1
00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,684
REUBEN: I, Reuben, take you, Lisa...
2
00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:57,207
I, Reuben, take you, Lisa,
to be my lawfully wedded wife.
3
00:00:57,800 --> 00:01:00,007
I do.
4
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:06,283
- Lois, the room looks beautiful.
- Thanks.
5
00:01:06,360 --> 00:01:09,409
The candles have been replaced
by the mini-lamps you asked for.
6
00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:12,404
- So no fire hazard.
- Great. Did we sanitize these?
7
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:15,407
The best man is in the house!
8
00:01:15,480 --> 00:01:16,481
(EXCLAIMING)
9
00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:18,841
LOIS: Oh, my God!
REUBEN: Sandy, are you okay?
10
00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:21,082
Jorg?, ice. The best man went down.
11
00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:22,889
Dance floor's a Slip 'N Slide, dude.
12
00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:24,883
I thought I told them
not to wax this.
13
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:28,248
23% of the guests are over 70.
I don't want anyone breaking a hip.
14
00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:30,209
Don't worry,
I'm gonna take care of it.
15
00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:32,647
I analyze risk for a living.
It's my job to worry.
16
00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:35,883
Let me do the worrying,
because you got to get married.
17
00:01:36,240 --> 00:01:37,446
I'm good.
18
00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:40,649
You got my note that Harry Bard
at table 7's allergic to seafood?
19
00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:42,688
His chicken will go nowhere
near the fish.
20
00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:45,047
We're putting the finishing touches
on the cake.
21
00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:47,202
This looks great.
Lisa is gonna love it.
22
00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:48,486
Hit me, dude.
23
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,250
(EXCLAIMING) Aren't you that kid
from <i>Crocodile Tears?</i>
24
00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,288
That's right. I'm Sandy Lyle.
25
00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,249
I saw that movie in high school.
26
00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:04,209
That bagpipe scene
was the funniest shit.
27
00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:06,931
We had a good time on that picture.
Want an autograph?
28
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,126
No, thanks.
29
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:12,046
It's good to see you, man.
I thought you died 15 years ago.
30
00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,449
Ah! Nah.
31
00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,441
I'm very much alive.
I've been stage-acting.
32
00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:20,204
- Getting back to my roots.
- We should...
33
00:02:20,280 --> 00:02:22,362
They're making
an <i>E! True Hollywood Story</i> on me.
34
00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:23,487
That'll clear up questions.
35
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,483
They're really doing a show
about your life?
36
00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:27,961
I got a camera crew
following me the next few weeks.
37
00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:29,849
- It's gonna be huge.
- Cool!
38
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:32,327
Reuben! Two-minute warning.
Lisa's on her way down.
39
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:33,481
Thanks.
40
00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:35,403
- Look, Reuben.
- Yeah?
41
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,280
I'm asking you this
42
00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:39,408
because you're my oldest friend
in the world.
43
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:42,370
- And I'm your wingman.
- Okay. What?
44
00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:46,280
Are you sure you want to do this?
45
00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:50,522
Sandy, there's not a doubt
in my mind.
46
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:52,526
Okay?
47
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:55,888
I found the perfect woman.
We're totally in love.
48
00:02:57,160 --> 00:02:59,686
My life's working out
just like I planned.
49
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:01,649
Let's go get married.
50
00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:05,405
MALE GUEST: <i>Mazel tov!</i>
51
00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:07,762
Go on. Kiss each other.
52
00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:14,450
Big smile, everyone!
53
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,570
Come on, you love each other.
54
00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:18,244
Smile, Grandma.
55
00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:20,726
Having fun.
56
00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:22,331
(TRADITIONAL WEDDING MUSIC PLAYING)
57
00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,125
(EXCLAIMING)
58
00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:26,131
(LAUGHING)
59
00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:31,801
<i>Hello, everybody.
I'm Stan Indursky. Reuben's boss.</i>
60
00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:33,564
<i>Thank you. You're very kind.</i>
61
00:03:33,640 --> 00:03:36,803
<i>Now Reub's not the sort of fellow
to brag about his own success</i>
62
00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:38,809
<i>so I'm going to do it for him.</i>
63
00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:40,803
<i>The fact is this young man here,</i>
64
00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,810
<i>is the best
risk assessment expert</i>
65
00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:47,089
<i>in this whole</i> meshugaas
<i>we call the insurance business.</i>
66
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:50,004
<i>Irving, Vivian,
you've raised a wonderful son.</i>
67
00:03:50,120 --> 00:03:51,724
<i>Let's hear it for him.</i>
68
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,280
<i>Reuben, Lisa, let me just say...</i>
69
00:03:56,480 --> 00:04:00,326
<i>that I would insure your marriage
any day of the week.</i>
70
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,081
Mazel, <i>you two. Good things.</i>
71
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:08,926
<i>Oh, and, Lisa, don't tire him out
too bad on the honeymoon.</i>
72
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,480
<i>I need this kid fresh
when he gets back.</i>
73
00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:14,643
Mazel! <i>Good things.</i>
74
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,165
<i>You know, the truth is,</i>
75
00:04:16,280 --> 00:04:19,329
<i>I've been waiting for this day
my entire life.</i>
76
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:21,290
<i>About four-and-a-half years ago</i>
77
00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:24,091
<i>I met a real-estate agent
named Lisa Kramer...</i>
78
00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,006
<i>who showed me an apartment,
which I rented...</i>
79
00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:28,531
<i>just so she'd go out with me.</i>
80
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:32,127
<i>- I gave him a good price.
- Not good enough. She's a killer.</i>
81
00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:33,770
<i>No, seriously...</i>
82
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:37,043
<i>after about a month of dating,
I knew she was the one.</i>
83
00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,283
<i>And I couldn't be happier</i>
84
00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:43,887
<i>that on this day that I've been
dreaming about for so long...</i>
85
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:47,324
<i>the woman I'm standing next to
is you.</i>
86
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,448
(ROMANTIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC
PLAYING)
87
00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:56,689
(UPBEAT CALYPSO MUSIC PLAYING)
88
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,210
LISA: Oh, my goodness!
89
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:19,006
REUBEN: Look at this place!
LISA: I lost my shoe!
90
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:21,721
- So pretty!
- It's beautiful.
91
00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:23,081
- What?
- (BOTH SCREAMING)
92
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,207
(UPBEAT REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING)
93
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:35,247
- How's your bruise?
- It's okay.
94
00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:38,007
You know, it's a little sore.
95
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,684
REUBEN: They really should tell you...
96
00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:42,240
if they let Komodo dragons
run around the hotel.
97
00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:43,600
Really.
98
00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:47,091
Oh!
99
00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:49,851
- How about this one?
- Let's see.
100
00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:54,480
"Recently renovated colonial
in Montclair, three-bedroom..."
101
00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,524
Sweetie, we took a virtual tour
of this one on the Internet.
102
00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:59,921
It was perfect,
but just a little pricey.
103
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,889
Oh, right. That's right.
104
00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:04,769
It's probably off the market anyway.
105
00:06:04,840 --> 00:06:07,650
- Why do you say that?
- Because I bought it.
106
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:10,845
You what?
107
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,290
I bought it!
108
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:21,521
Reuben, I'm in shock.
You don't do things like that.
109
00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:24,001
- You love it, right?
- I do, but, Reuby...
110
00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:27,323
- We have a house!
- Oh, my God, we have a house! Honey!
111
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:29,605
(FRENCH ACCENT) Hi. Hello.
112
00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:30,887
(GASPS)
113
00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:32,564
How's it going?
114
00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:34,410
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
115
00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:36,244
It's going great. Thank you.
116
00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:38,322
I see you gang
are new to the island,
117
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,249
I want to come have a meet with you.
118
00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:43,642
I show you my boat. That is
my boat there on the sandbar.
119
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:46,491
It's very big.
120
00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:48,568
Yeah, it's pretty good size.
121
00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:51,564
So, tell me true,
are you guys for scuba?
122
00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:54,080
What does that mean?
123
00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:57,084
I'm the unofficial scuba king
of St. Barts.
124
00:06:57,160 --> 00:06:59,686
So if you're for scuba,
I take you out on the boat,
125
00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:03,247
I show you the coral reef
and we have like a scuba party.
126
00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:07,160
That sounds great, but we're not
certified, so we'll have to pass.
127
00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,766
That is no biggie.
I get you resort-certified...
128
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,205
couple of hours.
129
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:13,846
- I have always wanted to try it.
- Yeah?
130
00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:16,969
Good. My name is Claude.
What is you guys' name?
131
00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:20,124
My name is Reuben.
This is my wife, Lisa.
132
00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:22,283
CLAUDE: I am here all afternoon.
133
00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,204
All right, <i>au revoir,</i> Reuben, Lisa.
Solid.
134
00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:26,961
Solid.
135
00:07:27,840 --> 00:07:29,842
CLAUDE: Hi. Hello. How's it going?
136
00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,681
(UPBEAT REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING)
137
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,371
Reuben! Lisa!
138
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,289
- Hi.
- Hello.
139
00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:44,170
- Isn't this exciting?
- It is. It's fun.
140
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,650
You know what? I think
I'm gonna skip the scuba diving.
141
00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:52,406
Reuben, no. You called eight hotels.
They all said this guy was the best.
142
00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:55,569
I know, but you know how I am
about boats, and I feel queasy.
143
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,165
Your stomach's acting funny?
144
00:07:57,240 --> 00:08:00,722
It's okay now, but you know
how it gets. So why don't you go?
145
00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,081
We're on our honeymoon.
I won't go without you.
146
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:06,403
No, you've been wanting to try this.
I want you to go, okay?
147
00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:09,484
It will be fun.
I'll pick you up at 4:00, all right?
148
00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:11,722
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
149
00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:20,844
You're not for scuba, Reuben?
