1
00:00:09,478 --> 00:00:12,311
- And you're sure about this?
- Yes.
2
00:00:12,518 --> 00:00:15,794
You're 34, you've got four more
attractive years in you -
3
00:00:15,998 --> 00:00:18,990
- to attract someone
you can breed with.
4
00:00:19,198 --> 00:00:21,792
I'm not breeding with anyone.
5
00:00:21,998 --> 00:00:24,990
- Are you a lesbian?
- No.
6
00:00:25,198 --> 00:00:27,587
Aha. Then I don't get it.
7
00:00:30,038 --> 00:00:33,314
My ex waited five years
before he told me -
8
00:00:33,518 --> 00:00:36,271
- that he didn't want children.
9
00:00:36,478 --> 00:00:39,151
Now, the plan is to have a baby.
10
00:00:39,358 --> 00:00:43,590
I then expect to be ready to meet
a man in about two years' time.
11
00:00:44,318 --> 00:00:46,513
Will you prep her?
12
00:00:49,958 --> 00:00:52,870
- Oh my god, you're on TV!
- Yes.
13
00:00:53,078 --> 00:00:56,150
I can't believe you're lying here!
Don't move.
14
00:00:58,398 --> 00:01:01,231
- You're really good.
- Oh, thanks.
15
00:01:01,438 --> 00:01:04,953
No, good at not moving.
I don't like the show.
16
00:01:05,158 --> 00:01:09,754
You make people cry just because
they've spent too much money.
17
00:01:11,038 --> 00:01:14,189
- And you've chosen a good donor?
- Yes.
18
00:01:15,718 --> 00:01:20,428
- He's 35 years old...
- I'll get the sperm and the doctor.
19
00:01:20,638 --> 00:01:24,950
Just relax. Would you care to
listen to some calming dolphins?
20
00:01:25,158 --> 00:01:28,753
- No thanks.
- They are really relaxing.
21
00:02:39,678 --> 00:02:41,191
Hello?
22
00:02:43,638 --> 00:02:45,549
Peekaboo!
23
00:02:46,678 --> 00:02:49,238
- Hi, mum.
- Hi, honey.
24
00:02:49,438 --> 00:02:52,794
- It's so good to see you.
- Birgit?
25
00:02:52,998 --> 00:02:56,673
- Did you price...
- Yes, I did price the bird houses.
26
00:02:56,878 --> 00:02:59,950
- Where's Karen and the kids?
- In the back.
27
00:03:00,158 --> 00:03:05,073
- Hi, dad.
- Hi, sweetie. Lovely to see you.
28
00:03:05,918 --> 00:03:07,749
Adam, die!
29
00:03:10,158 --> 00:03:13,116
- Got you!
- Upsadaisy. Get up, honey.
30
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:16,151
- Got you!
- It was a stupid game.
31
00:03:16,358 --> 00:03:20,749
- Yes, aunt Anne is so stupid.
- It was a really stupid game.
32
00:03:20,958 --> 00:03:24,314
- Go to granddad.
- Go out and get some candy.
33
00:03:27,558 --> 00:03:31,187
- They're as clumsy as their dad.
- They'll outgrow it.
34
00:03:31,398 --> 00:03:34,913
No, just look at Laus.
He's still a real clown.
35
00:03:35,798 --> 00:03:38,153
Will you bring me the wine?
36
00:03:38,358 --> 00:03:41,953
Hey, it's only
the first three months.
37
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:46,828
Thanks a lot.
38
00:03:48,038 --> 00:03:51,394
So how's the breeding project
coming along?
39
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:53,873
It's coming along fine.
40
00:03:55,358 --> 00:03:58,589
I really don't get it.
That you want children.
41
00:03:59,438 --> 00:04:01,827
That anyone wants children.
42
00:04:02,038 --> 00:04:06,316
You can't say that when you've got
nearly four children yourself.
43
00:04:06,918 --> 00:04:10,433
- It would be better with a father.
- Why?
44
00:04:10,638 --> 00:04:14,187
But I can't wait around
until I'm 70.
45
00:04:14,398 --> 00:04:17,117
Everything's gonna be all right.
46
00:04:22,638 --> 00:04:25,675
You'll be the world's greatest mum.
And dad.
47
00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:31,750
Are we going to eat soon or what?
I'm starving.
48
00:04:31,958 --> 00:04:35,507
- Is Karen having a glass?
- Dad! Mum!
49
00:04:35,718 --> 00:04:38,471
It's only the first three months.
50
00:04:39,118 --> 00:04:41,268
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
51
00:04:41,478 --> 00:04:44,595
It is the wine
from that place, right?
52
00:04:44,798 --> 00:04:48,427
- Or is it the other one?
- No, it's the one we prefer.
53
00:04:51,998 --> 00:04:54,876
I think I'll just sit down.
54
00:04:56,398 --> 00:04:58,912
I'm not really giving a speech.
55
00:04:59,118 --> 00:05:03,589
I just want to tell you that...
I'm pregnant.
56
00:05:06,918 --> 00:05:11,628
Come here, my little Anne.
And it was your very first try.
57
00:05:11,838 --> 00:05:14,671
- I'm getting all...
- Here, my friend.
58
00:05:14,878 --> 00:05:17,950
I'm really happy for you, but...
59
00:05:18,158 --> 00:05:21,230
- I'm having contractions.
- Really, Karen?
60
00:05:21,438 --> 00:05:24,510
- Dad, are you able to drive?
- Yes... yes.
61
00:05:25,678 --> 00:05:26,872
Yes.
62
00:05:27,598 --> 00:05:30,476
- Has she given birth?
- No, not yet.
63
00:05:30,678 --> 00:05:35,513
- Where is she? Hi, Anne.
- Here, here, here.
64
00:05:39,758 --> 00:05:42,556
This is it! Push!
65
00:05:50,158 --> 00:05:53,275
- She looks exactly like her dad.
- Yes.
66
00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,675
- You look like daddy.
- Yeah, I'll say...
67
00:05:56,878 --> 00:06:00,473
- I just mean...
- I know what you mean.
68
00:06:00,678 --> 00:06:03,317
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
69
00:06:04,558 --> 00:06:08,073
- He's the spitting image of his dad.
- She! She is.
70
00:06:09,398 --> 00:06:12,071
- She looks like daddy.
- Never mind.
71
00:06:12,278 --> 00:06:16,988
- Daddy's little girl.
- Will you shut up, Laus!
72
00:06:23,318 --> 00:06:26,708
Can I ask you a question?
Or are you delivering a baby?
73
00:06:26,918 --> 00:06:29,034
I'm walking down the hall.
74
00:06:29,238 --> 00:06:33,754
- It sounds weird, but I'm pregnant.
- We see that a lot here.
75
00:06:33,958 --> 00:06:37,746
I've been reading up on it,
and women tend to get hormonal.
76
00:06:37,958 --> 00:06:42,076
Add to that, that the father
is an anonymous sperm donor.
77
00:06:42,278 --> 00:06:46,032
I haven't met him.
But I'm starting to wonder -
78
00:06:46,238 --> 00:06:48,911
- how strong his genes are.
79
00:06:49,118 --> 00:06:53,908
What if there's something wrong
with him that wasn't in his file?
80
00:06:55,278 --> 00:06:58,827
What if the baby only looks like him
and not like me?
81
00:06:59,038 --> 00:07:03,190
I'm normal. I'm sensible.
What if he's...
82
00:07:05,038 --> 00:07:07,393
So my question is:
83
00:07:07,598 --> 00:07:12,388
Don't they say that environment
means more than inheritance?
84
00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:15,351
- Yes, they say so.
- Okay!
85
00:07:15,558 --> 00:07:21,190
But it's a myth.
The genes decide everything.
86
00:07:28,958 --> 00:07:32,507
If you follow this plan,
you'll be out of debt in four years.
87
00:07:32,718 --> 00:07:37,269
But you need to stick to the plan
and not miss one single payment.
88
00:07:38,478 --> 00:07:43,472
- Are you ready to reach you goal?
- Yes! It's fantastic.
89
00:07:43,678 --> 00:07:46,636
"Consumed".
Watch it here on TV2.
90
00:07:46,838 --> 00:07:50,751
If you don't control your life,
your life controls you.
91
00:08:00,038 --> 00:08:03,189
- Good morning, Anne.
- Good morning, Sandra.
92
00:08:03,398 --> 00:08:06,834
- Sorry I'm late.
- Don't fret it.
93
00:08:07,038 --> 00:08:10,314
Somebody overslept, perhaps?
Naked?
94
00:08:14,078 --> 00:08:15,670
Saucy bastard.
95
00:08:16,158 --> 00:08:18,956
Pass it around, pass it around.
96
00:08:19,758 --> 00:08:24,832
Around, please! Our share of
female viewers keeps falling.
97
00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:28,508
We're beaten by
"Homes Under the Hammer".
98
00:08:28,718 --> 00:08:32,631
What does that show have
which we miss? Ken!
99
00:08:34,678 --> 00:08:36,634
- Houses?
- Ken!!
100
00:08:36,838 --> 00:08:38,794
I don't know, then.
101
00:08:39,398 --> 00:08:42,151
It has a male host.
102
00:08:42,358 --> 00:08:45,270
Male host.
103
00:08:45,478 --> 00:08:47,992
So we need that as well.
104
00:08:48,198 --> 00:08:51,474
Anne, wait a minute. You're the host.
105
00:08:51,678 --> 00:08:54,795
Anne's the host.
You get a co-host.
106
00:08:54,998 --> 00:08:56,909
A vice presenter.
107
00:08:57,118 --> 00:08:59,996
The female viewers
want to look at men.
108
00:09:00,198 --> 00:09:03,315
Apparently!
That's the word from above.
109
00:09:03,518 --> 00:09:06,271
"We need men." "Okay, we comply."
110
00:09:06,478 --> 00:09:09,629
And then we dance.
To their tune.
111
00:09:09,838 --> 00:09:13,433
Jan, you can come in now!
You know him as a real estate agent.
112
00:09:13,638 --> 00:09:16,994
We've hijacked Jan Storm
to "Consumed".
113
00:09:17,198 --> 00:09:19,712
- Hi.
- Great to see you.
114
00:09:19,918 --> 00:09:24,514
You look so good! You've lost weight
and they've made a good job of that.
115
00:09:24,718 --> 00:09:27,835
- They removed eight mm.
- You can't even tell!
116
00:09:28,038 --> 00:09:31,872
- Well, you know me, of course.
- Hi. I'm Siv from make-up.
117
00:09:32,078 --> 00:09:35,707
- Well, you know me, right?
- No.
118
00:09:35,918 --> 00:09:39,149
Hello, ladies!
Sandra, the captain's on board.
119
00:09:39,358 --> 00:09:42,509
- Let's turn this ship around.
- Let's.
120
00:09:42,718 --> 00:09:45,471
Okay, girls.
121
00:09:49,158 --> 00:09:51,911
She's so bloody annoying!
122
00:09:52,118 --> 00:09:56,987
- You're not going to quit, are you?
- No, not now. I'm pregnant.
123
00:09:57,198 --> 00:10:00,031
I don't like it when you get mad.
124
00:10:00,238 --> 00:10:04,390
All that anger
is not good for the baby.
125
00:10:05,838 --> 00:10:09,433
I really believe
it's gonna work out fine with Jan.
126
00:10:09,638 --> 00:10:12,869
Such great hair.
I actually think he's nice.
127
00:10:13,078 --> 00:10:16,468
- You think all men are nice.
- Well, they are.
