of broke up?
1561
01:08:10,386 --> 01:08:11,451
Wait, what happened on Oktoberfest?
1562
01:08:11,570 --> 01:08:14,868
This one tells me that her and Marcus are broken up.
The're over. Done. Fenito. Right?
1563
01:08:14,986 --> 01:08:18,034
So, we're joking around, we having some drinks,
she tells me about it, then we hook up.
1564
01:08:18,153 --> 01:08:20,743
Very next morning,
she's having brunch with the guy.
1565
01:08:20,861 --> 01:08:23,201
Whoa, whoa, wait? What?
1566
01:08:23,320 --> 01:08:24,659
You never told me this.
1567
01:08:24,778 --> 01:08:28,576
Sue, I don't need to tell you because nothing happened.
We didn't sleep together.
1568
01:08:28,695 --> 01:08:31,076
You told me it was a blowjob,
she wouldn't swallow.
1569
01:08:31,195 --> 01:08:33,368
No, I did not, Mike.
I did not say that.
1570
01:08:33,486 --> 01:08:34,739
It was a fucking hand job.
1571
01:08:34,739 --> 01:08:35,993
Oh, that's hand job. That's right.
1572
01:08:36,111 --> 01:08:38,243
It was a hand job.
I'm sorry. My bad.
1573
01:08:38,361 --> 01:08:39,468
Please don't go there.
1574
01:08:39,468 --> 01:08:40,576
No, no, no.
1575
01:08:40,695 --> 01:08:44,076
Alison, shut up.
You're a hypocrite.
1576
01:08:44,194 --> 01:08:45,492
What's going on?
1577
01:08:45,611 --> 01:08:49,992
First of all,
they're dressed like Indians from India.
1578
01:08:50,111 --> 01:08:51,093
That makes much more sense.
1579
01:08:51,093 --> 01:08:52,076
Yeah.
1580
01:08:52,194 --> 01:08:53,593
This is why I don't tell you.
1581
01:08:53,593 --> 01:08:54,992
You could've given him a blowjob.
1582
01:08:55,111 --> 01:08:56,302
Why didn't you fuck him?
1583
01:08:56,302 --> 01:08:57,492
Why don't you get over it?
1584
01:08:57,611 --> 01:09:00,451
How long are you gonna be obsessed with Eric?
1585
01:09:01,403 --> 01:09:02,492
Oh, shit.
1586
01:09:03,486 --> 01:09:05,034
Wait, what?
1587
01:09:06,444 --> 01:09:08,451
Okay. Ookay...
1588
01:09:08,569 --> 01:09:10,784
Urch' your brakes on, people.
1589
01:09:10,903 --> 01:09:13,492
We are rapidly losing the erotic vibe.
1590
01:09:14,069 --> 01:09:17,617
I'm gonna get this party rocking right here in a major way.
1591
01:09:17,736 --> 01:09:19,326
What you got, man?
1592
01:09:19,444 --> 01:09:21,867
Ready, set,
here we go.
1593
01:09:21,986 --> 01:09:24,284
Oh!
Let loose the Kraken.
1594
01:09:24,403 --> 01:09:26,326
Yeah!
1595
01:09:26,444 --> 01:09:29,451
Will you give it a break, Mike?
This shit's pathetic.
1596
01:09:29,569 --> 01:09:32,201
Oh, fuck you.
You fucking pussy. You're lame.
1597
01:09:32,319 --> 01:09:33,784
You're the lame one, man.
1598
01:09:33,903 --> 01:09:37,284
You don't have a job. You don't have a girlfriend.
You just follow Eric around
1599
01:09:37,403 --> 01:09:40,742
and do everything he tells you to do.
You're like his little fucking pet.
1600
01:09:43,444 --> 01:09:45,076
Dougie.
1601
01:09:45,194 --> 01:09:46,284
Fuck you, Doug.
1602
01:09:50,986 --> 01:09:54,951
Is that what all of you think of me?
You think that I'm his...? You think I'm his fucking pet?
1603
01:09:55,069 --> 01:09:56,784
No.
1604
01:09:57,486 --> 01:10:00,992
He meant pet in a nice way.
1605
01:10:03,694 --> 01:10:05,742
Is he fucking with me right now?
1606
01:10:06,342 --> 01:10:09,836
This is the worst orgy ever.
1607
01:10:09,236 --> 01:10:11,284
Should we just go home or...?
1608
01:10:11,403 --> 01:10:12,909
No.
1609
01:10:13,028 --> 01:10:15,284
We already got a sitter.
1610
01:10:15,403 --> 01:10:17,951
You wanna go see a movie or you wanna...?
1611
01:10:21,653 --> 01:10:23,284
Okay, okay.
All right, time out.
1612
01:10:23,403 --> 01:10:25,576
Time out.
Time out, T.O., okay?
1613
01:10:25,694 --> 01:10:28,951
Look, I think everyone just needs to take a deep breath.
1614
01:10:29,069 --> 01:10:30,367
All right?
1615
01:10:31,361 --> 01:10:34,826
We need to relax and chill out for a second,
all right?
1616
01:10:34,944 --> 01:10:36,492
Whoa!
1617
01:10:36,611 --> 01:10:37,951
Where are you going?
1618
01:10:38,069 --> 01:10:40,201
I'm just going outside to get some fresh air.
1619
01:10:40,319 --> 01:10:41,867
Clear my head.