150
00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:23,685
No, Claude, I'm gonna go
run some errands in town.
151
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:26,684
But you guys go. Have fun.
Can I talk to you for a second?
152
00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:28,091
Of course.
153
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:34,446
Listen, this woman means more to me
than anything else in the world,
154
00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:35,846
so be careful.
155
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:39,527
Scuba can be very dangerous
if proper precautions aren't taken.
156
00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:41,602
Reuben, look to me in my eyeball.
157
00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:43,848
I promise you I take care of Lisa
158
00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:46,281
as if she were
my own flesh and blood.
159
00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:48,451
- Thank you.
- Okay?
160
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,084
- Solid.
- Okay, solid.
161
00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:55,524
CLAUDE: All right? Are you ready?
162
00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:57,523
Yeah. Will a little boat come over...
163
00:08:57,640 --> 00:08:58,766
Ally oop.
164
00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:00,330
(SHRIEKING)
165
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:05,650
<i>Au revoir,</i> Reuben.
166
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:08,804
- REUBEN: Bye-bye, honey! I love you!
- I love you!
167
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,608
(EASY-GOING REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING)
168
00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:28,971
Lisa!
169
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:31,165
Claude!
170
00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:33,286
Guys?
171
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,400
Hello!
172
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,166
Lisa?
173
00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:40,044
(CLATTERING)
174
00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:43,565
Knock-knock!
175
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,205
Oh, my God.
176
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,891
CLAUDE: I love you!
LISA: Ooh, la la!
177
00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:52,085
Oh, my God!
178
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:55,528
Holy shit, Reuben!
This is not what it looks like.
179
00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,688
You're staying on the island
with Claude?
180
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,768
I'm a little confused
right now, Reuben.
181
00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:02,366
I think I need a little time
to figure things out.
182
00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,165
What did you do to her?
Did you mess with her oxygen tanks?
183
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:06,526
I did nothing, Leuben.
184
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,608
My name's not Leuben! It is Reuben.
185
00:10:08,680 --> 00:10:12,480
Look, we had a scuba, we talk about
life, we drink some white wine.
186
00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:15,245
We cannot help it.
It is like love at first sight.
187
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:18,091
She make like the fire
in my trouser.
188
00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:21,046
LISA: What he's trying to say, Reuben...
189
00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:24,562
is that we didn't plan it.
It just... It happened.
190
00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:27,160
It's like the story of the hippo.
191
00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:29,564
I'm not familiar with that story.
192
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:31,762
The hippopotamus is not born going,
193
00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:34,406
"Cool bean, I am a hippo."
No way, Jos?.
194
00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:38,320
So he tried to paint a stripe
on himself to be like the zebra
195
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:39,606
but he fool no one.
196
00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:43,281
Then he tried to put the spot
on his skin to be like the leopard.
197
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,402
But everyone know he is a hippo.
198
00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:47,249
So, at certain point,
199
00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:50,204
he look himself in the mirror
and he just say,
200
00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:52,442
"Hey, I am a hippopotamus...
201
00:10:52,560 --> 00:10:54,722
"and there is nothing
I can do about it."
202
00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:58,726
And, as soon as he accepts this,
he live life happy.
203
00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:00,969
Happy as a hippo.
204
00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:03,930
You understand?
205
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:08,242
- I'm gonna kill you!
- Reuben, no!
206
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:12,088
No, Reuben. This is not the way.
207
00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:18,766
- You're gonna be fine, Reuben.
- No, I'm not gonna be fine.
208
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:22,241
I'm not gonna be fine at all.
209
00:11:22,560 --> 00:11:25,450
Don't come back to me
when you change your mind,
210
00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:27,528
because this ship has sailed.
211
00:11:29,440 --> 00:11:30,521
(HORN HONKING)
212
00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:38,001
REUBEN: Hey, Tina.
213
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:40,931
Hey, Mitch.
214
00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:42,965
Hey, Reub.
215
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,163
- Cheryl.
- Hey.
216
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,171
TINA: Indursky & Sons, how may I help you?
217
00:13:02,160 --> 00:13:03,207
What?
218
00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:11,049
How does everyone know about this?
219
00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:14,966
Your mother called Mr. Indursky
and told him what happened.
220
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:18,724
- I am so sorry, Reuben.
- Thanks, Gladys.
221
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,691
- Come here.
- Okay. Thank you.
222
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,488
- All right.
- I know.
223
00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:30,926
Hey, there he is!
The big man's back.
224
00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:34,841
Come on in here, I want to spitball
something with you.
225
00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:38,367
Can you give me a minute?
I'm just going to the men's room.
226
00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:41,010
I'll join you.
227
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:46,044
I heard about your honeymoon.
Just terrible.
228
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:50,722
I knew that girl was a slut
the second I met her.
229
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,806
Well, it's kind of complicated.
I mean, there's...
230
00:13:53,880 --> 00:13:55,166
Don't make excuses.
231
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:59,165
She's a dime-store hooker and always
will be. Just put it behind you.
232
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:03,645
Speaking of which, you ever hear
of a guy named Leland Van Lew?
233
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,765
REUBEN: Leland Van Lew...
Yeah, Australian guy, right?
234
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:10,921
- Made the cover of <i>Forbes</i> last year?
- STAN: Exactly.
235
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,081
(STAN FARTS)
236
00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,731
He started one of those high-tech,
modem-scrotum,
237
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:18,043
God-only-knows-what-they-do
companies anyway. Jesus Christ.
238
00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:19,849
They want to take
the company public
239
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:23,487
and to remain CEO of the company,
guess what he needs?
240
00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:25,767
- Life insurance.
- Bingo was his name.
241
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:29,731
- You want me to check him out?
- Yeah. There's just one catch.
242
00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:34,481
This Van Lew has a reputation
as a cowboy.
243
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,524
Apparently, he's one
of these extreme-sports nuts.
244
00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,049
So, it's a long shot
245
00:14:40,120 --> 00:14:42,600
but if you can
pull this thing together,
246
00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,762
there might be
a lot of dough in it for us,
247
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:47,764
an extra bonus for you,
help you with those house payments.
248
00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:51,049
All right. Let's make sure
he checks out first, and...
249
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:56,041
You see? This is why you're the only
one I can trust with these jobs.
250
00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,681
I was worried you'd been
through hell and back
251
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:00,569
with that whore wife of yours.
252
00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:02,642
You sure you don't need
some more time off?
253
00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:03,721
Mmm-hmm.
254
00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:06,161
- I'm good. I'm fine.
- Absolutely sure?
255
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:08,969
All right, good things.
256
00:15:27,840 --> 00:15:30,764
SECURITY GUARD: <i>Excuse me.</i>
<i>This is private property,</i>
257
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:33,930
REUBEN: Yeah, I know.
I just bought this house.
258
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,240
I move in next month.
259
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,483
Oh, sure. Mr. Phifer, right?
260
00:15:38,560 --> 00:15:41,370
Feffer. But you can
just call me Reuben.
261
00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:44,649
- Okay. Welcome to the neighborhood.
- Thanks.
262
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,688
SECURITY GUARD:
<i>Sorry about your wife, Reuben.</i>
263
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:56,884
REUBEN ON VIDEO: <i>First of all, I want</i>
<i>to thank everybody for coming out.</i>
264
00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:59,566
<i>This has been
an incredible day and night.</i>
265
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:03,845
<i>It's just so great to see all these
people, friends and family.</i>
266
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,001
(DOORBELL RINGS)
267
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:08,687
<i>To tell you the truth, I've waited
for this day my entire life.</i>
268
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:12,849
I'm so sorry, Reuben.
269
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:14,720
Thanks, Sandy.
270
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,531
- SANDY: I'm here for you, brother.
- Thank you.
271
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,082
DUSTIN: We're rolling.
VIC: Sound speed.
272
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:22,640
- What the hell is this?
- Remember Dustin and Vic?
273
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,564
They're doing the
<i>E! True Hollywood Story</i> on me.
274
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,723
Sorry about your wife.
275
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,846
VIC: Sandy, you want us over here?
SANDY: By the table.
276
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:32,410
VIC: Are you sure?
SANDY: Yeah.
277
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:37,491
- Is this better?
- Yeah, thanks.
278
00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:39,841
Look, forget it.
I'm not going to a party.
279
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:41,160
What do you think will happen?
280
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:44,164
Lisa'll waltz through that door,
saying she made a mistake?
281
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,163
No, of course not, I'm just...
282
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:48,846
I'm trying to make sense
out of what the hell she did.
283
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,287
<i>What can I say,
you're my best friend.</i>
284
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:52,767
<i>You're my partner...</i>
285
00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:54,370
Hold on. Let me see something.
286
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:57,011
REUBEN ON VIDEO: <i>...you're my wife!</i>
<i>Man, it feels good to say that!</i>
287
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:58,360
<i>And</i>
288
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,129
<i>you're my wife!
Man, it feels good to say that!</i>
289
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,610
Check out her expression.
She's terrified.
290
00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:18,284
- She's smiling.
- I'm a student of acting.
291
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,885
She's faking it.
The woman got spooked.
292
00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:25,566
She needed to explore,
which is exactly what you'll do.
293
00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:28,405
You've been gifted with freedom.
Don't turn your back on it.
294
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:31,051
I don't want freedom!
I want to be married!
295
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:32,565
I bought a goddamn house!
296
00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:35,610
I got to move out of this apartment
in, like, six weeks!
297
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:36,886
(LAUGHING NERVOUSLY)
298
00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:40,169
Look at her.
She's not thinking about having
299
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:42,083
a deep, committed relationship
300
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:44,925
with a complex individual
like yourself.
301
00:17:48,120 --> 00:17:49,167
- She's not?
- SANDY: No!
302
00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:53,080
She's daydreaming about having hot,
shallow sex with a French nudist!