128
00:10:17,638 --> 00:10:20,675
- What about Rubio?
- Rubio?
129
00:10:22,158 --> 00:10:24,353
Rubio... Yeah.
130
00:10:25,478 --> 00:10:28,834
- What's the time, Siv?
- I don't know.
131
00:10:29,678 --> 00:10:32,238
And why don't you know?
132
00:10:32,438 --> 00:10:35,828
Because Rubio stole your watch, Siv.
133
00:10:36,438 --> 00:10:38,269
- No.
- Yes.
134
00:10:39,278 --> 00:10:42,987
But only because
he didn't believe in time.
135
00:10:43,198 --> 00:10:46,747
In his clan, they look at the sun
to tell the time.
136
00:10:46,958 --> 00:10:50,837
- It's customary where he's from.
- Where's Rubio from?
137
00:10:51,038 --> 00:10:52,517
Hedehusene.
138
00:10:52,718 --> 00:10:57,075
You've got to be more careful
about who you let into your life!
139
00:10:57,278 --> 00:11:00,076
Who you let into you.
140
00:11:00,278 --> 00:11:03,509
- Into your inner parts.
- Yes.
141
00:11:03,718 --> 00:11:05,993
Into, into, into...
142
00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:14,347
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
143
00:11:14,558 --> 00:11:17,231
It's just...
144
00:11:17,438 --> 00:11:21,954
What if the baby
isn't anything like me?
145
00:11:22,158 --> 00:11:26,151
What if it looks like
some complete stranger?
146
00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:30,308
Just remember that...
147
00:11:30,518 --> 00:11:34,272
...a stranger is a man
you've yet to meet.
148
00:11:35,158 --> 00:11:37,114
Right?
149
00:11:44,238 --> 00:11:46,547
- Hi.
- Hi there!
150
00:11:46,758 --> 00:11:49,989
We're closed.
We close early on Thursdays.
151
00:11:50,198 --> 00:11:54,430
I'm just chilling, playing solitaire.
Can I help you with anything?
152
00:11:54,638 --> 00:11:56,310
- Yes.
- Yes?
153
00:11:59,038 --> 00:12:01,268
I've made a mistake.
154
00:12:01,478 --> 00:12:05,027
I've regretted
that I chose an anonymous donor.
155
00:12:05,238 --> 00:12:09,516
I wanted to hear if there's some way
I can get a look at him?
156
00:12:09,718 --> 00:12:14,712
Just to check that everything's okay
and he's not odd or anything.
157
00:12:14,918 --> 00:12:17,352
I see everyone who comes here.
158
00:12:17,558 --> 00:12:20,834
If he was odd,
I would have noticed.
159
00:12:24,398 --> 00:12:29,313
I don't even need his name.
If I can just get his address.
160
00:12:29,518 --> 00:12:31,588
It's not allowed.
161
00:12:33,438 --> 00:12:38,432
I mean, I'm... I'm willing to pay
for the information.
162
00:12:38,638 --> 00:12:42,597
- God, no! There's no need for that.
- Okay.
163
00:12:42,798 --> 00:12:46,427
The child can contact the donor
when it's 18. For free.
164
00:12:46,638 --> 00:12:51,268
- 18! In 18 years and 8 months...
- They'll fly by. Liquorice fish?
165
00:12:52,798 --> 00:12:54,436
No thanks.
166
00:12:56,958 --> 00:12:58,994
- Plan B.
- Oh, well.
167
00:13:09,358 --> 00:13:11,155
- Hi.
- Hi.
168
00:13:11,918 --> 00:13:15,308
Could I by any chance
use your toilet?
169
00:13:15,518 --> 00:13:18,828
You need to pee all the time
when you're pregnant.
170
00:13:19,038 --> 00:13:21,632
- Yes. It's over there.
- Thanks.
171
00:13:21,838 --> 00:13:23,829
You're welcome.
172
00:13:25,318 --> 00:13:27,388
Oh...
173
00:13:32,918 --> 00:13:35,557
Can I get you to come with me?
174
00:13:35,758 --> 00:13:41,116
It's so hard for me to bend down
when I need to pee.
175
00:13:41,318 --> 00:13:45,391
When I need to take off
my tights and panties, you know.
176
00:13:46,678 --> 00:13:50,148
- You only need to pee, right?
- You never know.
177
00:13:50,358 --> 00:13:52,872
I think it's only pee.
178
00:13:53,078 --> 00:13:55,228
But you never know.
179
00:13:59,958 --> 00:14:02,108
Password? Shit.
180
00:14:04,278 --> 00:14:06,109
Baby?
181
00:14:07,198 --> 00:14:09,871
Fuck.
Okay, okay.
182
00:14:10,078 --> 00:14:11,989
Semen? Sperm?
183
00:14:14,878 --> 00:14:16,516
Sperm? No.
184
00:14:17,318 --> 00:14:19,878
Pregnant? No. Mum?
185
00:14:25,398 --> 00:14:27,116
Dolphin!
186
00:14:31,078 --> 00:14:33,228
Yes! Okay...
187
00:14:36,758 --> 00:14:39,989
There he is!
Address! There.
188
00:14:53,358 --> 00:14:55,553
Thank you so much.
189
00:14:55,758 --> 00:14:58,477
What does he look like?
Is he cute?
190
00:14:58,678 --> 00:15:02,387
I don't know.
I only got his address.
191
00:15:02,598 --> 00:15:06,307
Isn't it crazy? Your happiness
relies on who it is.
192
00:15:06,518 --> 00:15:08,429
And if he's home.
193
00:15:51,798 --> 00:15:55,677
- Oh... Is it today?
- Yes.
194
00:15:57,678 --> 00:16:00,192
Do you want to come in?
195
00:16:01,438 --> 00:16:04,589
I'm sorry
I didn't hear the door.
196
00:16:05,238 --> 00:16:09,356
I was just transferring money
to my sponsor child. Great kid.
197
00:16:14,358 --> 00:16:16,633
Let me have a look.
198
00:16:17,798 --> 00:16:20,028
Yes, I thought so...
199
00:16:20,238 --> 00:16:24,390
Here you are. I'm afraid
it's all I've got. I hope it's okay?
200
00:16:26,158 --> 00:16:30,197
- It's perfect.
- You've got to lend a helping hand.
201
00:16:32,278 --> 00:16:36,237
- Tell me if you need collectors.
- For what?
202
00:16:36,918 --> 00:16:39,352
- For the...
- Oh, of course.
203
00:16:39,558 --> 00:16:42,948
I'll give you my name.
You can add me to the register.
204
00:16:46,758 --> 00:16:51,513
- I'm Rune Winding Koppel.
- I'm Anne Rasmussen.
205
00:16:53,078 --> 00:16:56,309
- Hi, Anne.
- Hi.
206
00:16:57,118 --> 00:17:00,554
And the address is Broagergade 3E.
207
00:17:04,998 --> 00:17:06,909
E?
208
00:17:08,158 --> 00:17:11,036
- You mean F.
- I mean E.
209
00:17:13,078 --> 00:17:17,469
- Are you totally sure?
- Positive. F is in the corner.
210
00:17:19,758 --> 00:17:21,430
Oh.
211
00:17:21,638 --> 00:17:26,712
Well, then I'll just...
get on with the collection.
212
00:17:27,678 --> 00:17:29,316
Yes.
213
00:17:29,518 --> 00:17:33,431
People often get confused.
The signs could be better.
214
00:17:35,438 --> 00:17:37,827
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
215
00:17:38,038 --> 00:17:42,873
What?! Stop it right now! I'm just
sitting here... It's four o'clock!
216
00:17:43,078 --> 00:17:46,309
Can't a man jerk off in peace?
217
00:17:47,678 --> 00:17:50,715
- Huh?
- I'm just beating the bishop.
218
00:17:51,758 --> 00:17:55,512
Hey, you're on that TV show.
Did I win anything?
219
00:17:55,718 --> 00:17:59,950
- Anne's collecting for charity.
- For charity, okay.
220
00:18:00,158 --> 00:18:04,356
Well, I wouldn't mind
being charitable to your tits.
221
00:18:09,998 --> 00:18:13,388
I'll be right there, Dolly.
I'm just...
222
00:18:13,598 --> 00:18:15,668
...scoring a bird.
223
00:18:28,118 --> 00:18:30,632
It's good, right?
224
00:18:30,838 --> 00:18:35,036
- The kids are playing with the rake.
- It's okay. Laus is with them.
225
00:18:36,878 --> 00:18:38,914
Or maybe...
226
00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:48,549
I couldn't go through with
the anonymity. I hacked into...
227
00:18:49,718 --> 00:18:55,190
- I found out who the donor was.
- Anne, really!
228
00:18:55,398 --> 00:18:58,674
- What?
- Well, it's a crime.
229
00:19:00,198 --> 00:19:03,156
I believe
he's the world's biggest asshole.
230
00:19:03,358 --> 00:19:07,397
Well, he's been jerking off
into a cup for free, so...
231
00:19:07,598 --> 00:19:11,034
- No, they get 500 kroner.
- But still.
232
00:19:12,718 --> 00:19:15,232
- Did you talk to him?
- No.
233
00:19:15,438 --> 00:19:18,874
- Then how do you know?
- Because I saw him.
234
00:19:19,078 --> 00:19:21,387
He's totally...
235
00:19:22,718 --> 00:19:25,278
- What did you do?
- I ran.
236
00:19:25,478 --> 00:19:29,790
You didn't just run off?
You know better than that.
237
00:19:29,998 --> 00:19:33,035
You can't count on
first impressions.
238
00:19:33,238 --> 00:19:37,151
Do you remember
when I first met Laus?
239
00:19:37,358 --> 00:19:40,828
I thought he was both intelligent
and a great lay.
240
00:19:43,118 --> 00:19:45,951
You really can't count on that.
241
00:19:48,638 --> 00:19:50,071
Anne?
242
00:19:50,278 --> 00:19:54,794
Imagine a man even sexier
than you could ever imagine.
243
00:19:57,358 --> 00:19:59,747
I've just met that man.
244
00:20:02,478 --> 00:20:06,596
- Okay.
- His name's Besnik. He's a Romani.
245
00:20:06,798 --> 00:20:10,268
We got talking
when he was stealing my bike.
246
00:20:10,478 --> 00:20:14,073
- What?
- It was meant to be.
247
00:20:14,278 --> 00:20:17,509
We're going out for dinner tonight.
On Amager.
248
00:20:18,678 --> 00:20:21,476
Gosh, how do I get there?
249
00:20:21,678 --> 00:20:24,397
- Are there busses?
- There he is!
250
00:20:29,638 --> 00:20:32,198
He looks nice.
251
00:20:39,678 --> 00:20:41,430
Poor thing.
252
00:20:50,678 --> 00:20:53,476
Come on. We're off now. Right?
253
00:21:11,078 --> 00:21:14,627
Did you see that?
He took money off a homeless guy!
254
00:21:52,358 --> 00:21:53,950
Goal!
255
00:21:54,158 --> 00:21:57,275
- Did you see that?
- It was just a seagull.
256
00:21:57,478 --> 00:22:02,268
No, no! It's just that the seagulls
eat the ducks' food.
257
00:22:02,478 --> 00:22:06,187
- He's not normal!
- But that's just on the outside.
258
00:22:06,398 --> 00:22:09,788
Like those wooden Russian dolls
with dolls inside.
259
00:22:09,998 --> 00:22:12,796
- Babooshkas?
- Yes.
260
00:22:12,998 --> 00:22:15,432
If you gave him half a chance, -
261
00:22:15,638 --> 00:22:18,994
- there might be
a smaller idiot inside.