1620
01:10:44,986 --> 01:10:47,534
I swear to God, guys,
I thought this was gonna be fun.
1621
01:11:11,111 --> 01:11:13,659
Oh, yeah.
Oh!
1622
01:11:13,778 --> 01:11:16,492
Why won't God just let me have an orgy?
1623
01:11:24,028 --> 01:11:27,326
Okay. All right,
here we go.
1624
01:11:30,403 --> 01:11:31,593
Eric.
1625
01:11:31,593 --> 01:11:32,784
Kelly, heh, heh.
1626
01:11:32,903 --> 01:11:35,492
What are you doing here?
I thought you were doing something with your friends.
1627
01:11:35,611 --> 01:11:36,826
I know.
I know. Uh...
1628
01:11:36,944 --> 01:11:38,534
Did you fly here on a carpet?
1629
01:11:38,653 --> 01:11:40,909
No, heh.
No, no. I, uh...
1630
01:11:41,028 --> 01:11:43,992
It's a last-second costume concept for, uh...
1631
01:11:44,069 --> 01:11:48,284
Look, I, uh... I've been thinking about
things and I realized something.
1632
01:11:49,028 --> 01:11:50,159
Oh, shit.
1633
01:11:50,278 --> 01:11:52,909
I thought we ordered pizza.
What'd you get, Indian food?
1634
01:11:55,528 --> 01:11:56,617
I'm sorry.
1635
01:11:56,736 --> 01:11:59,659
I, uh...
Sorry to interrupt. Sorry.
1636
01:11:59,778 --> 01:12:02,576
Uh, Pete, give us a second?
Hey, hey, hey, Eric.
1637
01:12:02,694 --> 01:12:04,284
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
1638
01:12:04,403 --> 01:12:04,968
You didn't call.
1639
01:12:04,968 --> 01:12:05,534
I know.
1640
01:12:05,653 --> 01:12:08,367
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
1641
01:12:08,486 --> 01:12:11,242
Oh, pizza?
Really?
1642
01:12:11,361 --> 01:12:12,343
I'm sorry.
1643
01:12:12,343 --> 01:12:13,325
No, that's all right.
1644
01:12:13,444 --> 01:12:14,364
Hey, what's up, man?
1645
01:12:14,364 --> 01:12:15,284
Eighteen bucks.
1646
01:12:15,402 --> 01:12:16,950
Go, have fun.
Hone...
1647
01:12:17,069 --> 01:12:19,284
Honestly.
No biggie.
1648
01:12:19,402 --> 01:12:20,784
I'll call you tomorrow.
1649
01:12:22,527 --> 01:12:23,992
Bye.
1650
01:12:25,819 --> 01:12:29,784
Like I don't know that I don't have a girlfriend.
1651
01:12:29,902 --> 01:12:35,325
Like I'm not trying to remember
that every fucking night of my life.
1652
01:12:35,444 --> 01:12:37,700
It's hard.
1653
01:12:44,661 --> 01:12:46,185
So where were we?
1654
01:12:46,685 --> 01:12:48,209
Where'd you go?
1655
01:12:47,827 --> 01:12:49,959
I know, I know,
I know, I, uh... Heh.
1656
01:12:50,077 --> 01:12:52,875
I'm sorry I left. You know, I...
1657
01:12:53,375 --> 01:13:00,827
I'm gonna be honest
with you, guys. Um, I'm freaking out a little.
1658
01:13:00,327 --> 01:13:03,042
I have had the best times of my life
1659
01:13:03,161 --> 01:13:05,375
with you guys in this house
1660
01:13:05,494 --> 01:13:10,167
and I'm gonna miss it.
1661
01:13:10,494 --> 01:13:13,167
I'm gonna miss it so much.
1662
01:13:13,286 --> 01:13:15,709
I love you GUYS...
1663
01:13:16,009 --> 01:13:19,544
I love every single one of you.
1664
01:13:19,244 --> 01:13:20,667
She wasn't home, huh?
1665
01:13:21,286 --> 01:13:24,167
No.
No, She was home.
1666
01:13:24,286 --> 01:13:25,500
She was on a date.
1667
01:13:27,202 --> 01:13:30,625
Yeah.
And I showed up dressed like fucking Aladdin.
1668
01:13:32,577 --> 01:13:35,000
Well, I think that you look adorable.
1669
01:13:35,119 --> 01:13:39,500
And I am so happy that you're back.
1670
01:13:39,619 --> 01:13:43,250
It's been a pretty emotional night for all of us.
1671
01:13:43,369 --> 01:13:46,750
How about a big super-gay group hug?
1672
01:13:46,869 --> 01:13:47,914
Oh, yeah.
1673
01:13:47,914 --> 01:13:48,959
Group hug.
1674
01:13:49,077 --> 01:13:50,125
Yeah.
1675
01:13:50,244 --> 01:13:52,625
Oh!
I love you guys.
1676
01:13:57,452 --> 01:13:58,709
Oh, my God.
1677
01:13:58,827 --> 01:14:00,959
1678
01:14:00,959 --> 01:14:03,659
Oh, my... I would not have called that.
1679
01:14:08,536 --> 01:14:10,167
Hey, what was that about earlier?
1680
01:14:10,286 --> 01:14:11,667
Yeah, nothing.
Later. What?
1681
01:14:14,202 --> 01:14:15,500
Wha...?
1682
01:14:16,577 --> 01:14:18,375
Oh, gosh!