303
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:56,926
"Oh, I'm hugging.
Oh, I love you so much." Liar!
304
00:17:57,840 --> 00:17:59,842
Whose party is this again?
305
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:03,009
It's an art opening
for this Dutch guy, Jost.
306
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:07,007
His art sucks, but he used
to sell me really good pot.
307
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:11,491
Oh, man, I'm so frigging horny.
308
00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:15,527
(RHYTHMIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
309
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,090
Just don't leave me alone.
310
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,680
I haven't been to a party by myself
in a long time.
311
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:26,367
Relax. I'm your wingman.
I'll be by your side the whole time.
312
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,041
So what do we do?
313
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:32,124
Do we get a drink
or take a lap around the...
314
00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:35,880
Sandy?
315
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,849
- More wine?
- Sure.
316
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:53,881
Thank you.
317
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:57,243
This party's so boring,
and there are no cute guys.
318
00:18:57,360 --> 00:19:00,011
I haven't noticed.
I'm appreciating the art.
319
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:02,289
I'm not looking for cute guys.
320
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:04,971
You swore off men
since dumping your last boyfriend?
321
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:07,651
He was not my boyfriend.
We went out for three days.
322
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:09,563
- It was two months!
- Really?
323
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,081
I hope he doesn't have
to buy that now.
324
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:33,241
Oh, my God! I think I know that guy.
325
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:35,605
(BELL RINGING)
326
00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:47,609
- You're Reuben Feffer, right?
- Yes?
327
00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:50,281
I'm Polly Prince.
328
00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:53,286
We went to junior high
or middle school
329
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,362
or whatever it's called, together.
330
00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:57,204
- Yeah! Polly Prince!
- Yes.
331
00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,045
It's coming back to me now.
You left before high school.
332
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:03,363
After seventh grade,
my mum and I moved to Michigan.
333
00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:06,887
- Now you live here in New York?
- Moved here a few months ago.
334
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:08,724
- So, you know.
- REUBEN: Wow.
335
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:11,967
(GIGGLING)
336
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:15,567
- Friend of yours?
- Yeah, that's Roxanne.
337
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:20,407
She does that with bread,
wine bottles, and... Anyway...
338
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,040
So what's your deal?
339
00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:26,125
You've got to be married
with kids and the whole thing.
340
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:30,171
No, I'm not. I'm single.
I haven't taken the plunge.
341
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:32,645
Can I talk to you for a sec?
342
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:36,645
Sandy, this is Polly Prince.
Remember? From middle school?
343
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:38,649
- How you doing?
- Wow.
344
00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:42,851
Okay, Sandy Lyle,
last time I saw you,
345
00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:45,844
you were playing bagpipes
in that movie.
346
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,849
<i>Croco Tears.</i> Yep, that's me.
347
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:50,687
Polly! Can I have a word with you?
348
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:52,762
- Sorry.
- Excuse us.
349
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:54,525
What happened to you?
350
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,762
I'm in a situation here.
We must leave now.
351
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,444
Can we stay a couple more minutes?
352
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,091
Dude, no. This is serious.
I just sharted.
353
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:03,086
I don't know what that means.
354
00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:05,766
I tried to fart, and a little
shit came out. I sharted.
355
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:07,365
Now let's go.
356
00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:12,204
You're the most disgusting person
I've ever met in my life.
357
00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:15,130
You have to walk around
and pour wine.
358
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:17,680
Polly? Focus for one second, okay?
359
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:23,326
So, hey, I got to go circulate.
360
00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:28,445
So, Sandy, you're good though?
You're still acting?
361
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:31,205
I am.
Yeah, it's going incredibly well.
362
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,962
I'm actually headlining a new
revival of <i>Jesus Christ Superstar.</i>
363
00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:36,565
POLLY: That's great!
364
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:39,211
- It was really good seeing you guys.
- You, too.
365
00:21:39,360 --> 00:21:41,328
- See you!
- All right. Bye, Polly.
366
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:42,731
SANDY: Be good.
367
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:43,966
POLLY: More wine?
368
00:21:44,480 --> 00:21:47,882
Polly Prince. It's funny, huh?
Seeing her.
369
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:50,968
POLLY: Are you okay?
GUEST: Great, thank you.
370
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,484
She looks good.
371
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:57,731
Let it rain!
372
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,244
REUBEN: I did a lot of thinking
last night...
373
00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:03,249
and there's something
I'm excited about.
374
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,324
SANDY: What's up? Nice. Let it rain!
375
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,162
I feel like I might be ready
to move on,
376
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,208
get my life back on track.
377
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:15,927
So, I am going to ask
Polly Prince on a date.
378
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:18,924
That's a mistake!
She's not right for you, dude.
379
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:20,886
Rain dance!
380
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:24,001
PLAYER 1: You guys want
to play some twos?
381
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,287
Actually, we're in
the middle of a conversation.
382
00:22:26,360 --> 00:22:28,044
Did you douche bags
bring your "A" game?
383
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:29,841
What was that?
384
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,684
I'm just messing
with you, Sasquatch.
385
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:33,364
Let's get it on.
386
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:37,961
Pick and roll! Take it rough!
Outlet!
387
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:39,930
Rain dance!
388
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:41,885
REUBEN: Sandy, come on.
389
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,366
PLAYER 1: I got him.
390
00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:47,805
White Chocolate!
391
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,291
Raindrops!
392
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:53,130
Old school!
393
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,802
T. Time-out.
394
00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,247
I'm burning. My lungs are burning.
395
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:01,484
Time-out.
396
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,406
So why do you think
Polly's so wrong for me?
397
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:05,641
(PANTING)
398
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:07,643
You don't even know this girl.
399
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:10,047
You haven't seen her
since seventh grade.
400
00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:11,406
How different could she be?
401
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:13,482
She was a senior delegate
at the Model UN,
402
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:15,483
she was in the chess club,
a Mathlete.
403
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:17,409
Her yearbook stats are impressive.
404
00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:19,642
Did you see the tattoo on her back?
405
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,006
Yeah. So what?
406
00:23:21,120 --> 00:23:24,647
Mathletes don't wear body art
like that. Enough said. Ball in!
407
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,407
I really feel like I ran
into Polly for a reason. Really.
408
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:30,403
I'm sorry if you don't agree.
409
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:33,290
But I believe
in a little thing called destiny.
410
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:38,291
PLAYER 1: You guys ready?
411
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:43,006
You know what? You think maybe
you could put your shirt back on?
412
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:45,170
PLAYER 1: You guys ready to play?
413
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:53,680
Good shot.
414
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,441
Could I have the ball for a second?
415
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:05,683
You know what? Could we switch?
416
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:09,811
I'd rather not. I just found out
how to cover this man right here.
417
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:11,211
PLAYER 1: Let's play.
418
00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:15,849
(SLOW-MOTION SLUSHY SOUND)
419
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:26,204
(SLOW-MOTION HOWLING)
420
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:33,525
(SLOW-MOTION GROANING)
421
00:24:35,400 --> 00:24:39,724
Can I get the number for a Polly
Prince, please? Prince with a "P."
422
00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:45,406
Okay, great.
Can I get the address as well?
423
00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:58,526
(PHONE RINGING)
424
00:24:58,640 --> 00:24:59,721
POLLY: <i>Hello.</i>
425
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:06,250
(PHONE RINGS)
426
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,051
REUBEN: Oh, shit!
427
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,728
- REUBEN ON MACHINE: <i>Hi. This is Reuben.</i>
- No!
428
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:15,007
<i>I'm unable to get to the phone
right now</i>
429
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,481
<i>but please leave a detailed message
after the beep.</i>
430
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,921
<i>If you're calling for Lisa...</i>
431
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:26,688
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
432
00:26:12,200 --> 00:26:14,202
Gladys, I got to call you back.
433
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,886
This is so funny.
I didn't know you lived down here.
434
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,924
Yeah, I do.
Do you live around here, too?
435
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,685
No, I don't. I don't live down here.
436
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:31,401
Hey. Did you call me last night?
437
00:26:33,360 --> 00:26:35,044
No. I don't think so.
438
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:36,400
Are you sure?
439
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:39,763
Because I got a hang-up
so I did that star-69 thingy.
440
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:43,003
And I swore
I got your answering machine.
441
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:46,088
Really? I heard that
from a few people,
442
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:48,806
so maybe the phone lines
got crossed or something.
443
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,884
- You doing some shopping?
- Oh, yeah.
444
00:26:52,360 --> 00:26:55,682
Gosh, I spent like $200
on this loofah.
445
00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:59,728
It's supposed to be specially made
in Sweden or something.
446
00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:00,887
Wow.
447
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:04,247
Would you like to go
to dinner sometime?
448
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:08,886
Oh, yeah. Okay.
You know, I'm not sure.
449
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:11,210
Okay. Really?
450
00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:13,926
Not that I wouldn't. I'd like to.
451
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,646
It would be great
to catch up on stuff and all that.
452
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,246
I just got to check my schedule.
453
00:27:19,360 --> 00:27:22,091
All right, how about
I give you my card?
454
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:23,685
Here you go.
455
00:27:24,560 --> 00:27:27,245
On the back I've written
my home and my cell number.
456
00:27:27,360 --> 00:27:29,249
- There's also a fax number.
- Right on.
457
00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:31,044
And a pager number, too.
458
00:27:31,120 --> 00:27:33,930
"Reuben Feffer,
Senior Risk Assessment Analysist."
459
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:35,963
- Right. Analyst.
- Analyst.
460
00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,290
POLLY: Right.
461
00:27:38,960 --> 00:27:40,450
All right.
462
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:43,925
See you.
463
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,364
POLLY: See you.
REUBEN: See you later.
464
00:27:57,480 --> 00:27:59,323
<i>Leland Van Lew's office.