262
00:22:19,198 --> 00:22:23,077
And then an even smaller one.
In the end, there's a tiny idiot -
263
00:22:23,278 --> 00:22:26,111
- who's actually really cute.
264
00:22:26,318 --> 00:22:30,106
Are you following me all day?
Are you a stalker?
265
00:22:30,318 --> 00:22:34,152
- Hi. Gordon Dennis.
- Siv. And this is Anne.
266
00:22:34,358 --> 00:22:38,271
I know I'm a dreamboat,
but you don't stand a chance.
267
00:22:38,478 --> 00:22:43,347
Joke, man. You totally stand
a chance. I'll jump anyone...
268
00:22:44,438 --> 00:22:48,226
Then maybe the two of you
should go out for dinner?
269
00:22:48,438 --> 00:22:51,953
Give each other a chance.
Anne wants to get to know you.
270
00:22:52,158 --> 00:22:56,549
- I don't want to get to know him.
- Babooshka babooshka
271
00:22:56,758 --> 00:23:01,752
It's not a good idea, Siv. We have
that thing... We need to go now.
272
00:23:04,518 --> 00:23:06,236
Babooshka babooshka
273
00:23:06,438 --> 00:23:08,633
Okay, okay, okay!
274
00:23:11,198 --> 00:23:13,553
You want to go for dinner?
275
00:23:13,758 --> 00:23:16,716
- You want to go for dinner?
- Your treat?
276
00:23:16,918 --> 00:23:18,397
Yes.
277
00:23:18,598 --> 00:23:22,113
Definitely! See you.
I know where you live!
278
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:26,550
I mean, you know where I live.
You were there. At my place.
279
00:23:34,518 --> 00:23:37,078
- Pussy!
- No, no, no.
280
00:24:01,398 --> 00:24:02,911
Hi.
281
00:24:03,158 --> 00:24:05,592
God, hi.
282
00:24:06,998 --> 00:24:09,353
- You look...
- What?
283
00:24:10,038 --> 00:24:12,871
- Are you going out?
- No.
284
00:24:13,078 --> 00:24:15,308
- Yes.
- Okay.
285
00:24:16,478 --> 00:24:19,993
- Which one?
- I'm going out for dinner.
286
00:24:20,198 --> 00:24:23,429
- Italian.
- Delicious.
287
00:24:23,638 --> 00:24:28,553
Saltimbocca. Have you had that?
A classic Roman calves liver dish.
288
00:24:28,758 --> 00:24:33,229
Classic Roman calves liver dish.
Six sick hicks nick Brad Pitt.
289
00:24:35,518 --> 00:24:38,396
- Huh?
- No.
290
00:24:42,318 --> 00:24:46,789
Hey! Great, you're here.
I'm bloody starving.
291
00:24:47,558 --> 00:24:51,676
Rune... You might want to
stay out of the toilet for a while.
292
00:24:51,878 --> 00:24:56,269
Something's wrong with the pipes.
Apparently you can't wash out dirt.
293
00:24:58,038 --> 00:25:00,154
Oh, well... Shall we?
294
00:25:03,238 --> 00:25:05,752
Coming through here
295
00:25:29,158 --> 00:25:33,117
Buying and selling. My speciality
has always been Puch 3 speed.
296
00:25:33,318 --> 00:25:36,310
I've never been into
the other Puchs.
297
00:25:36,518 --> 00:25:40,557
Also, I sometimes work for
this guy called Damian.
298
00:25:41,518 --> 00:25:46,148
So besides being a member of The
Puch Club, you've got no interests?
299
00:25:46,358 --> 00:25:47,837
Oh yes.
300
00:25:50,518 --> 00:25:55,512
I'm designing a new app for
smartphones with one of my pals.
301
00:25:55,718 --> 00:25:59,108
This is a prototype
with Natasja Crone.
302
00:25:59,318 --> 00:26:03,789
You can do it with anyone.
We've uploaded everything she's said.
303
00:26:03,998 --> 00:26:07,957
Then you write here
what you want her to say.
304
00:26:08,158 --> 00:26:11,230
I want you to fuck me,
Gordon Tennis.
305
00:26:13,478 --> 00:26:16,550
- Gordon Tennis?
- She hasn't said Dennis yet.
306
00:26:16,758 --> 00:26:20,910
It'll take a while. We won't release
it until she's said every word.
307
00:26:21,118 --> 00:26:25,396
- It'll be huge.
- When did she say "fuck"?
308
00:26:25,598 --> 00:26:28,874
She said "fog" once
in the weather report.
309
00:26:29,078 --> 00:26:33,310
And until Natasja Crone
has said every word...
310
00:26:33,518 --> 00:26:36,828
- No plans?
- I don't believe in planning.
311
00:26:37,998 --> 00:26:41,115
How can you not believe in it?
It exists.
312
00:26:41,318 --> 00:26:44,833
- That's why we have calendars.
- I don't.
313
00:26:45,038 --> 00:26:48,235
- You can't know what will happen.
- Yes, I can.
314
00:26:48,438 --> 00:26:51,510
- You always know what'll happen?
- Yes.
315
00:26:53,638 --> 00:26:56,869
You didn't see that coming.
And it's not just onions.
316
00:26:57,078 --> 00:26:59,876
It could also be a turning truck.
317
00:27:05,918 --> 00:27:10,309
- Okay, what about that dessert?
- They've got a really good tiramisu.
318
00:27:10,518 --> 00:27:13,237
- Excuse me?
- Hey!
319
00:27:14,398 --> 00:27:15,831
Hi.
320
00:27:16,038 --> 00:27:19,917
- Oh, hi. You're from TV.
- You're pushing the young lady.
321
00:27:20,118 --> 00:27:23,155
- I'm sorry.
- Just stop doing it.
322
00:27:23,358 --> 00:27:26,634
- Or you'll beat me up?
- Of course not.
323
00:27:26,838 --> 00:27:29,398
There's four of you. I'm just me.
324
00:27:29,598 --> 00:27:32,829
Have a nice evening.
Sorry for the interruption.
325
00:27:33,038 --> 00:27:36,587
Do you think he'll get to fuck
the bird from TV?
326
00:27:44,118 --> 00:27:48,396
Stop it right now. Or I'll throw
this plate in your face.
327
00:27:48,598 --> 00:27:53,194
Maybe your friends will jump me. But
you'll be looking for your teeth -
328
00:27:53,398 --> 00:27:57,357
- so you can bring them to the
dentist. They'll never look the same.
329
00:27:57,558 --> 00:28:01,790
- We can just move the chair.
- That sounds like a good solution.
330
00:28:07,998 --> 00:28:12,310
Okay, shall we try that...
ice cream tart or whatever it was?
331
00:28:18,798 --> 00:28:21,596
You could also just go home.
332
00:28:21,798 --> 00:28:25,711
I've had my dinner, and you don't
seem to be enjoying yourself.
333
00:28:26,638 --> 00:28:29,710
- Is this a bet?
- No, it's not.
334
00:28:29,918 --> 00:28:32,068
Then why are we here?
335
00:28:32,278 --> 00:28:35,634
I got some food.
What did you get out of it?
336
00:28:35,838 --> 00:28:39,467
Is it an experiment?
A story you can tell your friends?
337
00:28:39,678 --> 00:28:42,909
No no, you're...
You're a welcome change.
338
00:28:43,118 --> 00:28:46,872
A welcome change?
Don't call me that.
339
00:28:54,918 --> 00:28:57,386
- Are you left-handed?
- Yes.
340
00:28:57,598 --> 00:29:00,317
- Is that wrong, too?
- No, no.
341
00:29:00,518 --> 00:29:04,227
I've heard that left-handed people
are very creative.
342
00:29:05,238 --> 00:29:07,194
I see.
343
00:29:09,238 --> 00:29:11,274
It's just...
344
00:29:13,158 --> 00:29:17,117
You know, when you've been
looking really forward to something -
345
00:29:17,318 --> 00:29:21,391
- and then when you finally get it,
it's not what you expected...
346
00:29:21,598 --> 00:29:25,796
Like when you got a present
as a child you really wished for.
347
00:29:25,998 --> 00:29:29,547
Maybe you didn't even
dare to open it.
348
00:29:29,758 --> 00:29:34,229
You're actually really
scared of what's inside.
349
00:29:34,438 --> 00:29:38,431
- Or...
- So what was in the present?
350
00:29:38,638 --> 00:29:41,277
Nothing. It was just a metaphor.
351
00:29:41,478 --> 00:29:46,188
Yes, but was it a teddy bear
or a dollhouse? A dog or?
352
00:29:46,398 --> 00:29:50,949
- You can't giftwrap a dog.
- Just make a box with holes in it.
353
00:29:51,158 --> 00:29:55,117
- It's easy peasy.
- I didn't mean...
354
00:29:55,318 --> 00:29:58,196
- Never mind.
- What was in the present?
355
00:29:58,398 --> 00:30:02,630
- That wasn't the point.
- Fuck, that's a lousy story!
356
00:30:03,238 --> 00:30:05,706
Let's order some dessert.
357
00:30:05,918 --> 00:30:08,432
- Was it a tent?
- Forget it.
358
00:30:08,638 --> 00:30:10,435
- A saw?
- No.
359
00:30:10,638 --> 00:30:13,516
- A blouse?
- May we order some dessert?
360
00:30:18,118 --> 00:30:21,428
- Here you are. Thank you.
- Thank you.
361
00:30:22,158 --> 00:30:25,309
I've never tried
ordering all the desserts.
362
00:30:25,518 --> 00:30:28,828
I've never seen anyone
stuff their face like that.
363
00:30:29,038 --> 00:30:31,677
- Except my ex-wife.
- Your what?
364
00:30:31,878 --> 00:30:35,154
My ex-wife could eat
a whole pizza folded over.
365
00:30:35,358 --> 00:30:38,111
A regular pizza, she just...
366
00:30:38,318 --> 00:30:41,390
- You've been married?
- Yes. For seven years.
367
00:30:42,718 --> 00:30:47,633
- Why aren't you together anymore?
- She wanted something different.
368
00:30:49,038 --> 00:30:51,393
We were very different.
369
00:30:57,278 --> 00:30:59,269
No, okay.
370
00:31:02,678 --> 00:31:04,794
She died.
371
00:31:06,118 --> 00:31:08,348
- What?
- Yes.
372
00:31:09,238 --> 00:31:11,672
But that's awful.
373
00:31:17,958 --> 00:31:20,233
I'm kidding. She left me.
374
00:31:20,998 --> 00:31:23,228
Look at the time!
375
00:31:28,718 --> 00:31:31,357
- Wanna see something crazy?
- Now?
376
00:31:31,558 --> 00:31:36,029
- No, wait a minute. My handbag!
- Thanks for a nice evening!
377
00:31:39,278 --> 00:31:42,509
- What is it I have to see?
- There it is. Look.
378
00:31:46,318 --> 00:31:49,390
Do you see that door?
It's a sex club.
379
00:31:53,438 --> 00:31:57,716
Me and Jesper come here
each Wednesday to see who enters.
380
00:32:01,478 --> 00:32:05,153
- Why Wednesday?
- Wednesday is Pee Night.
381
00:32:07,598 --> 00:32:09,748
Look there.
382
00:32:09,958 --> 00:32:13,268
Isn't it that woman
from The Liberal Democrats?
383
00:32:20,358 --> 00:32:21,871
Here.
384
00:32:33,078 --> 00:32:36,673
It was... I wouldn't say nice,
but it was an experience.