1683
01:14:18,494 --> 01:14:20,792
It's happening.
It's really happening.
1684
01:14:20,911 --> 01:14:23,667
We can do this.
I don't know if I can.
1685
01:14:23,786 --> 01:14:25,542
We'll do it together.
Okay?
1686
01:14:27,869 --> 01:14:30,125
One.
1687
01:14:31,536 --> 01:14:33,542
Two.
1688
01:14:35,869 --> 01:14:36,959
Three.
1689
01:14:39,744 --> 01:14:41,750
Hello, boobs.
1690
01:14:44,411 --> 01:14:45,584
Are they okay?
1691
01:14:46,784 --> 01:14:49,184
They're fucking fabulous.
1692
01:14:49,036 --> 01:14:51,250
Thank you.
1693
01:14:53,577 --> 01:14:56,709
Oh.
And just so you know, um,
1694
01:14:56,827 --> 01:15:01,167
I've never been able to orgasm,
so no pressure.
1695
01:15:01,286 --> 01:15:03,250
I'm all about giving pleasure.
1696
01:15:03,369 --> 01:15:05,500
This is so much better than porn.
1697
01:15:16,036 --> 01:15:17,542
Oh, my God!
1698
01:15:17,661 --> 01:15:18,709
I told you so.
1699
01:15:18,827 --> 01:15:19,959
You weren't kidding.
1700
01:15:20,577 --> 01:15:23,542
That is remarkable that he is insecure.
1701
01:15:26,411 --> 01:15:28,459
Tequila!
1702
01:15:52,910 --> 01:15:55,542
Everybody, drink from the ceiling.
1703
01:16:05,535 --> 01:16:06,601
Hey, Mike.
1704
01:16:06,601 --> 01:16:07,667
Hi there.
1705
01:16:07,785 --> 01:16:11,875
You guys have got try these chocolate-covered
strawberries. They're so decadent.
1706
01:16:11,994 --> 01:16:14,333
Oh, no, no. I'm good.
I just had some Bagel Bites.
1707
01:16:15,152 --> 01:16:16,842
Where'd you get Bagel Bites?
1708
01:16:16,142 --> 01:16:17,833
Shh. Forget it.
1709
01:16:17,952 --> 01:16:19,583
Mahalo, freaky people.
1710
01:16:19,702 --> 01:16:23,500
We were thinking it might be fun if we
all went out and made love in the pool.
1711
01:16:23,619 --> 01:16:24,809
Yes, yes.
1712
01:16:25,309 --> 01:16:26,500
Yeah, you wanna go in the pool?
1713
01:16:26,119 --> 01:16:28,542
No. No, no. We're good right here.
We're good.
1714
01:16:28,660 --> 01:16:29,414
Oh, we're okay.
1715
01:16:29,414 --> 01:16:30,167
Yeah.
1716
01:16:30,285 --> 01:16:33,500
Thanks though.
It's chlorinated. Have fun.
1717
01:16:35,869 --> 01:16:37,958
Sue, I'm so happy for you.
1718
01:16:38,077 --> 01:16:41,208
All right, Hey, guys,
could we just get a minute? Just a minute?
1719
01:16:41,327 --> 01:16:43,208
Yeah, just give us a sec,
will you?
1720
01:16:43,327 --> 01:16:46,292
Oh, so sorry.
1721
01:16:46,410 --> 01:16:49,010
We're not giving you enough privacy at an orgy?
1722
01:16:51,710 --> 01:16:52,710
Kind of a fair hit.
1723
01:16:52,610 --> 01:16:53,583
Yeah, now, shh.
1724
01:16:53,702 --> 01:16:55,625
Are you okay?
You wanna talk or something?
1725
01:16:55,744 --> 01:16:58,625
No, no.
Just be in the moment.
1726
01:16:58,744 --> 01:17:01,833
Okay. Yeah, no, can do.
Can do. Okay. Okay.
1727
01:17:04,369 --> 01:17:05,434
Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.
1728
01:17:05,434 --> 01:17:06,500
Oh, yeah?
1729
01:17:06,619 --> 01:17:08,125
You like to dirty talk?
Yeah?
1730
01:17:08,244 --> 01:17:09,122
Ooh, fuck.
1731
01:17:09,122 --> 01:17:10,000
Okay, you wanna fuck me?
1732
01:17:10,119 --> 01:17:11,559
You wanna fuck me hard?
1733
01:17:11,559 --> 01:17:13,000
No, Sue. Hop off. My foot, my foot.
1734
01:17:13,119 --> 01:17:14,208
Oh, oh, okay.
1735
01:17:14,327 --> 01:17:15,458
Oh, foot cramp.
Oh!
1736
01:17:15,577 --> 01:17:16,917
Okay.
Ooh, that's a doozie.
1737
01:17:17,035 --> 01:17:18,250
Shh. Okay.
All right
1738
01:17:18,369 --> 01:17:21,208
Oh, God,
my big toe's so far away from my other toes.
1739
01:17:21,327 --> 01:17:23,250
Okay, hey.
Hey, flex it out.
1740
01:17:23,369 --> 01:17:25,083
Flex it out.
Flex it, okay.
1741
01:17:25,202 --> 01:17:27,500
Oh, we should have done this 15 years ago.
1742
01:17:27,952 --> 01:17:29,917
Hey, guys.
1743
01:17:29,917 --> 01:17:32,217
I broke my diet.