This is Deborah.</i>
465
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:02,967
Reuben Feffer from Indursky & Sons
calling for Mr. Van Lew.
466
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:06,641
DEBORAH: <i>Right. The insurance man.</i>
<i>He's in the hospital.</i>
467
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:09,200
<i>He got bit swimming
with great whites.</i>
468
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,248
- Swimming with who?
- DEBORAH: <i>Great white sharks.</i>
469
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:13,129
<i>But don't worry.
It was only a flesh wound.</i>
470
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:14,281
(PHONE RINGING)
471
00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:18,807
DEBORAH: <i>He's due in Los Angeles</i>
<i>next week.</i>
472
00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:22,049
<i>- Should I set something up for then?</i>
- Could you hang on, please?
473
00:28:22,120 --> 00:28:23,610
DEBORAH: <i>No worries.</i>
474
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:27,169
- POLLY: <i>Hi, Reuben. It's Polly Prince.</i>
- Hey, Polly.
475
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:29,241
How's it going?
476
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:30,970
Good. I'm calling to say
477
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:34,129
I'm free tomorrow night
if you want to get together.
478
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,967
I'd love to get together.
That would be great.
479
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:39,481
Should I pick a restaurant, or...
480
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:41,011
No. You know what?
481
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:44,647
I should probably check my schedule,
see if I can even do it.
482
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:48,484
Okay. Did you say you were free?
483
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:52,446
No, I'm actually not sure.
I'll talk to you later. Bye!
484
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:53,965
Okay, hello?
485
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,288
DIRECTOR: One, two, three, and...
486
00:28:57,360 --> 00:28:59,408
CAST: (SINGING) <i>What's the buzz?</i>
<i>Tell me what's a-happening</i>
487
00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:04,480
<i>What's the buzz?
Tell me what's a-happening</i>
488
00:29:10,160 --> 00:29:12,811
<i>Why should you want to know?</i>
489
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,167
<i>Don't you mind about the future</i>
490
00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:19,810
<i>Don't you try to think ahead</i>
491
00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:23,486
<i>Save tomorrow for tomorrow</i>
492
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:27,369
<i>Think about today instead</i>
493
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,005
WONSUK: Sandy?
SANDY: What?
494
00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:32,840
I'm playing Jesus. That's my song.
495
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:37,211
I know it's your song, but I felt
something and decided to go with it.
496
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:38,771
But you're playing Judas.
497
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:42,566
Judas. Look, here's the deal.
I'm the star of the show, okay?
498
00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:47,049
So if I decide to bust out a solo,
give me the freedom to rock out.
499
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:48,890
From the top, Wonsuk.
500
00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:52,687
- So the play's going well?
- Yeah, I think it's gonna be fun.
501
00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:55,843
I just wish they wouldn't surround
me with a bunch of amateurs.
502
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:58,810
Isn't that
the point of community theatre?
503
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,041
Whatever.
504
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:04,051
REUBEN: So I'm going on a date with Polly.
SANDY: All right! Where you taking her?
505
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:08,245
Some restaurant in the East Village.
She left the address on my machine.
506
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:12,011
How could you let
Polly pick the restaurant?
507
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:14,326
I had no choice.
508
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,243
She called me seven times
to confirm
509
00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:18,169
and then cancel
and then confirm again.
510
00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:20,561
Why? What's wrong with letting her
pick the place?
511
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:23,365
You've got
irritable bowel syndrome, dude.
512
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:26,603
If she chose an ethnic restaurant,
513
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:29,923
you'll be running to the bathroom
every five seconds.
514
00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:31,969
Oh, my God. You're right.
515
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:34,245
Thank you.
516
00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:36,164
I doubt it will get this far
517
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:39,050
but if she turns out
to be easier than I thought...
518
00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:41,009
there's something you need to know.
519
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,447
- I'm not a virgin, Sandy.
- Not technically
520
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:45,847
but times have changed
since you were last single.
521
00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:47,285
Now listen...
522
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,890
when I'm making out with a girl
for the first time,
523
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,281
I like to give her
a little spanking.
524
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:55,084
- What?
- Nothing violent.
525
00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:58,050
Just tap her real light
on the tush and say,
526
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:01,283
"Hey, I'm your daddy."
527
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,490
Listen to me.
528
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:06,526
SANDY: What are you doing?
REUBEN: I'm blotting the grease.
529
00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:10,286
That's the best part. Don't be shy.
It's just a little tap.
530
00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:12,249
It's like saying,
"Boop, I'm your daddy."
531
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:13,401
I'm not gonna tap her.
532
00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:15,130
Brings them right back to childhood.
533
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:18,044
Trust me, they're putty
in your hands after that.
534
00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:20,971
I'm really excited about this.
535
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,281
I feel like
this could be one of those...
536
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,483
defining moments of my life,
or something, you know?
537
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:31,120
I actually think it's not gonna
work out, but I'm pulling for you.
538
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:34,845
Just pray to God
she doesn't go ethnic.
539
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:38,164
- The place didn't sound ethnic.
- What was the name?
540
00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:39,401
AI Hafez.
541
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,483
(ARABIAN INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
542
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:46,927
- So, when did you live in Morocco?
- In the late '90s.
543
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:50,049
I bounced around to a bunch
of places over the past few years.
544
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,003
- Like where?
- Oh, God, where?
545
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:56,722
Let's see, Austin, Istanbul,
Sri Lanka, Portland,
546
00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:59,241
Costa Rica, Buffalo,
a couple other places.
547
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:02,608
- Wow. Were you in the Peace Corps?
- No, I just like to move a lot.
548
00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:05,763
I get stir-crazy if I'm stuck
in one place too long, you know?
549
00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:07,251
Yeah, completely.
550
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:09,890
REUBEN: Remember,
you were the person who...
551
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:11,166
POLLY: Oh, my God!
552
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,681
I can't believe you remember that.
553
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:17,446
Of course! You were the greatest
delegate in Model UN history.
554
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:20,683
POLLY: I guess I did manage
to pass a few resolutions.
555
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:25,641
Are you okay? Because you're
sweating pretty profusely.
556
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:29,042
No, I'm fine. I always react
this way to spicy food.
557
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:30,761
But I love it.
558
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:33,042
I can't believe you're not married.
559
00:32:33,400 --> 00:32:34,845
Even when we were kids,
560
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:37,651
I saw you as the guy
who'd settle down at a young age.
561
00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:39,882
You were always kind of
like an old young guy.
562
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:41,200
Well, it just hasn't happened.
563
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:42,327
(GASTRIC RUMBLING)
564
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,971
But what about you?
You ever gotten close?
565
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:49,250
To the whole marriage thing?
Oh, God, no. No way, no. No.
566
00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:53,961
I'm not really big on the whole
long-term commitment thing.
567
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:57,281
Why, are you coming
out of a bad relationship?
568
00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:59,767
No. I'm coming
out of eight bad relationships.
569
00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:00,927
Eight?
570
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:04,402
- You sure I can't get you a towel?
- No, I'm good.
571
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:08,405
But if the right person came along,
things might be different, right?
572
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,769
Yeah. You're probably right.
573
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:14,202
(GASTRIC RUMBLING)
574
00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:15,486
Sorry.
575
00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:20,571
- You mind if I go to the men's room?
- Please, sure.
576
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:21,687
POLLY: Oh, gosh!
577
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:27,689
MAN: Occupied. I'm going to be here
all night, dude.
578
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:33,727
- All right, well, this is me.
- Great.
579
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:35,290
Why don't you come upstairs
580
00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:37,328
and I'll make you
some coffee or tea.
581
00:33:37,440 --> 00:33:38,566
REUBEN: Great.
582
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,086
I just got to find my keys here.
583
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:42,525
Oh, shoot.
584
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:45,965
(GASTRIC RUMBLING)
585
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:47,769
POLLY: Right there, I hear them.
586
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:52,524
Oh, yeah. Okay.
587
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,922
- Wow! This is great, so cozy.
- Thanks.
588
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:59,641
- Did you just move in?
- No, I've been here four months.
589
00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:01,930
Rat! Rat in the house!
590
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:06,050
Oh, no. This is Rodolfo.
He's a ferret.
591
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:08,881
I got him in Sicily
at a flea market years ago.
592
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,281
He's old.
He can't really see anymore.
593
00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:14,646
Cute. You mind
if I use your bathroom?
594
00:34:14,720 --> 00:34:15,767
POLLY: Sure.
595
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:18,889
That's not the bathroom.
My bathroom's right here.
596
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:22,322
Okay. Yeah, because I just...
597
00:34:23,320 --> 00:34:26,244
had a lot to drink, a lot of water.
I'll just be a second.
598
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:27,890
Okay, take your time.
599
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:34,569
(EXHALING)
600
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,210
I don't believe this.
601
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:37,361
(FARTING)
602
00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:44,004
Go away.
603
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:47,731
(SHOOING)
604
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:49,245
(FARTING)
605
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:01,364
(TURNS ON SHOWER)
606
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:05,611
(RUNNING WATER)
607
00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:12,726
Oh, no.
608
00:35:46,240 --> 00:35:48,049
(TOILET FLUSHES)
609
00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:52,970
God, I beg you, please,
if you make this water go down,
610
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:56,402
I'll sit at your feet
and serve you for all of eternity.
611
00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:00,802
I'll adopt a Somalian kid
or I'll work in Calcutta
612
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:04,322
or I'll just...
Please, make the water go down.
613
00:36:18,000 --> 00:36:19,525
Oh, my God!
614
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:23,923
POLLY: This was fun.
REUBEN: Yes.
615
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:27,806
If I'd known your grandmother
embroidered that towel,
616
00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,526
- I would've never...
- Really, that's okay.
617
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:35,131
- Okay, well, good night, Polly.
- Good night, Reuben.
618
00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:37,205
- Good night.