385
00:32:36,878 --> 00:32:41,394
Is it just me,
or have your tits grown larger?
386
00:32:41,598 --> 00:32:46,956
You don't need to answer. Come home
with me, then I'll find out myself.
387
00:32:47,158 --> 00:32:51,834
We're not having sex.
There's something I haven't told you.
388
00:32:52,038 --> 00:32:54,598
- You're a man.
- No.
389
00:32:54,798 --> 00:32:58,950
It's Erik. You've got to be kidding!
We were in school together!
390
00:32:59,158 --> 00:33:01,388
- Stop it.
- No! No! No!
391
00:33:01,598 --> 00:33:03,907
I'm pregnant.
392
00:33:07,238 --> 00:33:09,035
Okay.
393
00:33:11,998 --> 00:33:14,637
- I understand.
- What?
394
00:33:14,838 --> 00:33:18,831
Why you're acting posh. It's not
that you don't want to fuck me, -
395
00:33:19,038 --> 00:33:22,474
- but because you feel fat.
Don't worry about it.
396
00:33:22,678 --> 00:33:26,910
Your body odour's probably stronger.
It's perfectly normal.
397
00:33:27,118 --> 00:33:31,828
What happens is that the pH value
in the vagina drops so that...
398
00:33:36,158 --> 00:33:38,228
Are you leaving?
399
00:33:41,638 --> 00:33:43,037
Can I call you?
400
00:34:22,958 --> 00:34:25,153
Something's bothering you.
401
00:34:25,358 --> 00:34:28,794
You've got a
problem you're not telling me about.
402
00:34:28,998 --> 00:34:31,558
And I've figured out what it is.
403
00:34:32,558 --> 00:34:35,914
It's me. And your relationship
to men and women.
404
00:34:36,518 --> 00:34:40,397
And women. You're not ready
to talk about it yet.
405
00:34:40,598 --> 00:34:43,351
I wasn't either back then.
406
00:34:43,558 --> 00:34:46,356
So the big TV Award show's
coming up.
407
00:34:46,558 --> 00:34:50,233
I'm usually escorted by a young lady.
She can't make it.
408
00:34:50,438 --> 00:34:54,351
You'll get the honour. I'm telling
you now, so you can lose weight.
409
00:34:54,558 --> 00:34:57,436
- You're getting a bit pudgy.
- Anne!
410
00:34:57,638 --> 00:35:00,391
Does Anne Rasmussen work here?
411
00:35:01,798 --> 00:35:06,792
- What are you doing at my work?
- I just wanted to apologize.
412
00:35:08,998 --> 00:35:11,831
- I'm sorry.
- Apology accepted. Now go.
413
00:35:12,038 --> 00:35:15,075
I know
I acted like an asshole last night.
414
00:35:15,278 --> 00:35:17,314
Fine. Just go.
415
00:35:17,518 --> 00:35:21,306
We don't need to have sex.
I can beat off to your tits.
416
00:35:21,518 --> 00:35:24,874
When we've gotten to know each other.
417
00:35:25,078 --> 00:35:29,435
That's the most beautiful thing
anybody's ever told me.
418
00:35:31,078 --> 00:35:33,467
- Get out!
- Yes. Bye.
419
00:35:37,878 --> 00:35:41,234
I want to give you a present.
It's lighters -
420
00:35:41,438 --> 00:35:45,716
- I've st... found down the shop.
For the baby, you know?
421
00:35:47,118 --> 00:35:49,348
- Anne, are you pregnant?
- No!
422
00:35:49,558 --> 00:35:52,675
That's just what you call me,
right, baby?
423
00:35:52,878 --> 00:35:56,791
Yes. Right, I call her "baby".
Baby.
424
00:35:58,238 --> 00:36:00,706
And "bitch" when we're fucking.
425
00:36:00,918 --> 00:36:05,309
- And "teddy" when we're cuddling.
- So you've got a date already.
426
00:36:09,118 --> 00:36:12,428
- Then I'll just call Emma.
- Hi, baby!
427
00:36:12,638 --> 00:36:16,074
I'll see you in the flat
where we live together.
428
00:36:18,078 --> 00:36:19,557
Hello?
429
00:36:21,158 --> 00:36:25,071
Take it easy. Yes.
I'll come right away.
430
00:36:34,918 --> 00:36:38,035
Do you want a ride?
Something's the matter?
431
00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:42,675
Yes. My sister's husband had his
artery ripped open with a rake.
432
00:36:42,878 --> 00:36:46,757
They're going to the emergency room.
The children are alone.
433
00:36:46,958 --> 00:36:48,949
This way.
434
00:37:09,198 --> 00:37:14,226
Hello! There you are.
What an ordeal with your dad, huh?
435
00:37:14,438 --> 00:37:16,906
He bled on the floor.
436
00:37:18,318 --> 00:37:22,596
- I think dad's leg will fall off.
- The doctor can sew it on again.
437
00:37:24,078 --> 00:37:27,150
- It'll be all right.
- Look at this scar.
438
00:37:27,358 --> 00:37:30,430
That's from
when I crashed through a window.
439
00:37:30,638 --> 00:37:34,631
I accidentally piss...
peed through the letter slot -
440
00:37:34,838 --> 00:37:38,194
- at a biker chick's place.
You know what a biker is?
441
00:37:38,398 --> 00:37:40,628
- Yes.
- You do.
442
00:37:40,838 --> 00:37:44,274
Take a look at this.
Do you see this?
443
00:37:44,518 --> 00:37:49,672
- Do you know Kirsten from Istedgade?
- I know Winnie the Pooh.
444
00:37:49,878 --> 00:37:52,312
Anyway, she's got this...
445
00:37:53,358 --> 00:37:55,747
...place...
446
00:37:55,958 --> 00:37:58,267
...where you buy hookers.
447
00:37:58,478 --> 00:38:01,868
And then she's got a knife
this long.
448
00:38:02,078 --> 00:38:06,708
Lf, for instance, you forgot
your wallet or something like that.
449
00:38:09,278 --> 00:38:11,508
42 stitches.
And this...
450
00:38:14,118 --> 00:38:17,588
Do you see this wound?
Some bitch...
451
00:38:17,798 --> 00:38:20,517
No more stories about crazy women.
452
00:38:20,718 --> 00:38:25,997
It was a bitch. A dog. Why the hell
would a woman bite my calf?
453
00:38:26,198 --> 00:38:28,393
You're sick in the head.
454
00:38:28,598 --> 00:38:32,876
Thanks a lot for the ride. I'll take
it from here. You can go now.
455
00:38:33,078 --> 00:38:37,356
- No, he stays.
- I want him to stay!
456
00:38:40,678 --> 00:38:45,149
Okay. I also once
went for a swim -
457
00:38:45,358 --> 00:38:48,907
- and got attacked by a shark -
458
00:38:49,118 --> 00:38:52,428
- that had a giant...
459
00:38:54,238 --> 00:39:00,393
"The hare ran like the wind
across the field. Mr Hedgehog..."
460
00:39:00,598 --> 00:39:03,431
- Just a bit.
- Okay.
461
00:39:09,198 --> 00:39:11,075
More than enough.
462
00:39:12,758 --> 00:39:16,546
- "...Mrs Hedgehog said."
- I'll bloody well...
463
00:39:18,558 --> 00:39:20,947
And the teeth.
464
00:39:22,118 --> 00:39:26,873
Oh yeah! That's a brilliant throw.
You can only get that if you're...
465
00:39:27,078 --> 00:39:29,512
...Darth Vader or a ninja.
466
00:39:29,718 --> 00:39:31,834
Now it's your turn.
467
00:39:33,638 --> 00:39:36,869
- Who wants it?
- Six! You won!
468
00:39:37,078 --> 00:39:39,467
- Yeah!
- Great!
469
00:39:40,678 --> 00:39:42,873
- Hi.
- Hi, guys.
470
00:39:43,478 --> 00:39:45,628
Why do you hit me again?
471
00:39:45,838 --> 00:39:49,433
- How are you doing?
- This is how good I'm doing!
472
00:39:51,158 --> 00:39:53,752
- Hi, mum!
- Hi, kids. Hello.
473
00:39:53,958 --> 00:39:56,426
Hi. Calm down.
474
00:39:58,798 --> 00:40:03,030
- Who's that?
- It's Gordon Dennis. What?
475
00:40:05,238 --> 00:40:07,991
- You get a hug from me. Hi.
- Hi.
476
00:40:08,198 --> 00:40:10,837
Yes, we... We...
477
00:40:12,078 --> 00:40:14,797
- We're playing Aces.
- Great.
478
00:40:14,998 --> 00:40:19,913
- Have you been playing outside?
- Okay, I'd better get going...
479
00:40:21,278 --> 00:40:23,712
- Bye, boys.
- Bye bye, Kaj.
480
00:40:23,918 --> 00:40:25,590
Bye bye.
481
00:40:26,438 --> 00:40:29,475
- No, I can do it.
- Say bye to the man.
482
00:40:33,158 --> 00:40:35,592
Hey! Hey!!
483
00:40:37,678 --> 00:40:41,114
Thanks for your help.
It was really nice of you.
484
00:40:43,998 --> 00:40:47,547
So I'll just see you around?
You could come to that party.
485
00:40:47,758 --> 00:40:50,989
- Watch out!
- What are you saying?
486
00:40:51,878 --> 00:40:56,394
You can come with me to the party,
this TV Award show if you want to.
487
00:40:56,598 --> 00:40:58,395
Yeah, fine.
488
00:41:00,838 --> 00:41:02,590
Bye bye.
489
00:41:07,838 --> 00:41:09,874
Pussy! Pussy!
490
00:41:12,198 --> 00:41:15,156
This is something
to look forward to.
491
00:41:15,358 --> 00:41:19,317
He needs the last finish,
but, man, you're in for a treat.
492
00:41:19,518 --> 00:41:21,827
- Are you excited?
- Siv.
493
00:41:22,038 --> 00:41:23,994
- Come on.
- Yes.
494
00:41:28,878 --> 00:41:32,234
Without further ado...
Gordon Bond!
495
00:41:33,038 --> 00:41:35,632
Or... just kidding. Gordon?
496
00:41:38,478 --> 00:41:42,232
- Wow.
- Thanks. The colour is so beautiful.
497
00:41:42,438 --> 00:41:46,317
Okay, I knew I was hot,
but this is insane.
498
00:41:56,198 --> 00:41:59,474
Gordon? Are you coming?
499
00:41:59,678 --> 00:42:01,987
- Thanks.
- Bye. Thank you.
500
00:42:02,198 --> 00:42:04,996
Bye. Have a nice evening!
501
00:42:08,838 --> 00:42:10,430
Well...
502
00:42:11,718 --> 00:42:15,870
We'll enjoy a good dinner
and a spectacular show, -
503
00:42:16,078 --> 00:42:20,071
- watch pretty dresses and praise
Denmark's best TVshows.
504
00:42:20,798 --> 00:42:23,266
TV Award, my ass!
505
00:42:26,278 --> 00:42:30,556
- It's not Hannah Montana.
- Who knows where we're going?
506
00:42:40,438 --> 00:42:44,795
I hate karaoke.
Anything with people trying to sing.
507
00:42:44,998 --> 00:42:49,514
- It's pathetic. We're out of here.
- Relax, Sandra. Give it a chance.
508
00:42:49,718 --> 00:42:53,916
We need the yellow stuff, Georg.
We need 100.
509
00:42:55,918 --> 00:42:59,593
Fuck off! This is our table.
I talked with everyone.