1744
01:17:35,535 --> 01:17:36,476
Okay. You're good?
1745
01:17:36,476 --> 01:17:37,417
Oh, yeah.
1746
01:17:37,035 --> 01:17:38,958
Yeah? You're good?
Okay. There it goes.
1747
01:17:39,077 --> 01:17:41,458
There it goes.
Oh, wow. Okay.
1748
01:17:41,577 --> 01:17:43,375
Shh! Okay.
Okay. Okay.
1749
01:17:43,494 --> 01:17:46,833
Oh, no, it's back.
It's back worse!
1750
01:17:46,952 --> 01:17:49,083
Ooh, it's...
The little guy is in on it now.
1751
01:17:49,202 --> 01:17:51,875
Hey, gang.
Sake bombs.
1752
01:18:01,244 --> 01:18:02,542
Oh, my God!
1753
01:18:02,660 --> 01:18:05,375
Oh, my God, my dick is having the best night of its life.
1754
01:18:05,375 --> 01:18:08,535
Oh, we're all fucking. Oh, we're all finally fucking.
1755
01:18:08,535 --> 01:18:10,625
Oh, and I can be as loud as I fucking want!
1756
01:18:10,744 --> 01:18:11,833
Oh, no.
Shh, shh.
1757
01:18:14,327 --> 01:18:15,792
Owl Ow,
my contact.
1758
01:18:15,910 --> 01:18:17,375
Alison, my contact.
1759
01:18:17,494 --> 01:18:19,038
I'm good. I'm good. Play through.
1760
01:18:19,038 --> 01:18:20,583
Bro, count me down.
1761
01:18:20,702 --> 01:18:21,955
What?
1762
01:18:21,955 --> 01:18:23,208
Count me down from five.
1763
01:18:23,208 --> 01:18:24,869
What does that even mean?
1764
01:18:24,869 --> 01:18:26,531
Oh, fuck! Count me down from 10.
1765
01:18:26,531 --> 01:18:28,796
Count him down, Adam.
Trust me, just count him down.
1766
01:18:30,240 --> 01:18:32,712
Guys, this whole sex in the pool thing is not working.
1767
01:18:33,323 --> 01:18:35,879
Water is not a lubricant.
1768
01:18:35,490 --> 01:18:38,837
Okay, brothers and sisters.
Let's take this party indoors.
1769
01:18:38,948 --> 01:18:41,629
I'm running with a boner!
1770
01:18:41,948 --> 01:18:43,504
Pineapple mojitos.
1771
01:18:44,823 --> 01:18:46,337
Yeah, mulched with fresh mint.
1772
01:18:48,073 --> 01:18:49,171
Fuck!
1773
01:18:49,281 --> 01:18:50,462
Are you ready?
1774
01:18:50,573 --> 01:18:52,712
As I'll ever be.
1775
01:18:57,115 --> 01:18:59,504
Ooh! I'm next,
I'm next, I'm next.
1776
01:19:00,698 --> 01:19:01,796
Vodka tonic.
1777
01:19:07,323 --> 01:19:10,295
Yo, can I tag in?
1778
01:19:10,406 --> 01:19:13,879
Oh! You're like the sweet,
tender lion.
1779
01:19:13,989 --> 01:19:15,670
Mike, go away.
1780
01:19:15,781 --> 01:19:19,295
You guys haven't slept with anybody else yet.
You're hogging Willow.
1781
01:19:19,406 --> 01:19:21,129
Go away.
1782
01:19:21,239 --> 01:19:23,004
Go away, Mike.
1783
01:19:23,714 --> 01:19:24,812
Vodka.
1784
01:19:26,131 --> 01:19:27,229
Come on.
1785
01:19:27,339 --> 01:19:31,437
Sue, I just wanna say I'm so
sorry about the whole Eric thing.
1786
01:19:31,548 --> 01:19:34,895
No. Totally don't.
It's so over. I don't care.
1787
01:19:35,006 --> 01:19:39,729
No, but you know,
you're a really good friend and I love you.
1788
01:19:39,839 --> 01:19:44,187
No, I love you.
You are so smart and you're so beautiful.
1789
01:19:44,298 --> 01:19:48,062
And I totally get why he would wanna be with you.
1790
01:19:48,173 --> 01:19:49,604
You're the beautiful one.
1791
01:19:49,714 --> 01:19:52,604
Oh, my God,
your body is ridiculous.
1792
01:19:52,714 --> 01:19:54,895
Your body is ridiculous, okay?
1793
01:19:55,006 --> 01:19:58,187
And I would give anything to have your breasts
1794
01:19:58,298 --> 01:19:59,979
just for, like,
one day.
1795
01:20:00,089 --> 01:20:04,562
Yeah, but your ass is off the charts, seriously.
1796
01:20:04,714 --> 01:20:07,104
Okay. I would kill to have your eyes.
1797
01:20:07,104 --> 01:20:11,131
You know that you have the most beautiful green eyes
1798
01:20:11,131 --> 01:20:14,312
that I have ever seen.
1799
01:20:19,798 --> 01:20:21,270
Oh, yeah.
1800
01:20:26,381 --> 01:20:27,159
Oh, yeah
1801
01:20:27,159 --> 01:20:27,937
Oh!
1802
01:20:28,548 --> 01:20:29,854
Wow!
1803
01:20:29,964 --> 01:20:31,187
I saw that.
You see that?
1804
01:20:31,298 --> 01:20:33,180
It looked like a little flash of light.