- Okay.
619
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:39,521
- REUBEN: All right, okay.
- All right, that's nice.
620
00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,691
SANDY: <i>Why would you make</i>
<i>number two in her apartment?</i>
621
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,451
She asked me to come upstairs.
What should I have done?
622
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:54,211
Tell her you're tired
and shag ass out of there.
623
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:55,327
Guys.
624
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:58,407
- What was that?
- REUBEN: <i>I called her to apologize.</i>
625
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:02,166
It doesn't matter, because I doubt
she'll ever want to see me again.
626
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:04,402
- I got to call you back.
- SANDY: <i>Cool.</i>
627
00:37:04,480 --> 00:37:05,641
REUBEN: Mr. Van Lew?
628
00:37:06,840 --> 00:37:09,411
- Feffer?
- Yes. Hi, Reuben Feffer.
629
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:11,448
I recognized you
from the <i>Forbes</i> cover.
630
00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:14,444
You're way early, sport.
Come on, then. Get in.
631
00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,807
- REUBEN: Is this the service elevator?
- Yeah.
632
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:20,369
I don't think we'll have a problem
with this insurance business.
633
00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:23,563
Sure, I take chances, but you can't
build a successful business
634
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:25,483
- without the occasional risk.
- Of course.
635
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:29,087
What I'm trying to determine are the
kinds of risks you actually take.
636
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:30,571
Only the calculated ones.
637
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:32,722
Trust me, I plan on being around
for ages.
638
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:36,322
I know we'd really love to give you
a policy if we can make it work.
639
00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:38,681
- We'll make it work, sport.
- Great.
640
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,807
- So, what are we doing on the roof?
- I'm doing a bit of a BASE jump.
641
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:46,009
Here, keep the walkie on channel 13,
all right?
642
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:47,889
I don't know
what you're talking about.
643
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:49,962
LELAND: A free-fall
from an inanimate object.
644
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:52,924
Always carry me chute in case
I find a good launching point.
645
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:54,326
- Oh, no.
- (PHONE RINGS)
646
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:56,641
Look, just don't do anything,
all right?
647
00:37:56,720 --> 00:38:00,884
- (ON PHONE) <i>Hey, Reuben, it's Polly Prince.</i>
- Polly, how's it going?
648
00:38:00,960 --> 00:38:04,248
- I'll shout when I'm through, okay?
- No, that's not all right.
649
00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:05,401
Can I call you back?
650
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:08,086
POLLY: <i>I just wanted to tell you</i>
<i>I got your message.</i>
651
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:11,243
<i>Let's just start over
and forget about the loofah thing.</i>
652
00:38:11,320 --> 00:38:12,685
Holy shit! No!
653
00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:14,326
(LELAND WHOOPING)
654
00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:15,481
Holy shit!
655
00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:17,164
POLLY: <i>I didn't even like that loofah.</i>
656
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:20,240
Relax. Leland's meeting
with the insurance guy right now.
657
00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:22,761
LELAND: Whoa! Yeah!
658
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:28,531
LELAND: Oh, crap!
659
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,246
- Oh, shit!
- POLLY: <i>I'll call you in the next few days.</i>
660
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:33,846
LELAND ON RADIO:
<i>Leland to Feffer. You there, mate?</i>
661
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:36,402
Yes, Feffer to Leland, hello?
662
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:38,005
LELAND ON RADIO:
<i>Come on down and give us a hand.</i>
663
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:40,082
<i>I think I fractured me coccyx.</i>
664
00:38:44,640 --> 00:38:46,404
(SOOTHING INDIAN MUSIC PLAYING)
665
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:49,929
POLLY: Look at that.
You got me a new loofah.
666
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:51,206
It's from Finland
667
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:54,204
and the salesman said
it has a very ergonomic design.
668
00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:58,251
Oh, Reuben, that's really...
Thank you, that's really sweet.
669
00:38:58,440 --> 00:38:59,885
Oh, my God!
670
00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:02,249
I don't believe this!
671
00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:04,124
What are you doing here?
672
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,850
We're having an early supper.
673
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:07,763
I wanted your father
to try new cuisines.
674
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:08,921
It's only 3:00.
675
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:10,889
It's a crime to beat
the dinner crowds?
676
00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:14,282
- Who is this young woman...
- REUBEN: This is Polly Prince.
677
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:17,603
Polly, these are my parents,
Irving and Vivian Feffer.
678
00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:20,445
- It's so good meeting you.
- How are you?
679
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:23,410
I can't believe you're
eating Indian. You hate spicy food.
680
00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:24,970
REUBEN: No, I don't.
681
00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:28,611
Well, I'm going to... Psst!
I'm going to ask...
682
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,207
I'm going to ask
this nice Native American man
683
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:32,406
to get us a bigger table.
684
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:34,881
They're Indian.
You can call them Indian. It's okay.
685
00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:39,761
Hi. Need big table, please.
Four people. Many thanks.
686
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:43,681
Okay.
687
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:46,841
VIVIAN: Now, how do you kids
know each other?
688
00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:50,845
We went to middle school together.
We were both in the Model UN.
689
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:53,446
You still work in government, honey?
690
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:56,205
No. I'm a waitress.
691
00:39:57,640 --> 00:39:59,529
She's also writing
a children's book.
692
00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:01,329
Oh, very nice.
693
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,401
You'll never guess
who I ran into yesterday.
694
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:06,130
- Who's that?
- VIVIAN: Lisa's mother.
695
00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:07,281
REUBEN: Mmm-hmm. That's good.
696
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:09,681
Dad, did you try this...
What's this called?
697
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:11,768
- Saag.
- Saag. Did you try this?
698
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:15,526
Apparently, Lisa's doing wonderfully
down there in St. Barts...
699
00:40:15,640 --> 00:40:17,130
selling villas, happy.
700
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:18,645
That's good for her.
701
00:40:18,720 --> 00:40:21,291
- Now, who's Lisa?
- Not important.
702
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:23,010
Lisa is Reuben's wife.
703
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:26,924
She left him for another man
on their honeymoon.
704
00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:30,688
Are we ready for the check?
I think we'll take the check.
705
00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:31,961
What?
706
00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:37,010
- Well, your dad seems really nice.
- Yes, a man of few words.
707
00:40:37,880 --> 00:40:41,851
I just want you to know, I was going
to tell you about Lisa. I just...
708
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:44,088
I was embarrassed and I...
709
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:46,687
I guess because I hadn't seen you
for so long...
710
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:48,808
It's so okay. I understand.
711
00:40:48,880 --> 00:40:52,009
I was an idiot. I should've told you
the truth from the start.
712
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:54,003
Really, I'm not upset.
713
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:58,370
- But when did this happen?
- Two weeks ago.
714
00:40:58,960 --> 00:41:01,201
Two weeks ago?
715
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:05,011
Oh, my God! Are you okay?
716
00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:09,408
Well, it was a pretty big shock.
717
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:14,930
I walked in on her, on Lisa with...
718
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,922
a scuba instructor on the first day
of our honeymoon.
719
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:23,564
They were still wearing
their flippers. Anyway...
720
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:30,651
POLLY: I mean...
721
00:41:36,160 --> 00:41:39,801
(ON ANSWERING MACHINE)
<i>Hey, Reuben, it's Polly Prince.</i>
722
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:44,163
<i>I don't know
if you have any plans tonight</i>
723
00:41:44,240 --> 00:41:48,689
<i>but if not, you should swing by
37 Gansevort Street around 9:00...</i>
724
00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:51,886
<i>if you can make it.
You know, it's no big deal.</i>
725
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:55,328
<i>But it could be fun,
so, you know, think about it.</i>
726
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:58,361
<i>Okay, so...</i>
727
00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:00,285
<i>I'll see you later.</i>
728
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:02,044
<i>Or not. I mean, either way.</i>
729
00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:05,602
<i>Oh, if you do come,
you should wear comfortable shoes.</i>
730
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:08,490
<i>That is, if you come,
which you totally don't have to.</i>
731
00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:10,767
<i>I mean, I might not even be there.</i>
732
00:42:17,720 --> 00:42:19,484
I am so glad that you came.
733
00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:21,801
I wore comfortable shoes
like you said.
734
00:42:21,880 --> 00:42:23,564
So, what are we doing?
735
00:42:25,480 --> 00:42:26,845
Oh, crap.
736
00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:31,404
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYING)
737
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:35,249
POLLY: This place is a total secret.
738
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:38,005
It's the best underground
salsa club in New York.
739
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:42,005
- I'm not really a big dancer.
- It's easier than it looks.
740
00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:46,730
- There you go. Feel it in your legs.
- REUBEN: All right.
741
00:42:47,240 --> 00:42:48,321
Sorry.
742
00:42:48,400 --> 00:42:51,609
It's okay. Just step on my feet
a little less than that.
743
00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:01,850
FEMALE SINGER: <i>Work it!</i>
744
00:43:05,880 --> 00:43:09,362
- Looking good, Pollyanna.
- Hey, Javi.
745
00:43:10,600 --> 00:43:14,002
Oh, you should stop that.
This is my friend Reuben.
746
00:43:14,880 --> 00:43:16,006
This is Javi.
747
00:43:16,080 --> 00:43:18,731
Mind if I dance
with the beautiful lady?
748
00:43:19,520 --> 00:43:22,205
- I guess not.
- Thanks, man.
749
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:42,808
(MUSIC SLOWS DOWN)
750
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:03,401
- I think I might take off.
- Really?
751
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:05,365
Are you having a bad time?
752
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:08,284
No, I'm just not into
this whole dirty dancing thing.
753
00:44:08,400 --> 00:44:10,209
What do you mean, "dirty dancing"?
754
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:13,568
I saw that movie. I know that's what
you and that Spaniard were doing.
755
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:17,087
Whoa! Wait a minute.