510
00:42:59,798 --> 00:43:04,235
Everyone told me that of course
Anne should've won.
511
00:43:04,438 --> 00:43:08,067
- Gordon, this one's for you.
- Hey, hey, hey!
512
00:43:08,278 --> 00:43:12,112
This is it! Okay?
Are you ready?
513
00:43:12,998 --> 00:43:16,229
Come on! One, two,
one, two, three, four.
514
00:43:43,558 --> 00:43:45,674
I can't sing!
515
00:43:49,518 --> 00:43:51,952
That'll get him nowhere.
516
00:44:28,798 --> 00:44:30,868
You were great!
517
00:44:46,598 --> 00:44:50,432
You can't open your door
with a canapй. Give me your keys.
518
00:44:50,638 --> 00:44:53,198
Did you carry that in your pocket?
519
00:44:54,118 --> 00:44:56,029
Daddy's home!
520
00:44:57,278 --> 00:45:00,475
- Who are you talking to?
- Dolly.
521
00:45:00,678 --> 00:45:03,238
- Do you want coffee?
- Yes, please.
522
00:45:12,238 --> 00:45:15,275
- Do you want coffee?
- Yes, please.
523
00:45:24,918 --> 00:45:28,513
- What's that? Do you want coffee?
- Yes, please!
524
00:45:30,438 --> 00:45:33,111
- Milk and sugar?
- Yes, please.
525
00:45:41,238 --> 00:45:44,594
- Would you like a cup of coffee?
- Yes, please.
526
00:45:48,518 --> 00:45:50,554
So this is Dolly.
527
00:45:51,518 --> 00:45:55,636
- Do you often talk to Dolly?
- Yes, quite a lot.
528
00:45:56,438 --> 00:46:00,272
She's...
actually a really good listener.
529
00:46:00,478 --> 00:46:04,869
She's a really good buddy.
You may hold her if you like.
530
00:46:05,078 --> 00:46:10,232
But don't put her on her back. Then
she dies. They can't turn around.
531
00:46:10,438 --> 00:46:13,953
I thought
she could only lie on her back...
532
00:46:15,598 --> 00:46:18,158
Do you feel like a cup of...
533
00:46:20,278 --> 00:46:25,432
You almost sat on Dolly.
There, there. Daddy's here now.
534
00:46:25,638 --> 00:46:27,868
- So that's Dolly.
- Yes.
535
00:46:28,078 --> 00:46:31,991
- It's a turtle.
- She likes to cuddle in my jumpers.
536
00:46:32,198 --> 00:46:36,476
- So it's named after Dolly Parton?
- What?
537
00:46:38,718 --> 00:46:42,757
No. She's named after some old movie.
538
00:46:42,958 --> 00:46:46,712
My granddad was crazy about
Barbra Streisand.
539
00:46:46,918 --> 00:46:50,547
I got her for my birthday
when I turned seven.
540
00:46:51,678 --> 00:46:55,557
- When you turned seven?
- Yes, they can get bloody old.
541
00:47:06,118 --> 00:47:09,633
- You're very beautiful.
- What?
542
00:47:19,518 --> 00:47:22,669
- You can't stay here.
- Okay.
543
00:47:24,638 --> 00:47:28,836
But thanks for a great night and for
taking me home. And for the party!
544
00:47:29,038 --> 00:47:33,987
Did you know you could go up to the
bar and order anything you'd like?
545
00:47:34,198 --> 00:47:37,588
- For free.
- Yes. The bar was for free.
546
00:47:39,278 --> 00:47:41,394
Insane.
547
00:47:49,918 --> 00:47:52,227
So... what's the time?
548
00:47:52,438 --> 00:47:56,556
Now I'd like to go to my room
and masturbate if that's okay?
549
00:48:12,198 --> 00:48:15,554
- Thank you for a lovely evening.
- Nice to meet you.
550
00:48:42,718 --> 00:48:46,313
- A water bed? Seriously!
- Do you want coffee?
551
00:49:11,678 --> 00:49:14,954
I scored
Anne Rasmussen from TV!!
552
00:50:00,718 --> 00:50:02,834
- Hi.
- Hi.
553
00:50:04,358 --> 00:50:08,146
- Are you leaving? Now?
- Yes.
554
00:50:09,438 --> 00:50:12,953
I have to go to work
and tackle Sandra.
555
00:50:14,238 --> 00:50:16,752
Oh, yeah...
556
00:50:17,998 --> 00:50:21,308
You do remember
your drinking contest, right?
557
00:50:25,558 --> 00:50:30,029
So you're Anne's... boyfriend?
558
00:50:30,238 --> 00:50:34,436
And you're Anne's lesbian boss
who's secretly in love with her?
559
00:50:34,638 --> 00:50:35,991
Yes.
560
00:50:40,838 --> 00:50:43,193
See if you can win her
in a drinking contest.
561
00:51:04,038 --> 00:51:05,994
Do you give up?
562
00:51:06,198 --> 00:51:09,554
She's my girl.
She came with me.
563
00:51:09,758 --> 00:51:11,908
She's leaving with me.
564
00:51:14,838 --> 00:51:17,193
Sandra's the winner.
565
00:51:33,078 --> 00:51:34,955
Oh...
566
00:51:36,358 --> 00:51:40,112
Sure, I remember that.
Wouldn't you like some...
567
00:51:40,318 --> 00:51:43,674
- I can make you a glass of water.
- I'm fine.
568
00:51:46,678 --> 00:51:51,035
- But let's talk on the phone.
- Yes.
569
00:52:15,158 --> 00:52:17,626
I just need to get your leg...
570
00:52:17,838 --> 00:52:21,228
I just need your...
It's the wrong direction!
571
00:52:22,638 --> 00:52:24,947
Could you help me a little?
572
00:52:27,638 --> 00:52:30,198
Like that. There you go, honey.
573
00:52:38,238 --> 00:52:40,069
Hi.
574
00:52:41,398 --> 00:52:43,912
- What are you doing here?
- I...
575
00:52:44,118 --> 00:52:46,712
Yes, I heard some...
576
00:52:46,918 --> 00:52:51,389
- What? Could you hear anything?
- No, no.
577
00:52:55,838 --> 00:52:58,955
So you and Gordon Dennis, you're?
578
00:53:00,638 --> 00:53:02,754
Yes, we... or...
579
00:53:06,598 --> 00:53:08,316
Well...
580
00:53:08,518 --> 00:53:13,148
I also need to...
Berlin Marathon. I'm training.
581
00:53:15,398 --> 00:53:17,070
See you.
582
00:53:26,198 --> 00:53:28,666
I know it's your child.
583
00:53:28,878 --> 00:53:33,156
But here are a couple of suggestions.
If it's a boy...
584
00:53:34,958 --> 00:53:37,153
Bon Jovi.
585
00:53:37,358 --> 00:53:39,269
Or just Jovi.
586
00:53:40,798 --> 00:53:45,314
Or Bon!
And if it's a girl...
587
00:53:45,518 --> 00:53:48,669
Princess Amidala.
From "Star Wars".
588
00:53:49,758 --> 00:53:53,876
- Right.
- Hurry up, or they'll be snatched.
589
00:53:54,078 --> 00:53:56,797
They'll become trendy in no time.
590
00:53:59,598 --> 00:54:02,670
On average,
you've spent 3,600 kroner.
591
00:54:02,878 --> 00:54:06,029
Money you haven't got,
but spend anyway.
592
00:54:07,718 --> 00:54:09,231
Typical!
593
00:54:11,758 --> 00:54:14,670
Why is it called "First Blood"?
594
00:54:14,878 --> 00:54:19,508
It's because
they hit him first. He says...
595
00:54:26,398 --> 00:54:29,868
Isn't it all about
picking the right fights?
596
00:54:31,718 --> 00:54:35,552
He could've just
stopped at the county border.
597
00:54:35,758 --> 00:54:38,909
Just moved on.
Then it wouldn't have happened.
598
00:54:39,118 --> 00:54:42,155
- The county border?
- Yes.
599
00:54:44,718 --> 00:54:47,027
That's good.
600
00:54:49,678 --> 00:54:52,875
How can you live with
this messy economy?
601
00:54:53,078 --> 00:54:56,150
Who's this Bjarne
who owes you 1,500 kroner?
602
00:54:56,358 --> 00:55:00,476
Bjarne owes me money?
No, it's me who owe him money.
603
00:55:00,678 --> 00:55:03,795
This is a minus.
This spot.
604
00:55:04,798 --> 00:55:08,916
Then what about the riding school?
4,700 kroner.
605
00:55:13,118 --> 00:55:15,712
I'd rather not talk about it.
606
00:55:19,078 --> 00:55:22,150
- Is it prostitutes?
- No.
607
00:55:22,358 --> 00:55:26,271
- Then what is it?
- It's a riding school.
608
00:55:27,758 --> 00:55:32,229
I wanted to learn to ride at that
time. I'd rather not talk about it.
609
00:55:35,638 --> 00:55:39,392
There, there.
Easy now, little buddy.
610
00:55:39,598 --> 00:55:41,793
Did you just wake up?
611
00:55:41,998 --> 00:55:45,707
- Do you want to have children?
- Hell, yes!
612
00:55:45,918 --> 00:55:50,434
Hell, yes. They do all kinds
of crazy stuff all the time.
613
00:55:50,638 --> 00:55:54,233
They shit their pants while they eat.
It's...
614
00:55:54,438 --> 00:55:56,793
But not now, of course.
615
00:55:56,998 --> 00:56:01,276
And, of course, I have Dolly.
I promise you she's a lot of work.
616
00:56:07,318 --> 00:56:10,674
What does the father
of the baby say?
617
00:56:10,878 --> 00:56:14,029
- Say about what?
- About becoming a father.
618
00:56:15,758 --> 00:56:21,071
- He doesn't know. Yet.
- Don't you need to tell him?
619
00:56:24,238 --> 00:56:27,116
Mm. That's what I was thinking.
620
00:56:28,998 --> 00:56:31,717
Do you think he wants to know?
621
00:56:33,598 --> 00:56:36,988
I would like to know
if I was to be a father.
622
00:56:37,198 --> 00:56:41,350
But then again, then I'd be a father
and I'm really not sure -
623
00:56:41,558 --> 00:56:45,597
- if I'd like to know if I hadn't
planned on being a father.
624
00:56:50,238 --> 00:56:55,187
I'll go home and sleep tonight.
I've got so much work to do.
625
00:56:55,398 --> 00:56:59,277
And then I have
that scanning next Tuesday.
626
00:56:59,478 --> 00:57:03,790
- See you.
- I was thinking that if...
627
00:57:03,998 --> 00:57:08,150
If you aren't planning on
going there alone...
628
00:57:08,358 --> 00:57:11,748
- Then maybe I could ask you...
- What?
629
00:57:11,958 --> 00:57:15,314
- Should I come to that scanning?
- Do you want to?
630
00:57:15,518 --> 00:57:19,397
Yes. You can see the baby
and stuff, right?
631
00:57:21,798 --> 00:57:23,914
Cool.
632
00:57:25,758 --> 00:57:29,433
Look, Dolly. This is a calendar.
Then we can follow the baby.
633
00:57:29,638 --> 00:57:32,311
Anne will love this.
634
00:57:32,518 --> 00:57:38,229
And there are stickers. We bought
stars, suns, hearts and flags.
635
00:57:38,438 --> 00:57:42,067
Look. Then we can place this flag
when the baby is born.
636
00:57:42,278 --> 00:57:46,874
Or we can use the student's caps.