1805
01:20:33,180 --> 01:20:35,062
I know. I think I just... God.
1806
01:20:35,714 --> 01:20:37,687
I never thought I'd hear myself say this,
1807
01:20:37,798 --> 01:20:40,062
but I'm gonna take a break
1808
01:20:40,173 --> 01:20:43,104
from this girl-on-girl-on-girl action
1809
01:20:43,214 --> 01:20:46,729
and check the score of the Yankee game.
1810
01:20:46,839 --> 01:20:48,895
This feels fucking fabulous.
1811
01:20:53,089 --> 01:20:54,145
Ah, Michael!
1812
01:20:54,756 --> 01:20:55,638
Let's go.
1813
01:20:55,638 --> 01:20:56,520
Are you sure?
1814
01:20:56,631 --> 01:20:58,645
Yes, 100,000 percent sure.
1815
01:20:58,756 --> 01:20:59,993
Let's go. Right now.
1816
01:20:59,993 --> 01:21:01,229
Okay, okay. Let's go.
1817
01:21:01,339 --> 01:21:04,979
You fucking did it. Look at this.
You are awe-inspiring.
1818
01:21:05,089 --> 01:21:06,229
Oh.
1819
01:21:06,339 --> 01:21:07,239
Thank you, Mike.
1820
01:21:07,239 --> 01:21:07,562
No.
1821
01:21:07,673 --> 01:21:11,979
I'm gonna tell you something right now and I
want you to listen because I fucking mean it.
1822
01:21:12,089 --> 01:21:13,687
Okay...
1823
01:21:13,798 --> 01:21:16,770
You could be the president of the United States.
1824
01:21:18,631 --> 01:21:20,520
Well I don't know, not after something like this.
1825
01:21:20,631 --> 01:21:23,937
Hey, shh, no.
I'm fucking serious.
1826
01:21:24,048 --> 01:21:27,145
You could do it if you wanted to.
1827
01:21:27,256 --> 01:21:29,145
Yeah.
1828
01:21:29,256 --> 01:21:31,187
You're getting kind of close, Mike.
1829
01:21:31,298 --> 01:21:32,034
Am I?
1830
01:21:32,034 --> 01:21:32,770
Yeah.
1831
01:21:32,881 --> 01:21:34,187
Oh.
1832
01:21:34,298 --> 01:21:36,645
You're not trying to kiss me,
are you?
1833
01:21:36,756 --> 01:21:38,437
Would it scare you if I was?
1834
01:21:39,298 --> 01:21:41,145
I guess so.
1835
01:21:41,256 --> 01:21:43,645
Fucking kiss chicken, dude.
1836
01:21:43,756 --> 01:21:44,930
It's on.
1837
01:21:44,930 --> 01:21:46,104
All right.
1838
01:21:46,214 --> 01:21:47,937
Let me just set this right here.
1839
01:21:48,048 --> 01:21:49,687
Whatever.
1840
01:21:56,589 --> 01:21:57,989
You scared yet?
1841
01:22:00,312 --> 01:22:01,112
No.
1842
01:22:01,131 --> 01:22:02,284
No?
1843
01:22:02,284 --> 01:22:03,437
Mm-mm.
1844
01:22:03,548 --> 01:22:07,104
How about now?
Touching your nose with my nose.
1845
01:22:07,214 --> 01:22:09,437
It's okay,
I'm part Eskimo.
1846
01:22:09,589 --> 01:22:11,562
We're nose-kissing, buddy.
1847
01:22:11,673 --> 01:22:14,104
It's more than our noses touching right now.
1848
01:22:14,214 --> 01:22:16,604
It's our souls.
1849
01:22:21,548 --> 01:22:23,437
Yeah, that's been brewing for years.
1850
01:22:23,548 --> 01:22:24,895
Well, I think we both won.
1851
01:22:26,964 --> 01:22:28,770
I'm pretty sure we both just lost.
1852
01:22:32,923 --> 01:22:33,868
Tonic.
1853
01:22:33,868 --> 01:22:34,812
Boo!
1854
01:22:37,714 --> 01:22:40,812
Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop.
Almost there. Almost there.
1855
01:22:40,922 --> 01:22:43,228
No, don't stop. Don't stop.
Ah! Don't stop.
1856
01:22:43,547 --> 01:22:46,645
It feels so good.
It feels so good, don't stop.
1857
01:22:50,631 --> 01:22:51,687
How about that?
1858
01:22:51,797 --> 01:22:54,270
So how long has this been going on?
1859
01:22:54,381 --> 01:22:55,687
About a half an hour.
1860
01:22:55,797 --> 01:22:57,853
I'm good. I'm gonna...
I'm getting it. Ah!
1861
01:22:57,964 --> 01:22:59,103
Poor bastard.
1862
01:22:59,214 --> 01:23:01,228
Fucking so good.
Aah!
1863
01:23:01,839 --> 01:23:03,187
Hang in there, buddy.
1864
01:23:02,687 --> 01:23:04,131
Almost there.
1865
01:23:04,131 --> 01:23:07,478
Yeah.
Yes. Yes!
1866
01:23:07,589 --> 01:23:09,437
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I'm coming.
1867
01:23:09,547 --> 01:23:12,103
Yes!
Oh, yes!
1868
01:23:12,214 --> 01:23:13,853
Yes, yes, yes!
1869
01:23:13,964 --> 01:23:16,853
Oh, yes!