First of all, he's Cuban.
756
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:20,450
And that wasn't dirty dancing,
that was just salsa.
757
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:23,884
Okay, I'm just really, truthfully
not the kind of guy
758
00:44:23,960 --> 00:44:26,122
that's ever gonna be
into these kind of clubs...
759
00:44:26,240 --> 00:44:28,083
Okay, Reuben, then...
760
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,011
tell me, what kind of guy are you?
761
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:33,487
What kind of guy am I?
What do you mean?
762
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:37,047
Up until now, you haven't exactly
been the portrait of honesty.
763
00:44:37,120 --> 00:44:40,602
So just come clean, okay?
Just tell me who you are.
764
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:43,568
- I hate spicy food.
- I knew it!
765
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:46,530
I don't like it at all.
I have a mild case of IBS and...
766
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:48,364
- What's that?
- Irritable bowel syndrome.
767
00:44:48,440 --> 00:44:50,681
- What?
- Irritable bowel syndrome.
768
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:54,048
Oh, God. That's terrible. What else?
769
00:44:54,360 --> 00:44:56,522
The thing is,
I assess risk for a living.
770
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:59,888
So I know I have a 0.01 <i>3%</i> chance
of being hit by a car
771
00:44:59,960 --> 00:45:02,486
on my way home,
or a 1 in 46,000 chance
772
00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:04,682
- of falling through a subway grate.
- Really?
773
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:08,043
I manage that risk by
avoiding danger, having a plan
774
00:45:08,120 --> 00:45:09,485
and knowing my next move.
775
00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:12,484
And I guess
you don't live your life that way...
776
00:45:12,560 --> 00:45:14,130
No, I do it a little differently.
777
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:17,124
Which is great, but I'm not
gonna ever be a dirty dancer
778
00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:18,850
and I don't eat food
with my hands
779
00:45:18,960 --> 00:45:20,121
and I really like you
780
00:45:20,200 --> 00:45:22,965
but I just don't think
this is gonna work out.
781
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,083
POLLY: I just have to go pee.
REUBEN: Okay.
782
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:39,848
(SENSUAL SOUL MUSIC)
783
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:47,968
(RUNNING WATER)
784
00:45:48,720 --> 00:45:50,563
POLLY: Just kidding!
785
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:53,606
Oh! Funny.
786
00:46:23,080 --> 00:46:24,206
Hi.
787
00:46:43,040 --> 00:46:44,041
POLLY: Ow!
788
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:47,123
Did you just spank me?
789
00:46:48,120 --> 00:46:50,043
No! I don't...
790
00:46:51,240 --> 00:46:53,925
Are you sure? Because it felt
like you just swatted me.
791
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:56,003
No, I have a little crick
in my wrist.
792
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:58,162
You felt that, I was just...
Do you hear that?
793
00:46:58,240 --> 00:46:59,844
- Really?
- Yeah, you hear that?
794
00:46:59,960 --> 00:47:01,450
Well, I got it out.
795
00:47:04,120 --> 00:47:05,929
(SENSUAL LATINO MUSIC PLAYING)
796
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:14,162
REUBEN: <i>Oh, wow. This is incredible.</i>
797
00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:16,251
<i>Oh, man.</i>
798
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:19,801
<i>Oh, God. Oh, yeah.</i>
799
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:23,203
<i>Oh, no! No, you can't be done yet.</i>
800
00:47:23,360 --> 00:47:24,885
<i>Come on, Reuben, focus.</i>
801
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:27,361
<i>You have to last
at least five minutes here.</i>
802
00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:30,728
<i>Four minutes, twenty-seven,
twenty-six, twenty-five.</i>
803
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:35,729
<i>Two minutes, twenty. nineteen,
eighteen, seventeen.</i>
804
00:47:36,200 --> 00:47:40,285
<i>Come on, you can do it.
55, 54, 53, 52, 51, oh, God!</i>
805
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:41,606
Fifty!
806
00:47:45,880 --> 00:47:47,962
(LAUGHING) Fifty? Yeah!
807
00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:50,127
Whoo!
808
00:47:51,040 --> 00:47:52,371
SANDY: Let it rain!
809
00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:56,047
I think I might end up marrying
this woman.
810
00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:58,168
SANDY: Really? After one night?
811
00:47:58,360 --> 00:48:00,124
Did you spank her?
812
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:02,887
Yeah, I tried,
but I don't think she liked it.
813
00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:05,167
Yeah, some women find it offensive.
814
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:07,406
Iceman!
815
00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:11,926
POLLY: I did not sleep with him
out of charity.
816
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:14,122
You weren't interested
till you found out
817
00:48:14,200 --> 00:48:15,964
his wife boned a guy
on their honeymoon.
818
00:48:16,080 --> 00:48:20,210
That's not it.
He is a kind, decent, solid guy.
819
00:48:20,280 --> 00:48:22,487
I've never been
with anybody like that.
820
00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:25,166
Still sounds like a charity boning.
821
00:48:25,640 --> 00:48:28,484
Do you have to use
the word "bone" every time?
822
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:31,407
I use it when it's appropriate.
823
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:36,007
Ever heard of a guy shouting out
"fifty" when he orgasmed?
824
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:42,443
Okay, so throw pillows
go in this cabinet here.
825
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:47,447
You don't sleep on these?
826
00:48:47,800 --> 00:48:50,371
No, they're decorative.
827
00:48:51,280 --> 00:48:53,442
- For who?
- What do you mean?
828
00:48:53,560 --> 00:48:56,803
You're the only one who sees them,
but you don't sleep on them.
829
00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:59,087
You take them off the bed,
put them in a box,
830
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:02,528
take them out, put them...
I just don't understand the point.
831
00:49:02,600 --> 00:49:05,410
I don't know.
Lisa thought they looked nice.
832
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:06,686
Oh, I see.
833
00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:22,361
I don't see what the big deal is.
They make the bed look nice.
834
00:49:27,040 --> 00:49:28,769
What are you doing?
That's goose down.
835
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:30,644
I'm liberating you.
836
00:49:31,320 --> 00:49:33,448
- Try it.
- No, I'm not going to...
837
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:36,245
Just one stab.
Come on, see how you feel.
838
00:49:36,800 --> 00:49:38,689
- This is ridiculous.
- It's not ridiculous.
839
00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:41,240
It's not like driving a knife
into a pillow
840
00:49:41,320 --> 00:49:43,561
is suddenly going
to make me feel...
841
00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:46,162
Wow. That feels really good.
842
00:49:46,720 --> 00:49:47,960
POLLY: Right?
843
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:51,367
- What did I tell you?
- You're right.
844
00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:52,646
Come on, bigger one!
845
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,411
- REUBEN: What's the point of these things?
- No point.
846
00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:56,766
POLLY: Stupid.
847
00:49:58,560 --> 00:50:01,609
- Am I running a bed-and-breakfast?
- Not anymore.
848
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:03,045
Know how many minutes I spend
849
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:04,770
- getting them on and off?
- How many?
850
00:50:04,840 --> 00:50:07,081
Four in the morning, four at night.
Eight minutes.
851
00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:09,367
Fiffy-six minutes a week,
two days a year,
852
00:50:09,440 --> 00:50:12,603
spent putting pillows
on and off a stupid bed!
853
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:15,000
Whoa!
854
00:50:16,440 --> 00:50:18,169
Wait, you hit mattress.
855
00:50:18,240 --> 00:50:19,241
Oh!
856
00:50:20,480 --> 00:50:23,529
You know what? I really got to go.
I'm late. Shoot!
857
00:50:23,600 --> 00:50:25,170
REUBEN: <i>What's wrong?</i>
<i>Lose your keys again?</i>
858
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:28,170
No, they're just not
where I left them before.
859
00:50:28,280 --> 00:50:30,328
<i>Why don't you use that key-finder
I bought you?</i>
860
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:32,442
- I don't...
<i>- I think it could help.</i>
861
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:34,682
...need the stupid key-finder!
862
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:37,804
<i>All right. Anyway, I was thinking
I'd come meet you.</i>
863
00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:40,565
Really? I thought you hated
dirty dancing clubs.
864
00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:41,966
(BEEPING)
865
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:44,088
<i>It's just salsa. It will be fun.
I'll watch.</i>
866
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:45,810
<i>- What's that noise?</i>
- Nothing.
867
00:50:45,880 --> 00:50:49,248
<i>- It's the key-finder, isn't it?</i>
- It's so not the key-finder.
868
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:52,164
<i>- Yes, it is!</i>
- It's not. I'll see you later. Bye.
869
00:50:53,840 --> 00:50:54,966
How?
870
00:50:55,480 --> 00:50:57,130
(LOUD SALSA MUSIC)
871
00:51:24,320 --> 00:51:27,529
- Reuby Tuesday, <i>?c?mo est?s?</i>
- Doing all right.
872
00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:36,564
You know what? Actually,
me no <i>est?s</i> too good, Javier.
873
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:41,685
I want you to stay away from Polly.
Find yourself another dance partner.
874
00:51:42,360 --> 00:51:43,691
Why?
875
00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:47,090
Because she and I are a couple.
Yeah, we're dating.
876
00:51:47,200 --> 00:51:50,044
And I'm not going to let
some big-shot salsa king
877
00:51:50,120 --> 00:51:53,090
sweep in, with your mambo moves
and your Erik Estrada look
878
00:51:53,200 --> 00:51:56,921
and take her away. That's happened
before, and it won't again...
879
00:51:57,040 --> 00:51:59,850
- Reuben, I am gay.
- I don't care what you... What?
880
00:51:59,920 --> 00:52:01,524
I'm homosexual.
881
00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:04,729
My boyfriend, Hector, plays
the keyboards in the house band.
882
00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:05,801
Oh.
883
00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:10,611
You think maybe you could give me
some salsa lessons?