Why the hell did I buy those?
637
00:57:48,518 --> 00:57:50,713
That's stupid of me, huh?
638
00:57:53,958 --> 00:57:58,349
Dolly? Dolly?
Dolly! Dolly!
639
00:57:59,118 --> 00:58:01,791
Hi, Gordon. Pick up the phone.
640
00:58:01,998 --> 00:58:05,593
The scanning's in an hour.
So now I'll jump in a cab -
641
00:58:05,798 --> 00:58:09,347
- and come and get you.
I really hope you're home.
642
00:58:10,958 --> 00:58:14,155
Gordon, open the door!
We have that scanning!
643
00:58:14,358 --> 00:58:16,872
Ouch. Damn!
644
00:58:18,438 --> 00:58:21,350
- Ouch. Gordon!
- Anne. Hi.
645
00:58:22,718 --> 00:58:24,948
- Hi.
- Are you okay?
646
00:58:26,358 --> 00:58:30,397
Well...
No, it's not exactly a good day.
647
00:58:30,598 --> 00:58:34,557
Gordon was supposed to come for
my scanning, but he's not home.
648
00:58:34,758 --> 00:58:38,546
And now it's too late for
calling my mum or...
649
00:58:38,758 --> 00:58:41,875
- Shall I come?
- You have to go to work.
650
00:58:42,078 --> 00:58:45,150
My work can wait.
Shall I come?
651
00:58:45,358 --> 00:58:49,636
- I can't ask you to do that.
- You shouldn't do that on your own.
652
00:58:50,838 --> 00:58:52,908
I'm coming.
653
00:58:55,318 --> 00:58:59,470
Here's the placenta.
And the amniotic fluid.
654
00:59:00,558 --> 00:59:03,789
- And here you see the heart beating.
- Yes.
655
00:59:03,998 --> 00:59:08,276
- Would you like to know the sex?
- Do we? Do I?
656
00:59:08,478 --> 00:59:11,436
Yes. I'd like to know.
657
00:59:11,638 --> 00:59:15,108
My best bet is
that it's a girl.
658
00:59:15,318 --> 00:59:18,628
A little fine girl.
A little girl, yes.
659
00:59:18,838 --> 00:59:21,671
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
660
00:59:33,118 --> 00:59:34,836
Anne?
661
00:59:37,958 --> 00:59:40,995
Anne? Are you in there?
662
00:59:43,438 --> 00:59:47,716
You're not answering. Is it because
you're not home? Is it?
663
00:59:49,838 --> 00:59:53,831
Anne! Are you trapped
under something heavy?
664
00:59:54,038 --> 00:59:56,836
I'm coming! I'm coming!
665
01:00:08,678 --> 01:00:10,270
Anne?
666
01:00:21,238 --> 01:00:23,957
You gave me a real scare.
667
01:00:24,918 --> 01:00:28,752
I'm sorry I missed the scanning.
She nearly choked.
668
01:00:28,958 --> 01:00:32,792
- She ate stickers and some calendar.
- Who?
669
01:00:32,998 --> 01:00:38,231
Dolly. I ran through town with her.
She's at the vet now. She's okay.
670
01:00:39,518 --> 01:00:41,474
This is for you.
671
01:00:51,918 --> 01:00:54,990
"Take me back.
Yours forever. Mogens"?
672
01:01:01,398 --> 01:01:04,435
The cards got switched!
673
01:01:04,638 --> 01:01:09,507
This is bloody well not okay.
I'm going to call them.
674
01:01:11,958 --> 01:01:14,472
Okay, I found it next door.
675
01:01:17,038 --> 01:01:20,030
Why the hell do they
put sticks in them?
676
01:01:21,038 --> 01:01:25,316
I understand why you're mad.
It was a matter of life and death.
677
01:01:27,918 --> 01:01:32,548
- But she's doing fine.
- How do you know it's a girl?
678
01:01:32,758 --> 01:01:35,955
- Dolly?
- Will you shut up about that turtle!
679
01:01:36,918 --> 01:01:40,991
I just thought we had an agreement.
I really wanted you there!
680
01:01:47,478 --> 01:01:52,427
I'm sorry. I didn't know it was
so important it was me.
681
01:01:56,638 --> 01:01:59,914
- That's the baby?
- Yes.
682
01:02:10,478 --> 01:02:13,550
I can't even see
what's up and down.
683
01:02:13,758 --> 01:02:18,832
Which way is up?
It almost looks like a chicken.
684
01:02:20,118 --> 01:02:22,393
Or an alien.
685
01:02:53,278 --> 01:02:54,677
No.
686
01:02:55,478 --> 01:02:56,752
No.
687
01:02:58,438 --> 01:03:01,874
Right back at you, pal.
Fuck you!
688
01:03:04,158 --> 01:03:08,868
- Do you have five minutes?
- For you I've got 6,000 seconds.
689
01:03:10,398 --> 01:03:13,276
It's ten minutes
converted into seconds.
690
01:03:16,158 --> 01:03:18,308
Well... No.
691
01:03:20,038 --> 01:03:23,508
I'm pregnant. I'm sorry
I didn't tell you sooner.
692
01:03:23,718 --> 01:03:28,314
It won't affect my work.
Not until the maternity leave.
693
01:03:28,518 --> 01:03:30,827
- Pregnant?
- Yes.
694
01:03:31,038 --> 01:03:33,552
- With a man?
- Not like that.
695
01:03:33,758 --> 01:03:37,910
- I've chosen to use a donor.
- Okay.
696
01:03:40,118 --> 01:03:42,029
Okay, okay!
697
01:03:44,478 --> 01:03:46,628
I just have to...
698
01:03:51,518 --> 01:03:55,636
Now I'm gonna say something to you
that I've never said before.
699
01:03:57,478 --> 01:04:00,550
- I want to be the dad.
- Sandra!
700
01:04:01,998 --> 01:04:03,397
Oh!
701
01:04:04,678 --> 01:04:07,033
- Wow!
- No, please don't...
702
01:04:07,238 --> 01:04:12,756
I've got a wonderful little
community garden on Amager.
703
01:04:12,958 --> 01:04:18,237
Nobody knows about it. Hush-hush.
We could live there during summer.
704
01:04:18,438 --> 01:04:22,670
Running in the grass. We'll tear down
the shed. The other house will be -
705
01:04:22,878 --> 01:04:27,076
- a small creative workplace.
With a turning lathe.
706
01:04:28,838 --> 01:04:31,352
We'll make vases together.
707
01:04:31,998 --> 01:04:36,628
We could go for a walk on the beach
and find stones looking like humans.
708
01:04:36,838 --> 01:04:39,750
Humans looking like stone.
709
01:04:39,958 --> 01:04:42,267
- Sharon Stone.
- Sandra?
710
01:04:42,478 --> 01:04:46,676
- Yes, my dear.
- It sounds really great.
711
01:04:46,878 --> 01:04:51,156
- But I'm not a lesbian.
- Please stop that nonsense.
712
01:04:53,278 --> 01:04:56,714
Such a load of...
You're talking nonsense, Anne.
713
01:04:57,838 --> 01:05:02,150
I can't get inside you...
through to you with words.
714
01:05:02,358 --> 01:05:06,146
Then I have to say it
some other way.
715
01:05:15,478 --> 01:05:17,355
Ouch!!
716
01:05:24,878 --> 01:05:26,834
Bloody!!
717
01:05:30,678 --> 01:05:32,111
Ouch!!
718
01:05:41,878 --> 01:05:46,713
- It's Anne.
- I heard you got fired.
719
01:05:46,918 --> 01:05:50,433
- What do you want?
- It'sjust that I...
720
01:05:50,638 --> 01:05:54,153
Do you remember that guy Kean
I told you about?
721
01:05:54,358 --> 01:05:57,828
- The one who slept under the bridge?
- No, Siv!
722
01:05:58,038 --> 01:06:03,670
I don't feel so good about
his uncle living in my flat, too.
723
01:06:03,878 --> 01:06:07,314
So I thought:
"What would Anne do?"
724
01:06:07,518 --> 01:06:13,548
I would leave him. He's probably
a sweet guy and fun to be around.
725
01:06:13,758 --> 01:06:16,431
- And a really good lay.
- Yes.
726
01:06:16,638 --> 01:06:20,028
But when you really need him,
he doesn't turn up -
727
01:06:20,238 --> 01:06:24,868
- because he's immature and infantile
and lack direction in his life.
728
01:06:25,078 --> 01:06:28,229
- You know Kean?
- I'm home!
729
01:06:28,438 --> 01:06:33,637
Siv, I gotta go now.
Talk to you later. Bye bye.
730
01:06:37,598 --> 01:06:41,591
They were out of rocket salad,
so I ordered extra gorgonzola -
731
01:06:41,798 --> 01:06:45,871
- because you wanted something green.
I hope...
732
01:06:48,318 --> 01:06:51,549
Why the hell
did you shoot Dolly Parton?
733
01:06:51,758 --> 01:06:55,307
It wasn't on purpose.
You've got weapons lying around!
734
01:06:55,518 --> 01:06:59,193
How do you think
that'll ever work with a child?
735
01:06:59,398 --> 01:07:03,311
- What do you?
- A child! How is it gonna work?
736
01:07:03,518 --> 01:07:08,228
Cactuses and weapons just lying about
until you get stuck and drop dead!
737
01:07:13,998 --> 01:07:18,355
I've always had a plan. I've always
known what I wanted to do.
738
01:07:18,558 --> 01:07:22,597
And now I'm having a baby.
Then everything needs to be right.
739
01:07:25,638 --> 01:07:27,993
Just spit it out.
740
01:07:30,318 --> 01:07:32,991
We're a horrible match.
741
01:07:33,198 --> 01:07:36,270
You're all...
And I'm much more...
742
01:07:36,478 --> 01:07:40,357
So I think it'd be better
if I'm by myself.
743
01:07:42,078 --> 01:07:44,194
- Fine.
- Fine?
744
01:07:45,478 --> 01:07:47,628
If you say so.
745
01:07:49,838 --> 01:07:52,716
Well. Okay.
746
01:07:58,678 --> 01:08:00,157
Anne?
747
01:08:01,718 --> 01:08:03,754
Yes?
748
01:08:06,198 --> 01:08:10,316
Will you give me a note
for the pizza? I owe them.
749
01:08:17,558 --> 01:08:19,037
Thanks.
750
01:08:56,518 --> 01:08:59,271
Now the ends are of equal length!
751
01:08:59,478 --> 01:09:03,357
- Bottoms up to that.
- Where's Dennis?
752
01:09:03,558 --> 01:09:06,675
Yes, where is Gordon Dennis?
753
01:09:06,878 --> 01:09:11,588
He doesn't exist in real life.
Just like Santa Claus. Or...
754
01:09:11,798 --> 01:09:14,756
A glass of wine toddy with raisins?
755
01:09:14,958 --> 01:09:17,870
- It's my wiener.
- Go to granddaddy.
756
01:09:18,078 --> 01:09:20,638
Hang those on the tree, honey.
757
01:09:25,038 --> 01:09:28,951
- Merry Christmas! Beg for mercy.
- Laus! Put the chair down!
758
01:09:29,158 --> 01:09:33,037
- We have to watch the little one.
- Yummy.
759
01:09:35,838 --> 01:09:39,274
So! Boys!
Look, I've got one of these.
760
01:09:42,038 --> 01:09:45,428
Darling! You'll be
such a great single mum.
761
01:09:46,878 --> 01:09:50,951
Think of all the children in the
world who grew up without a father.