Yes!
1870
01:23:16,960 --> 01:23:19,816
Yes!
Aah!
1871
01:23:39,293 --> 01:23:42,149
Hey!
Good morning, everybody.
1872
01:23:42,252 --> 01:23:44,357
So, uh,
look what I got.
1873
01:23:44,460 --> 01:23:46,982
Commemorative Labor Day orgy T-shirts right here.
1874
01:23:47,085 --> 01:23:48,482
Pink and blue.
1875
01:23:48,585 --> 01:23:50,774
Unisex, 100 percent cotton.
1876
01:23:50,877 --> 01:23:51,982
You made T-shirts?
1877
01:23:52,085 --> 01:23:53,566
Yup.
Laura.
1878
01:23:53,835 --> 01:23:55,566
Huh?
1879
01:23:56,293 --> 01:23:57,732
Where are we gonna wear these?
1880
01:23:57,835 --> 01:24:00,357
Anywhere.
What do you mean?
1881
01:24:00,877 --> 01:24:04,316
Jesus Christ,
I am hungover like a madman.
1882
01:24:05,585 --> 01:24:07,857
All right, ladies.
Ladies, I got one...
1883
01:24:07,960 --> 01:24:09,566
One easy question for all of you.
1884
01:24:10,043 --> 01:24:13,316
Overall, where would you rank me?
1885
01:24:13,418 --> 01:24:14,857
Just have a bagel and relax.
1886
01:24:14,960 --> 01:24:17,482
Listen, I need to know.
I just... I need to know.
1887
01:24:17,585 --> 01:24:21,441
Well, for me,
there was one clear winner.
1888
01:24:21,543 --> 01:24:25,191
Okay, I know, good. Eric. Blah, blah.
Big surprise. What about this guy?
1889
01:24:25,293 --> 01:24:27,293
I was gonna say Adam.
1890
01:24:27,293 --> 01:24:28,441
Adam.
1891
01:24:28,543 --> 01:24:29,857
What?
1892
01:24:29,960 --> 01:24:32,524
For a neurotic hypochondriac with panic attacks,
1893
01:24:32,627 --> 01:24:35,149
he was really uninhibited.
1894
01:24:35,252 --> 01:24:37,607
So what? Out of the four dudes in the house,
1895
01:24:37,607 --> 01:24:41,127
I didn't even rank in the top two?
That's what you're telling me?
1896
01:24:41,127 --> 01:24:42,316
Didn't I do my move?
1897
01:24:42,418 --> 01:24:45,191
The move with the fingers and the tongue?
The Thoosh?
1898
01:24:46,326 --> 01:24:47,149
Laura.
1899
01:24:47,252 --> 01:24:48,763
Come on, I thooshed you. I know I did.
1900
01:24:48,763 --> 01:24:50,274
You don't need to do it now.
1901
01:24:50,377 --> 01:24:52,107
You did it last night.
We don't need to see it again.
1902
01:24:52,210 --> 01:24:53,982
Yeah.
Can we just eat breakfast?
1903
01:24:56,668 --> 01:24:57,732
It's Marcus.
1904
01:25:01,127 --> 01:25:02,566
Hello?
1905
01:25:03,502 --> 01:25:05,399
Oh, tell him how much we missed him last night.
1906
01:25:07,168 --> 01:25:08,732
Hey.
Everybody's up.
1907
01:25:08,835 --> 01:25:09,941
Hey.
1908
01:25:10,043 --> 01:25:11,316
Morning.
1909
01:25:11,418 --> 01:25:13,899
Hey, man,
about the shit that went down last night...
1910
01:25:14,002 --> 01:25:18,441
Dude. Oh, shit, I'm sorry if I did anything
weird to you or Willow, like, any thooshing.
1911
01:25:18,543 --> 01:25:22,732
Anything like that. I'm sorry.
I was so fucking hammered, I don't remember anything.
1912
01:25:22,835 --> 01:25:23,941
Seriously, nothing?
1913
01:25:24,043 --> 01:25:25,293
You don't remember anything?
1914
01:25:25,293 --> 01:25:26,107
No.
1915
01:25:26,210 --> 01:25:29,816
Nothing.
I remember the fucking absinthe shots and then that's it.
1916
01:25:29,918 --> 01:25:34,399
I'm so bummed, that was gonna be spank
fodder for the next 20 years of my life.
1917
01:25:34,502 --> 01:25:35,701
Total fucking blackout.
1918
01:25:35,701 --> 01:25:36,899
Thank God
1919
01:25:37,002 --> 01:25:38,274
Amen.
1920
01:25:38,377 --> 01:25:39,524
I got something for you.
1921
01:25:39,627 --> 01:25:40,701
Holy shit!
1922
01:25:40,701 --> 01:25:41,774
Dougie.
1923
01:25:41,877 --> 01:25:43,607
I did it.
I got more coming for everybody else.
1924
01:25:43,710 --> 01:25:45,566
Oh, my God, dude,
this is major.
1925
01:25:45,668 --> 01:25:50,399
I wanted hat,
but he was so passionate about no hat.
1926
01:25:50,502 --> 01:25:51,534
No fucking hat.
1927
01:25:51,534 --> 01:25:52,566
Good shit, man.
1928
01:25:52,668 --> 01:25:54,857
Altough, I still would've Photoshopped in the dudes
1929
01:25:54,960 --> 01:25:57,191
schnizzing on your face.