884
00:52:11,120 --> 00:52:13,202
(UPBEAT SALSA MUSIC PLAYING)
885
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:39,691
(EXCLAIMS)
886
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:44,168
- You hated it.
- No, I don't. It's just...
887
00:52:44,920 --> 00:52:47,764
It's very graphic
for a children's book.
888
00:52:48,080 --> 00:52:50,401
You know? Like this one...
889
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:55,082
- "The boy with a nub for an arm."
- That one has a moral.
890
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:59,286
To teach kids to be careful when
they're playing with fireworks.
891
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:02,927
Right, and I think it's brilliant,
by the way, seriously.
892
00:53:04,480 --> 00:53:05,686
I mean, you really convey...
893
00:53:05,760 --> 00:53:09,446
the pain and the fear,
and I love the little doggy, too.
894
00:53:10,520 --> 00:53:12,966
But, and I don't mean this
in a bad way...
895
00:53:13,080 --> 00:53:14,127
Right.
896
00:53:15,240 --> 00:53:17,402
...just what were you thinking?
897
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:20,084
(UPBEAT SALSA MUSIC PLAYING)
898
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:37,964
I put all the risks and rewards
into the program,
899
00:53:38,040 --> 00:53:40,202
which helps me finalize my
recommendations...
900
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:42,971
"Leland Van Lew. BASE jumping."
901
00:53:43,480 --> 00:53:47,485
That's supposed to be so much fun!
That should be on the rewards side.
902
00:53:47,640 --> 00:53:51,087
It's one of the most dangerous
activities a human being can do.
903
00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:52,241
- Really?
- Yeah.
904
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:53,731
Have you done it?
905
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,246
Have I parachuted
off the top of a building?
906
00:53:56,320 --> 00:53:57,481
No.
907
00:53:57,800 --> 00:54:00,326
So how do you know what it's like?
908
00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:03,971
I don't.
909
00:54:05,320 --> 00:54:06,845
Interesting.
910
00:54:07,920 --> 00:54:10,002
Would you like some more bulgogi?
911
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:12,600
Sure, thanks. I actually like this.
912
00:54:12,680 --> 00:54:13,966
- POLLY: You do?
- It's good.
913
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:15,725
(REUBEN VOMITING LOUDLY)
914
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:19,170
LELAND: Now you look like
a pro racquetballer.
915
00:54:19,240 --> 00:54:21,481
- How's that shirt fit?
- It's fine.
916
00:54:21,560 --> 00:54:23,483
I thought maybe
we could just sit and talk.
917
00:54:23,560 --> 00:54:25,324
I'm not a big racquetball player...
918
00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:27,448
No worries.
We'll have a few giggles.
919
00:54:27,840 --> 00:54:29,524
(BOTH SCREAMING)
920
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:35,482
I've been running the numbers.
921
00:54:37,480 --> 00:54:40,802
And I got to say, things don't look
good from our end.
922
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:42,331
LELAND: Bollocks!
REUBEN: Jesus!
923
00:54:45,680 --> 00:54:49,810
Please, Leland, I mean,
it's not just the BASE jumping.
924
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:53,771
It's the heli-skiing,
volcano-luging, shark-diving.
925
00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:58,163
Bottom line is, unless you
drastically alter your lifestyle,
926
00:54:58,240 --> 00:55:02,370
- we won't be able to insure you.
- Reuben, I came to you for a reason.
927
00:55:02,880 --> 00:55:06,885
I was told you had more imagination
than other blokes in the big firms.
928
00:55:07,160 --> 00:55:09,925
That you analyze the man
and not just the numbers.
929
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:11,650
I guess I was wrong.
930
00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:14,724
Are you trying to manipulate me?
931
00:55:14,800 --> 00:55:17,849
Of course I am.
But I want to hold on to me company.
932
00:55:23,240 --> 00:55:24,685
I'll tell you what.
933
00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:27,851
I'll be in Nantucket
at the end of the month.
934
00:55:27,920 --> 00:55:30,321
Come up and be my guest
aboard <i>The 'Roo Shooter.</i>
935
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:32,129
- Aboard the what?
- My sailboat.
936
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,851
I'll take you for a sail,
give you a chance to know me.
937
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:38,322
By the end of the weekend,
you'll know what a safe bet I am.
938
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:41,882
You know what?
You're bleeding pretty bad.
939
00:55:41,960 --> 00:55:44,008
I think I've swallowed a tooth.
940
00:55:46,720 --> 00:55:48,768
No. Got it.
941
00:55:50,240 --> 00:55:51,526
Your serve.
942
00:55:53,280 --> 00:55:55,123
REUBEN: So I tell Leland
we can't insure him.
943
00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:57,328
He responds by inviting me
to Nantucket
944
00:55:57,400 --> 00:55:59,164
for some
Death Race Sailing Challenge.
945
00:55:59,240 --> 00:56:02,687
Really? We got to go do that.
I've never been to Nantucket.
946
00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:06,123
- You want to come?
- Is that rude, to invite myself?
947
00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:09,841
It'd be great! Good, you'll actually
commit to something in advance.
948
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:11,968
- Yeah.
- Oh, my God.
949
00:56:12,080 --> 00:56:16,244
Okay, yeah, I am.
I think that would be really fun.
950
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:18,530
- What?
- What are you doing?
951
00:56:18,600 --> 00:56:21,046
I'm going to have some nuts.
952
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:25,045
No. You don't eat mixed nuts
at a bar. Everybody knows that.
953
00:56:25,160 --> 00:56:27,128
What are you talking about?
954
00:56:27,200 --> 00:56:29,965
Okay, let's say, conservatively...
955
00:56:30,720 --> 00:56:33,769
17 people eat these nuts
on a given night. Okay?
956
00:56:33,840 --> 00:56:36,730
If they've been here for two weeks,
we're talking about...
957
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:40,009
238 people who've dipped their
dirty hands into that bowl.
958
00:56:40,080 --> 00:56:42,003
Dirty. Why are their hands dirty?
959
00:56:42,080 --> 00:56:43,764
Only one out of six people
960
00:56:43,840 --> 00:56:45,683
wash hands
when they go to the bathroom.
961
00:56:45,760 --> 00:56:48,366
When you think you're innocently
eating a bar snack,
962
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:50,568
you're ingesting
potentially deadly bacteria
963
00:56:50,640 --> 00:56:52,768
from 39 soil-handed strangers.
964
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:55,047
People wonder why
they get E. coli poisoning
965
00:56:55,120 --> 00:56:56,451
or salmonella or hepatitis.
966
00:56:56,520 --> 00:57:00,047
They should look at the snack bowl
at their local watering hole.
967
00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:04,882
I'm not being neurotic.
It's a hot zone in there.
968
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:11,568
How could you have eaten those?
969
00:57:11,680 --> 00:57:14,286
I made such a compelling argument.
970
00:57:14,360 --> 00:57:16,681
I like to live life on the edge.
971
00:57:17,280 --> 00:57:19,851
POLLY: Thank you.
REUBEN: Yeah, you never know.
972
00:57:32,200 --> 00:57:33,929
You don't have to do this.
973
00:57:34,040 --> 00:57:36,884
I don't care that you don't know
how to dance!
974
00:57:36,960 --> 00:57:39,566
I thought I'd give it one last try.
Hey, Javi.
975
00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:41,642
Hey, Reuben. You ready?
976
00:57:41,720 --> 00:57:42,846
Uh-huh.
977
00:57:42,920 --> 00:57:44,046
POLLY: What's happening?
978
00:57:44,120 --> 00:57:45,929
<i>- ?Fuerte!</i>
- POLLY: What?
979
00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:50,210
What are you doing?
980
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:53,402
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYING)
981
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:19,641
(EXCLAIMING)
982
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,043
(YIPPING)
983
00:59:11,040 --> 00:59:13,520
I don't know where that came from!
984
00:59:13,640 --> 00:59:15,324
POLLY: It was just awesome.
985
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:17,481
Holy shit.
986
00:59:25,160 --> 00:59:27,242
What are you doing here?
987
00:59:30,240 --> 00:59:31,571
I'm back.
988
00:59:34,200 --> 00:59:35,611
Who's this?
989
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:38,800
- Who's this? This is my girlfriend.
- What?
990
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:41,121
- You have a girlfriend?
- I'm not your girlfriend.
991
00:59:41,200 --> 00:59:44,488
I mean, we're just, kind of...
Hi, I'm Polly.
992
00:59:46,320 --> 00:59:48,163
- Lisa.
- POLLY: Right.
993
00:59:55,960 --> 01:00:00,363
You guys probably have a lot
to talk about, so I'll just go.
994
01:00:00,440 --> 01:00:03,284
- REUBEN: I don't want you to go.
- Please, I want to go. Bye, Lisa.
995
01:00:03,360 --> 01:00:05,328
- Nice to meet you.
- REUBEN: I don't want you to go.
996
01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:07,482
You got to talk about it.
997
01:00:08,280 --> 01:00:09,850
I'm just going to go.
998
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:17,806
REUBEN: I don't understand.
999
01:00:17,880 --> 01:00:20,645
I thought you were really happy
with Claude.
1000
01:00:20,760 --> 01:00:24,731
I was, for a few weeks, but all he
talked about was scuba diving.
1001
01:00:24,800 --> 01:00:27,167
- Really?
- I missed you, Reuben.
1002
01:00:27,240 --> 01:00:30,608
I missed you, too, but come on!
What was I supposed to do?
1003
01:00:30,680 --> 01:00:32,967
I moved on. I'm in a relationship.
1004
01:00:33,040 --> 01:00:34,644
- What, with that Polly person?
- Yeah.
1005
01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:36,643
She doesn't call herself
your girlfriend.
1006
01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:39,485
That's... No, she just doesn't like
the phrasing.