762
01:09:51,158 --> 01:09:54,787
- Jesus didn't have a father.
- He did.
763
01:09:54,998 --> 01:09:57,956
- God was his father.
- And he did just fine.
764
01:09:58,158 --> 01:10:01,912
- Jesus didn't do fine!
- Don't be so grumpy.
765
01:10:02,118 --> 01:10:05,428
- He died on the cross!
- Come join us.
766
01:10:21,238 --> 01:10:23,706
- Anne!
- Hi.
767
01:10:24,878 --> 01:10:26,596
Hi!
768
01:10:28,078 --> 01:10:31,195
- Long time no see.
- Yes.
769
01:10:31,398 --> 01:10:35,630
I haven't been at Gordon's
for a while. So...
770
01:10:38,678 --> 01:10:44,469
- Did you get some good presents?
- My family don't care for presents.
771
01:10:44,678 --> 01:10:48,876
We bring a small gift each
and then we throw a dice for them.
772
01:10:51,838 --> 01:10:55,433
It's all about
being together as a family.
773
01:10:58,558 --> 01:11:03,268
- Are you going to see a movie?
- No, I'm just out for a walk.
774
01:11:03,478 --> 01:11:07,312
I got tired of sitting at home.
I'm on maternity leave.
775
01:11:07,518 --> 01:11:10,316
Then you have to see this with me.
776
01:11:10,518 --> 01:11:13,476
- I'm...
- Come on.
777
01:11:15,878 --> 01:11:17,231
Come on!
778
01:11:21,038 --> 01:11:24,633
He's not recognized here,
but he's popular in Sweden.
779
01:11:27,118 --> 01:11:31,236
- Do you know if you want children?
- It's the biggest decision ever.
780
01:11:31,438 --> 01:11:34,828
I haven't found the one
I want to have children with.
781
01:11:35,038 --> 01:11:38,553
- Not yet. Unfortunately.
- Me, neither.
782
01:11:40,758 --> 01:11:43,113
- What about Gordon?
- Eh...
783
01:11:44,278 --> 01:11:47,429
No, it's...
Do you know each other well?
784
01:11:48,598 --> 01:11:52,591
No. We haven't
seen each other much.
785
01:11:52,798 --> 01:11:56,837
- Not until we switched flats.
- Switched flats?
786
01:11:58,998 --> 01:12:02,786
- Did you switch flats?
- Yes. It's a while ago.
787
01:12:02,998 --> 01:12:06,547
I wanted an office,
later on children's room.
788
01:12:06,758 --> 01:12:10,353
- Gordon wanted less daylight.
- Can't a man jerk off in peace?
789
01:12:12,398 --> 01:12:14,707
It doesn't taste okay?
790
01:12:17,078 --> 01:12:20,832
Yes, it tastes great.
It tastes absolutely perfect.
791
01:12:37,958 --> 01:12:41,394
You've got a piece of
the Berlin Wall!
792
01:12:56,038 --> 01:12:59,394
How do you know Nikolaj Koppel?
793
01:13:00,798 --> 01:13:05,872
Niko's my cousin. That was taken
on New Year's Eve. It was crazy!
794
01:13:06,078 --> 01:13:08,148
He's a blast.
795
01:13:08,358 --> 01:13:11,634
- Would you like something to drink?
- Yes, please.
796
01:13:25,958 --> 01:13:28,552
- The walls are thin.
- Yes.
797
01:13:29,678 --> 01:13:31,350
Thanks.
798
01:13:32,358 --> 01:13:36,431
The sauce needs a little extra
and then it'll be perfect.
799
01:13:36,638 --> 01:13:38,833
- Rune?
- Yes.
800
01:13:54,638 --> 01:13:56,993
Don't worry, I'll be gentle.
801
01:14:18,438 --> 01:14:23,751
- I can also stimulate your g-spot.
- That sounds lovely.
802
01:14:32,998 --> 01:14:34,954
- Hi, baby!
- Hi!
803
01:14:35,158 --> 01:14:37,592
Look what I found.
804
01:14:38,078 --> 01:14:40,194
- What do you think?
- Yuk.
805
01:14:40,398 --> 01:14:44,107
It's a gender neutral doll.
Then the child won't grow up -
806
01:14:44,318 --> 01:14:48,550
- with the social pressure of
having to be in a certain way.
807
01:14:49,198 --> 01:14:52,270
Don't you see? Hi.
808
01:15:00,438 --> 01:15:03,510
When are we to discuss
moving in together?
809
01:15:03,718 --> 01:15:08,872
If I have to be a good father figure
for the child, I have to be there.
810
01:15:13,398 --> 01:15:15,866
Yes. I have to be there.
811
01:15:17,238 --> 01:15:20,947
There's something we need to discuss.
About the baby.
812
01:15:23,638 --> 01:15:25,947
Yes. Right.
813
01:15:27,718 --> 01:15:31,267
Sure, it's strange fathering
another man's child.
814
01:15:31,478 --> 01:15:35,630
Especially with genes you think
are worth spreading.
815
01:15:38,678 --> 01:15:42,193
That's what you wanted
to talk about?
816
01:15:51,438 --> 01:15:53,156
Please don't.
817
01:15:53,358 --> 01:15:56,430
I'm also frustrated
that we can't make love.
818
01:15:56,638 --> 01:15:59,869
But if I hit the cervix
and set off the birth...
819
01:16:00,078 --> 01:16:02,194
You? No. Yes.
820
01:16:02,398 --> 01:16:04,866
Yes, of course.
821
01:16:05,078 --> 01:16:07,717
- We can't have that.
- No.
822
01:17:00,078 --> 01:17:02,148
Really good.
823
01:17:02,358 --> 01:17:06,146
Now I want you to try
another really good position.
824
01:17:06,358 --> 01:17:10,795
If the woman lies on the side,
and the man, the birth helper, -
825
01:17:10,998 --> 01:17:14,547
- sits behind the woman,
lifts up her leg -
826
01:17:14,758 --> 01:17:17,716
- and press through her foot.
827
01:17:17,918 --> 01:17:20,990
- That's it.
- This feels so wrong.
828
01:17:21,198 --> 01:17:25,874
- No, I think we got it right.
- Angle the hip. Angle the...
829
01:17:26,078 --> 01:17:29,787
- Anne?
- Now, gently stroke the woman.
830
01:17:29,998 --> 01:17:33,434
It releases endorphins.
Just receive. Enjoy it.
831
01:17:34,438 --> 01:17:37,908
- Try to loosen up.
- I don't wanna do this anymore.
832
01:17:38,118 --> 01:17:40,996
And Anne, now you just let go.
833
01:17:41,198 --> 01:17:44,156
Listen to
what your body is telling you.
834
01:17:44,358 --> 01:17:46,792
I don't love you!
835
01:17:55,038 --> 01:18:00,158
I'm sorry, Rune. You've done
everything right. You really have.
836
01:18:01,398 --> 01:18:04,674
It's just...
It just feels wrong.
837
01:18:04,878 --> 01:18:07,631
Don't touch me.
838
01:18:12,118 --> 01:18:16,873
Rune... I wasn't even
meant to be with a man.
839
01:18:17,958 --> 01:18:19,994
Press through.
840
01:18:20,198 --> 01:18:23,156
Did you tell Rune
that you're pregnant?
841
01:18:23,358 --> 01:18:27,510
- He kind of figured it out, Siv.
- I mean, with his baby.
842
01:18:27,718 --> 01:18:31,757
It's not Rune's baby. It's mine!
Rune was the donor. So, no!
843
01:18:31,958 --> 01:18:37,237
Now we're back on track. It was my
intention that I should be on my own.
844
01:18:37,438 --> 01:18:40,236
- I wasn't in love with Rune.
- No.
845
01:18:41,278 --> 01:18:45,556
But what about the guy you
were in love with? The cutie pie?
846
01:18:45,758 --> 01:18:49,148
- The one with the hair. The seagull.
- Gordon?
847
01:18:49,358 --> 01:18:53,192
Yes, Gordon. Did you tell Gordon
about the sperm?
848
01:18:53,398 --> 01:18:58,631
- That it was Rune's sperm?
- We need to change the subject.
849
01:18:58,838 --> 01:19:01,989
Not talk about sperm?
Is it too disgusting?
850
01:19:05,598 --> 01:19:07,953
TV HOST AT PEE SEX NIGHT
851
01:19:08,158 --> 01:19:10,672
Now, that's disgusting.
852
01:19:12,398 --> 01:19:15,834
Is this a hit
with our target audience?
853
01:19:17,518 --> 01:19:21,557
- Does it fit the show's profile?
- I hear what you're saying.
854
01:19:21,758 --> 01:19:25,956
If you're insinuating that we
desperately need a new host, -
855
01:19:26,918 --> 01:19:29,671
- you're right.
Want your old job back?
856
01:19:29,878 --> 01:19:33,393
- Full pay during maternity leave.
- Fine.
857
01:19:33,598 --> 01:19:35,236
Go now!
858
01:19:36,558 --> 01:19:39,516
Go and give birth,
beautiful creature.
859
01:19:39,718 --> 01:19:43,631
I'm so through with you.
You looked much nicer before!
860
01:20:16,318 --> 01:20:20,231
Changing pad... baby changing bag.
861
01:20:20,438 --> 01:20:24,067
- A baby towel and cotton diapers.
- This is all so cute!
862
01:20:24,278 --> 01:20:28,032
I need a baby bed.
Can I get any help around here?!
863
01:20:28,238 --> 01:20:31,469
- Who sleeps in such tiny beds?
- Children.
864
01:20:31,678 --> 01:20:35,591
So cute. And this one!
Just look at this.
865
01:20:36,958 --> 01:20:40,587
I've made up my mind.
I'm through with men now.
866
01:20:40,798 --> 01:20:43,471
- Completely. Just like you.
- Wow!
867
01:20:43,678 --> 01:20:47,148
Can we get some help from
Mr Baby-Sam himself?
868
01:20:47,358 --> 01:20:50,987
- How may I help you?
- Hi, my name's Siv.
869
01:20:51,198 --> 01:20:53,553
- Hi, Siv.
- Siv...
870
01:20:54,798 --> 01:20:57,949
Listen up.
We need a baby bed.
871
01:20:58,158 --> 01:21:02,071
- Easy to assemble.
- The dad's not much of a handyman?
872
01:21:02,278 --> 01:21:04,872
- She dumped him.
- The dad?
873
01:21:05,078 --> 01:21:08,673
You keep going on!
There is no dad! Where's your dad?
874
01:21:08,878 --> 01:21:12,473
- He's... He just died.
- No!
875
01:21:12,678 --> 01:21:15,556
Yes. Suddenly.
876
01:21:15,758 --> 01:21:18,795
- I'm so sorry.
- Sorry.
877
01:21:20,358 --> 01:21:24,715
I'm so, so sorry. I haven't been
heavily pregnant before.
878
01:21:25,518 --> 01:21:29,067
It's okay.
We're used to it in here.
879
01:21:30,478 --> 01:21:36,030
- Anne, did you pee in your pants?
- No! My water just broke!
880
01:21:36,238 --> 01:21:40,550
It's two weeks early! I haven't
bought anything on the list.
881
01:21:40,758 --> 01:21:44,592
- I'll take care of it, Anne.
- I miss everything from the list!
882
01:21:44,798 --> 01:21:48,074
- I'll get a cab.
- I'll come back.
883
01:21:48,798 --> 01:21:52,393
- You have to help me walk.
- I can't, goddammit!
884
01:21:56,598 --> 01:21:59,158
Birgit and Bent!