But it's just me.
1930
01:25:57,293 --> 01:25:58,774
You made fucking shirts.
Fuck.
1931
01:25:58,877 --> 01:26:01,357
Yeah. Hey, Willow,
grab one of those.
1932
01:26:01,460 --> 01:26:03,357
It's blue and pink,
my favorite.
1933
01:26:03,460 --> 01:26:04,950
A medium. Awesome.
1934
01:26:04,950 --> 01:26:06,440
Well, well, well,
It's the Breakfast Club.
1935
01:26:06,543 --> 01:26:09,315
Oh, there he is.
Sam Rockwell.
1936
01:26:09,418 --> 01:26:11,690
Ha, yeah,
there you go.
1937
01:26:13,460 --> 01:26:15,774
Thank you, I'm sorry, and you're welcome.
1938
01:26:18,543 --> 01:26:19,774
Still a little sore.
1939
01:26:23,210 --> 01:26:24,315
Hi.
1940
01:26:25,626 --> 01:26:28,232
Yeah, I think we're headed down shortly.
1941
01:26:29,085 --> 01:26:30,940
Yeah, I'll see you there.
1942
01:26:32,001 --> 01:26:33,242
That was Kelly.
1943
01:26:33,242 --> 01:26:34,482
Slut.
1944
01:26:35,482 --> 01:26:37,804
Uh, she's, uh,
1945
01:26:37,804 --> 01:26:40,126
headed to the beach. I'm gonna meet her.
1946
01:26:39,126 --> 01:26:42,190
That's gonna be some awkward shit.
I wanna be front-row center.
1947
01:26:42,293 --> 01:26:43,982
Let's do it.
I'm there.
1948
01:26:45,376 --> 01:26:47,482
Give the ticks a goodbye hug for me, please?
1949
01:26:47,585 --> 01:26:48,617
I will do so.
1950
01:26:48,617 --> 01:26:49,649
Okay.
1951
01:26:55,085 --> 01:26:58,565
I can stay here and hang out with you if...
1952
01:26:58,668 --> 01:27:00,482
Yeah, yes.
1953
01:27:00,626 --> 01:27:01,774
Okay, heh.
1954
01:27:01,876 --> 01:27:05,315
We could, uh,
take a dip in the pool or something.
1955
01:27:05,418 --> 01:27:07,482
Oh, the... Yeah.
I don't know about the pool
1956
01:27:07,585 --> 01:27:09,774
after what happened in there last night.
1957
01:27:11,418 --> 01:27:14,274
But you wanna do the crossword with me?
1958
01:27:15,043 --> 01:27:16,440
I'd love that.
1959
01:27:18,585 --> 01:27:20,399
Uh, 16 Across.
1960
01:27:22,185 --> 01:27:25,249
So, what happened with, uh, you-know-who?
1961
01:27:25,351 --> 01:27:27,051
Marcus apologized for everything.
1962
01:27:27,051 --> 01:27:28,551
He wants to go to couples therapy.
1963
01:27:28,551 --> 01:27:29,832
You're getting back together?
1964
01:27:29,935 --> 01:27:33,124
We're gonna go to city hall,
get married, see if we can make it work.
1965
01:27:33,226 --> 01:27:34,217
What the fuck?
1966
01:27:34,217 --> 01:27:35,207
Just kidding.
1967
01:27:36,643 --> 01:27:40,665
Okay. Yeah, no,
it's totally over.
1968
01:27:40,768 --> 01:27:42,749
Nice.
I'm proud of you.
1969
01:27:42,851 --> 01:27:44,165
Thanks, Sue.
1970
01:27:44,268 --> 01:27:46,665
That's too bad.
I always liked that guy.
1971
01:27:47,310 --> 01:27:49,457
God, I hope Kate has some guys for us.
1972
01:27:49,560 --> 01:27:51,665
Hell, I'd even go to Hoboken.
1973
01:27:51,768 --> 01:27:54,957
I mean, if he's really amazing,
I'd consider going to Jersey City.
1974
01:27:55,060 --> 01:27:56,165
Oh, you would not.
1975
01:27:56,268 --> 01:27:58,332
I'm just making a point.
1976
01:27:58,435 --> 01:28:01,165
Uh, so Eric, um,
last night,
1977
01:28:01,268 --> 01:28:02,874
Some things came up.
1978
01:28:02,976 --> 01:28:05,499
Yeah, I swear.
I had no idea.
1979
01:28:05,001 --> 01:28:07,274
No, it's fine, really.
It was just something
1980
01:28:07,376 --> 01:28:09,399
that I needed to get out of my system.
1981
01:28:16,710 --> 01:28:18,565
I hope she likes my sloppy seconds.
1982
01:28:18,668 --> 01:28:20,607
Oh, come on.
1983
01:28:21,585 --> 01:28:23,096
Morning, Kelly.
1984
01:28:23,096 --> 01:28:24,607
Hey. Morning, Eric.
1985
01:28:24,710 --> 01:28:26,524
Hey.
1986
01:28:26,626 --> 01:28:28,565
Hi Kelly, I'm Mike.
We haven't officially met.
1987
01:28:28,668 --> 01:28:29,762
Nice to meet you.
1988
01:28:29,762 --> 01:28:30,857
Oh, wait, Mike.
1989
01:28:30,960 --> 01:28:34,065
Right.
You're the guy that Dody was asking about.
1990
01:28:34,168 --> 01:28:37,690
She wanted your number for some
kind of business thing or something?
1991
01:28:39,710 --> 01:28:42,190
Ah, what the fuck.
Give her my digits, all right?
1992
01:28:42,293 --> 01:28:44,399
Nice to meet you.
1993
01:28:44,501 --> 01:28:48,190
Let loose the Kraken.
Yeah.
1994
01:28:48,293 --> 01:28:51,107
So wow. Okay.
1995
01:28:51,107 --> 01:28:52,107
About last night.
1996
01:28:52,107 --> 01:28:52,992
How about this?
1997
01:28:52,992 --> 01:28:53,692
What?
1998
01:28:53,692 --> 01:28:55,492
How about this about last night?
1999
01:28:56,192 --> 01:28:59,326
We never talk about it ever, ever again.
2000
01:28:59,326 --> 01:29:00,974
It never happened.
All right?
2001
01:29:01,535 --> 01:29:03,349
You and I have just met.
2002
01:29:03,451 --> 01:29:05,932
We're starting fresh right here,
right now.
2003
01:29:07,451 --> 01:29:09,015
Done.
2004
01:29:10,451 --> 01:29:11,451
Hi, I'm Kelly.
2005
01:29:11,451 --> 01:29:12,551
Hi, Kelly. I'm Eric.
2006
01:29:12,551 --> 01:29:13,151
It's nice to meet you.
2007
01:29:13,151 --> 01:29:14,015
Nice to meet you.
2008
01:29:25,451 --> 01:29:26,682
Hey!
2009
01:29:32,849 --> 01:29:35,049
Your blackberry!
2010
01:29:34,826 --> 01:29:37,598
Ah!
Just an empty symbolic gesture.
2011
01:29:37,701 --> 01:29:39,265
I'm getting a new one on Tuesday.
2012
01:29:39,565 --> 01:29:42,346
But that did
feel really, really good.
2013
01:29:42,546 --> 01:29:45,326
So this is the beach, huh?
2014
01:29:44,826 --> 01:29:46,390
Pretty beautiful.
Who knew?
2015
01:29:46,493 --> 01:29:47,483
This is it.
2016
01:29:47,483 --> 01:29:48,473
Let's go on.
2017
01:29:54,201 --> 01:29:56,015
Okay, listen. I've got some bad news.
2018
01:29:56,015 --> 01:29:57,065
You're al Qaeda.
2019
01:29:57,065 --> 01:29:57,826
No.
2020
01:29:57,826 --> 01:30:00,223
You know the delay I pulled with closing the house?
2021
01:30:00,326 --> 01:30:02,307
It spooked the buyers and they pulled out.
2022
01:30:03,868 --> 01:30:04,668
The house isn't sold, yet?
2023
01:30:04,668 --> 01:30:05,182
No.
2024
01:30:07,493 --> 01:30:08,483
Are you mad?
2025
01:30:08,483 --> 01:30:09,473
No. No, no, no.
2026
01:30:09,576 --> 01:30:11,140
Will you hold on a sec though?
2027
01:30:11,243 --> 01:30:11,837
Hey, guys!
2028
01:30:11,837 --> 01:30:12,432
Yeah?
2029
01:30:12,534 --> 01:30:15,182
Quick announcement.
I have a really shitty Realtor.
2030
01:30:15,284 --> 01:30:16,296
Fire her!
2031
01:30:16,296 --> 01:30:17,307
And she blew the deal.
2032
01:30:17,409 --> 01:30:19,307
And the house still isn't sold.
2033
01:30:23,743 --> 01:30:24,400
They're pissed.
2034
01:30:24,400 --> 01:30:25,057
They're really mad.
2035
01:30:25,159 --> 01:30:26,274
Great, now they're pissed.
2036
01:30:26,274 --> 01:30:27,390
They're mad.
2037
01:30:27,493 --> 01:30:31,140
Now I got shirt thinking of
something to do for Memorial Day.
2038
01:30:31,243 --> 01:30:33,765
We've been kicking around this idea for a brown party.
2039
01:30:33,868 --> 01:30:35,932
You know brown clothes,
brown food.
2040
01:30:37,868 --> 01:30:40,015
Hey, you guys remember Kelly, right?
2041
01:31:19,625 --> 01:31:20,800
What do you want?
2042
01:31:20,916 --> 01:31:22,633
Password's roundelay.
2043
01:31:22,750 --> 01:31:23,883
Who's your connection?
2044
01:31:24,000 --> 01:31:25,633
Dody Henderson. She's our Realtor.
2045
01:31:25,633 --> 01:31:27,833
Oh, Dody. Yeah, she's in the swing.
2046
01:31:27,833 --> 01:31:30,425
Come on in.
Come on, you too.
2047
01:31:34,050 --> 01:31:35,350
Yeah. Okay.
2048
01:32:20,041 --> 01:32:22,008
<i>You say he's just a friend</i>
2049
01:32:22,125 --> 01:32:25,133
<i>Oh, baby, you</i>
2050
01:32:25,250 --> 01:32:28,050
<i>You got what I need</i>
2051
01:32:28,166 --> 01:32:29,258
What?!
2052
01:32:29,375 --> 01:32:31,216
<i>But you say He's just a friend</i>
2053
01:32:31,333 --> 01:32:34,050
<i>What, what But you say he's just a friend</i>
2054
01:32:34,166 --> 01:32:36,633
<i>Oh, baby you</i>
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