885
01:21:59,358 --> 01:22:02,111
A human being
came out of Anne!
886
01:22:03,958 --> 01:22:07,234
She's so fine.
Are all babies this beautiful?
887
01:22:07,438 --> 01:22:11,954
- They can't be, right?
- No. It was just by the book.
888
01:22:12,158 --> 01:22:16,231
- The Apgar score was 10. It's fine.
- It's perfect.
889
01:22:17,558 --> 01:22:18,752
Hi.
890
01:22:20,278 --> 01:22:23,270
- So cute!
- My little Anne.
891
01:22:24,758 --> 01:22:27,033
Congratulations, honey.
892
01:22:27,238 --> 01:22:30,867
- She's so beautiful.
- Beautiful!
893
01:22:31,078 --> 01:22:36,710
- She's your spitting image.
- Your spitting image!
894
01:22:42,558 --> 01:22:45,072
Then you enter.
895
01:22:46,238 --> 01:22:49,867
- Eh... Siv called.
- Please enter.
896
01:22:51,598 --> 01:22:53,236
Hello.
897
01:22:53,438 --> 01:22:56,316
This is Anne's parents,
Birgit and Bent.
898
01:22:56,518 --> 01:22:59,112
And this is Gordon
who is... Gordon.
899
01:22:59,318 --> 01:23:02,230
- Congratulations.
- Thanks.
900
01:23:02,438 --> 01:23:05,669
I brought some flowers.
And there's a card.
901
01:23:05,878 --> 01:23:09,712
Nice bunch of flowers.
What does Mogens write?
902
01:23:10,518 --> 01:23:15,433
Well... okay...
That was just so unacceptable.
903
01:23:15,638 --> 01:23:19,233
I've started
using another florist.
904
01:23:19,438 --> 01:23:23,431
So it will never happen again.
It was just so...
905
01:23:27,718 --> 01:23:28,992
Hi.
906
01:23:32,878 --> 01:23:36,632
- She takes after her mother.
- Yes. She does.
907
01:23:40,918 --> 01:23:44,433
- How are you?
- I'm fine. Just fine.
908
01:23:44,638 --> 01:23:48,392
- Tell her about the...
- What?
909
01:23:48,598 --> 01:23:51,829
- Tell her about your job.
- Oh, yes, I've got...
910
01:23:52,038 --> 01:23:58,591
Sandra offered him a job as a host.
She just loved him after that party.
911
01:23:58,798 --> 01:24:01,790
- "Shut the fuck up".
- Excuse me?
912
01:24:01,998 --> 01:24:07,277
It's the name of the show.
We're doing candid camera.
913
01:24:08,558 --> 01:24:12,551
- Wow! Congratulations.
- Thank you.
914
01:24:17,318 --> 01:24:19,832
Well, I'd better get...
915
01:24:23,438 --> 01:24:26,236
Take good care of
your mum for me.
916
01:24:28,878 --> 01:24:31,346
- Are you leaving without?
- Yes.
917
01:24:33,878 --> 01:24:36,438
- Bye bye.
- Bye.
918
01:24:41,118 --> 01:24:45,350
- Shall I put these in water?
- Yes. Thank you, Siv.
919
01:24:46,398 --> 01:24:51,552
- Who was?
- It's none of our business, Birgit.
920
01:24:52,438 --> 01:24:54,747
But who was it?
921
01:25:41,798 --> 01:25:44,471
We're so happy for you.
922
01:25:54,078 --> 01:26:00,347
Now that you've had the baby, there's
something we'd like to tell you.
923
01:26:01,438 --> 01:26:05,147
- Is anybody ill?
- No, it's nothing like that.
924
01:26:06,238 --> 01:26:10,197
It's just that
your dad and I are getting a divorce.
925
01:26:10,398 --> 01:26:12,036
Why?
926
01:26:12,238 --> 01:26:15,787
It all started
when I took up badminton.
927
01:26:15,998 --> 01:26:20,708
- Badminton doesn't lead to divorce.
- Anyway, I took up badminton.
928
01:26:21,918 --> 01:26:25,547
And your dad started going to
a chess club.
929
01:26:26,598 --> 01:26:29,351
- Did you meet somebody else?
- No!
930
01:26:29,558 --> 01:26:33,710
It suddenly dawned on us that
this was the first time in 40 years -
931
01:26:33,918 --> 01:26:38,753
- we did something separately.
And it was simply fantastic!
932
01:26:38,958 --> 01:26:42,030
Then sign up for more hobbies!
933
01:26:44,638 --> 01:26:47,835
- Dad!
- Yes, honey...
934
01:26:49,998 --> 01:26:53,388
- You've told her...
- That we're getting a divorce.
935
01:26:53,598 --> 01:26:57,716
- But you're the perfect match!
- That's the problem.
936
01:26:57,918 --> 01:27:01,433
- We've grown too alike.
- Too alike, yes.
937
01:27:02,958 --> 01:27:07,156
- Mum and I are still good friends.
- We're good friends.
938
01:27:07,358 --> 01:27:10,748
- Remember you need some...
- Differences.
939
01:27:10,958 --> 01:27:13,108
Otherwise you wither.
940
01:27:13,318 --> 01:27:16,469
- It's called the birds...
- And the bees.
941
01:27:16,718 --> 01:27:20,427
- Not the bees...
- And the bees. Right, honey?
942
01:27:30,598 --> 01:27:33,954
- I have to go.
- Now?
943
01:27:34,158 --> 01:27:37,548
- I need to talk to someone.
- Can't it wait?
944
01:27:37,758 --> 01:27:40,830
- No. He could get hit by an onion.
- An onion?
945
01:27:41,038 --> 01:27:43,233
No, a bus!
946
01:27:49,078 --> 01:27:50,670
Yes...
947
01:27:52,918 --> 01:27:55,557
GORDON CALL ME!
948
01:28:06,438 --> 01:28:08,793
- Hi.
- Hi.
949
01:28:09,798 --> 01:28:12,995
- Are you okay?
- Yes. Or...
950
01:28:13,838 --> 01:28:16,398
I've had one of these.
951
01:28:18,078 --> 01:28:20,194
It's really cute.
952
01:28:24,198 --> 01:28:26,951
- Are you coming, baby?
- Hi.
953
01:28:28,438 --> 01:28:30,952
Let's go out and find Gordon.
954
01:28:35,998 --> 01:28:40,708
Fucking no way! I don't want
to help you with your rollator.
955
01:28:40,918 --> 01:28:44,354
You got it down there,
you bloody well get it up again.
956
01:28:44,558 --> 01:28:49,234
If you can't control your rollator,
you shouldn't race it down here.
957
01:28:49,438 --> 01:28:54,114
- I'm asking you for help!
- No. I know your type.
958
01:28:54,318 --> 01:28:58,755
Now you've got no strength. But when
you're queuing at the baker's...
959
01:28:58,958 --> 01:29:02,746
"Can I get in front here?
I need some place."
960
01:29:02,958 --> 01:29:05,153
Pick up your crap yourself!
961
01:29:06,358 --> 01:29:10,954
- Thanks! Perfect!
- Fantastic. That was just fantastic.
962
01:29:16,918 --> 01:29:18,431
Anne?
963
01:29:24,238 --> 01:29:27,992
Hey! Anne!
964
01:30:01,918 --> 01:30:03,670
Good save, huh?
965
01:30:14,478 --> 01:30:18,994
I'm still freezing.
Great they got me this blanket.
966
01:30:19,918 --> 01:30:23,672
- You're too naked.
- Well, I was reeking of seagull.
967
01:30:26,678 --> 01:30:28,350
Yuk.
968
01:30:29,118 --> 01:30:32,906
- I've missed you.
- What?
969
01:30:33,118 --> 01:30:35,393
I've missed you.
970
01:30:36,638 --> 01:30:40,392
I thought you were much more...
And I was all...
971
01:30:40,598 --> 01:30:44,273
You are.
That's why I love you.
972
01:30:48,278 --> 01:30:50,667
I love you.
973
01:30:54,918 --> 01:30:57,671
- Then show me your tits.
- What?
974
01:30:57,878 --> 01:31:00,676
- Show me your tits.
- No!
975
01:31:00,878 --> 01:31:06,236
Why not? It's too easy
just saying "I love you".
976
01:31:06,438 --> 01:31:09,635
People do it all the time.
I can say it to them.
977
01:31:09,838 --> 01:31:12,432
Excuse me! I love you.
978
01:31:14,598 --> 01:31:17,954
- I mean it.
- Then show me your rack.
979
01:31:21,958 --> 01:31:24,631
- I'm wearing a maternity bra.
- And?
980
01:31:40,558 --> 01:31:43,026
I didn't get a proper look.
981
01:31:58,958 --> 01:32:00,311
Mum!
982
01:32:28,158 --> 01:32:30,069
- Hi!
- Hi, Siv.
983
01:32:31,438 --> 01:32:35,477
This is my boyfriend.
Baby-Sam, this is Anne.
984
01:32:35,678 --> 01:32:37,350
- Hi.
- Hi.
985
01:32:37,558 --> 01:32:39,913
My name's Thomas, but...
986
01:32:40,118 --> 01:32:43,872
- So how are you doing?
- I'm splendid.
987
01:32:44,078 --> 01:32:47,627
- How about you?
- Well, I'm not complaining.
988
01:32:47,838 --> 01:32:51,194
You scored Baby-Sam.
989
01:32:51,398 --> 01:32:56,108
He's so good-looking.
He's so good-looking!
990
01:32:57,038 --> 01:33:01,953
Yes. That'll be difficult. I'm moving
for my child's mother.
991
01:33:02,158 --> 01:33:06,231
- This is Rune, the sperm father.
- You know me.
992
01:33:06,438 --> 01:33:10,033
- I grow with the challenge.
- The other one's Gordon.
993
01:33:10,238 --> 01:33:13,674
He's not the biological father,
but he's the father.
994
01:33:13,878 --> 01:33:17,553
- Sperminator! Good to see you.
- Hi.
995
01:33:19,038 --> 01:33:21,268
Where shall I put it?
996
01:33:21,478 --> 01:33:24,436
- Over there.
- I'll give you a hand.
997
01:33:24,638 --> 01:33:28,597
Rune, my parents are coming by
and would like to meet you.
998
01:33:28,798 --> 01:33:33,713
You delivered the seeds and they find
that exciting. They sell plants.
999
01:33:33,918 --> 01:33:36,990
- It's heavy.
- Yes. Of course.
1000
01:33:41,998 --> 01:33:44,148
Do we put it there?
1001
01:33:47,078 --> 01:33:48,716
Yes.
1002
01:33:54,318 --> 01:33:56,593
It's just perfect.
1003
01:33:57,398 --> 01:34:00,629
Thomas, try it out.
1004
01:34:00,838 --> 01:34:04,751
You're sitting there, right?
Then what happens?
1005
01:34:04,958 --> 01:34:06,835
Fantastic.
1006
01:34:11,758 --> 01:34:15,114
Hi, Padme.
Hi, Padme. Are you ready, Eddie?
1007
01:34:20,158 --> 01:34:23,309
Yes, yes.
Want to see something cool?
1008
01:34:23,918 --> 01:34:27,547
Just look at this. What do you think?
1009
01:34:28,358 --> 01:34:31,987
No way! Wow!
1010
01:34:37,918 --> 01:34:40,068
There, there.
1011
01:34:43,918 --> 01:34:46,955
It wasn't that bad.
1012
01:34:47,958 --> 01:34:51,030
You want to say hi to Dolly?
No, a burp.
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