1007
01:00:39,560 --> 01:00:42,131
LISA: Okay, then,
let me just ask you this.
1008
01:00:42,240 --> 01:00:46,245
Are you really going to spend
the rest of your life with her?
1009
01:00:46,720 --> 01:00:48,324
I don't know, Lisa.
1010
01:00:48,640 --> 01:00:51,371
Because I'm ready to do that
with you.
1011
01:00:51,480 --> 01:00:54,245
I made a mistake,
and I took you for granted.
1012
01:00:54,400 --> 01:00:58,405
But I promise you that I will
never, ever hurt you again.
1013
01:01:00,880 --> 01:01:02,882
I love you, Reuben.
1014
01:01:09,840 --> 01:01:11,410
REUBEN: You know what?
1015
01:01:12,080 --> 01:01:15,641
I think you should
go stay with your parents. Okay?
1016
01:01:15,720 --> 01:01:18,530
- I've to leave in a week.
- LISA: What? Where are you going?
1017
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:21,809
I'm going into the house
I bought for us. Remember?
1018
01:01:21,880 --> 01:01:24,850
Let's do it together.
Let's go move into our house.
1019
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:28,481
We don't just...
No. We can't just go... I can't...
1020
01:01:31,880 --> 01:01:35,009
I don't even know
what to say right now, okay? So...
1021
01:01:38,320 --> 01:01:39,481
Okay.
1022
01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:45,082
POLLY: <i>If you want to get back together</i>
<i>with her...</i>
1023
01:01:45,160 --> 01:01:48,130
No, I wouldn't be seeing you
if I was planning...
1024
01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:51,409
<i>It's cool. You guys are married.
She came back.</i>
1025
01:01:52,080 --> 01:01:54,367
How's it coming
with Herb Lazare, D.D.S.?
1026
01:01:54,800 --> 01:01:57,610
I haven't even gotten to it.
I'm still working on Van Lew.
1027
01:01:57,680 --> 01:02:00,331
I thought you decided on Van Lew
two weeks ago.
1028
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:02,641
We present to AFLAC on Wednesday.
1029
01:02:02,720 --> 01:02:05,200
- Can you hang on? Hang on.
- POLLY: <i>I have to go.</i>
1030
01:02:05,280 --> 01:02:08,045
- Better not be bonus-hunting on me.
- REUBEN: Bonus-hunting?
1031
01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:11,562
That man's career's on the line.
I owe him a thorough analysis.
1032
01:02:11,640 --> 01:02:12,766
All right.
1033
01:02:12,960 --> 01:02:15,531
I'm going to Barbados with
my mistress for the weekend.
1034
01:02:15,600 --> 01:02:18,331
I want this Van Lew thing settled
by the time I get back.
1035
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,641
I am on it, and I'll make it happen.
1036
01:02:20,760 --> 01:02:22,250
Good things.
1037
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:24,081
(DIAL TONE)
1038
01:02:24,160 --> 01:02:25,241
Damn!
1039
01:02:26,680 --> 01:02:28,091
- LARRY: Hey, pal.
- Hey, Larry.
1040
01:02:28,160 --> 01:02:30,162
Lisa dropped this off for you.
1041
01:02:30,840 --> 01:02:32,080
Oh!
1042
01:02:32,920 --> 01:02:34,046
Thanks.
1043
01:02:40,400 --> 01:02:43,370
(SENTIMENTAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC
PLAYING)
1044
01:02:45,320 --> 01:02:49,928
REUBEN: <i>I met Lisa Kramer, who showed me</i>
<i>an apartment, which I rented...</i>
1045
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:52,731
<i>- just so she'd go out with me.</i>
- LISA: <i>I gave him a good price.</i>
1046
01:02:52,800 --> 01:02:54,882
REUBEN: <i>Not good enough. She's a killer.</i>
1047
01:02:57,840 --> 01:02:59,080
(SIGHING)
1048
01:03:01,040 --> 01:03:03,407
('80S POP SONG)
1049
01:03:06,280 --> 01:03:08,169
I just can't believe she came back.
1050
01:03:08,240 --> 01:03:11,642
Can we just focus for a second?
I'm almost finished.
1051
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:14,769
- What's next?
- Polly's career prospects.
1052
01:03:14,840 --> 01:03:17,889
Risky. She's writing a children's
book where kids get maimed.
1053
01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:22,170
Her lack of career is a positive.
She'd have more time for the kids.
1054
01:03:22,480 --> 01:03:26,405
SANDY: You're skewing the numbers in
her favor. Why are we doing this?
1055
01:03:26,480 --> 01:03:28,403
Because I'm confused.
1056
01:03:28,480 --> 01:03:30,005
My goddamn wife
1057
01:03:30,080 --> 01:03:32,765
shows up on my doorstep
wanting to get back together.
1058
01:03:32,840 --> 01:03:34,729
Polly's freaking out.
1059
01:03:34,800 --> 01:03:37,929
I just want to make sure
I'm making the right decision.
1060
01:03:39,360 --> 01:03:42,125
SANDY: I don't see how putting these
two girls in the Riskmaster
1061
01:03:42,200 --> 01:03:44,248
will help you make up your mind.
1062
01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:50,803
REUBEN: Interesting.
SANDY: What's it say?
1063
01:03:51,440 --> 01:03:52,487
Polly!
1064
01:03:53,120 --> 01:03:54,690
- Polly?
- Yeah.
1065
01:03:54,880 --> 01:03:57,963
No way. Just cut your losses
and get back with Lisa.
1066
01:03:58,040 --> 01:04:01,203
I checked it three times.
It says she's the safer choice.
1067
01:04:01,280 --> 01:04:02,645
Whatever.
1068
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:07,561
By the way, is your health okay?
You're looking thin.
1069
01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:09,847
Polly's been making me
eat ethnic food,
1070
01:04:09,920 --> 01:04:12,366
so I've been throwing up
a lot lately.
1071
01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:13,926
Cool.
1072
01:04:14,000 --> 01:04:15,365
Polly Prince.
1073
01:04:17,280 --> 01:04:18,805
Polly Feffer.
1074
01:04:21,320 --> 01:04:23,243
Polly Prince-Feffer.
1075
01:04:23,640 --> 01:04:26,325
You can't cancel.
You were so excited to go.
1076
01:04:26,480 --> 01:04:27,686
I know, but...
1077
01:04:27,800 --> 01:04:31,043
HOSTESS: We fell in love
with these funny Bolivian mud huts.
1078
01:04:31,120 --> 01:04:32,849
- Hold on.
- So we had our designer
1079
01:04:32,920 --> 01:04:35,082
use a similar color palette
in here.
1080
01:04:35,160 --> 01:04:39,006
Hi. I'm sorry, I'm on the phone.
Would you just please keep it...
1081
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:40,081
(SHUSHING)
1082
01:04:40,680 --> 01:04:43,968
Also, I feel weird going away
for the weekend
1083
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:47,487
<i>- when your wife just came back.</i>
- You're making this such a big deal.
1084
01:04:47,560 --> 01:04:50,484
REUBEN: <i>I told you, I'm not getting back</i>
<i>together with her.</i>
1085
01:04:51,840 --> 01:04:53,365
- So are you coming?
<i>- I'm coming.</i>
1086
01:04:53,840 --> 01:04:55,444
<i>- All right.</i>
- Okay?
1087
01:04:55,800 --> 01:04:56,847
<i>Bye.</i>
1088
01:04:58,080 --> 01:05:00,048
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC PLAYING)
1089
01:05:21,760 --> 01:05:25,287
LELAND: You're good. You're a natural.
POLLY: This is amazing!
1090
01:05:25,560 --> 01:05:28,643
Hey, Leland, are those storm clouds
up ahead?
1091
01:05:30,280 --> 01:05:34,330
No, we might get a light dusting.
Nothing to write home about.
1092
01:05:38,600 --> 01:05:40,045
Are you sure you're all right?
1093
01:05:40,120 --> 01:05:43,090
REUBEN: I'm okay. I don't think I have
my sea legs yet.
1094
01:05:43,160 --> 01:05:45,322
- I'll be out in a sec.
- POLLY: All right.
1095
01:05:45,960 --> 01:05:47,246
Oh, God.
1096
01:05:48,920 --> 01:05:50,922
(RISKMASTER PROGRAM OPENS)
1097
01:05:52,960 --> 01:05:56,328
I know we haven't been seeing each
other long, but I feel like...
1098
01:05:56,400 --> 01:05:58,801
it's time we take things
to the next level
1099
01:05:58,880 --> 01:06:02,282
and I'd like you
to consider moving in with me.
1100
01:06:11,040 --> 01:06:13,168
Why don't we just move in together?
1101
01:06:21,200 --> 01:06:24,044
Oh, yeah, we're going to have
ourselves a tussle.
1102
01:06:24,560 --> 01:06:26,244
(RODOLFO SQUEAKS)
1103
01:06:26,800 --> 01:06:30,725
Rodolfo's in your toiletry kit.
Did you know that?
1104
01:06:31,040 --> 01:06:33,168
Did you pack him, or did you...
1105
01:06:33,240 --> 01:06:34,571
What is this?
1106
01:06:34,640 --> 01:06:38,087
Why am I in your computer
on your Riskmaster thingy?
1107
01:06:38,160 --> 01:06:40,162
Okay, you know what?
I can explain this.
1108
01:06:40,240 --> 01:06:43,005
It's fascinating, actually.
I learned a lot about myself.
1109
01:06:43,080 --> 01:06:46,971
I've learned that I have no career,
I'm flaky, I like ethnic food.
1110
01:06:47,040 --> 01:06:48,724
Would you let me explain?
1111
01:06:48,800 --> 01:06:52,088
Lisa came back, and I've been trying
to figure things out.
1112
01:06:52,160 --> 01:06:56,085
- What are you figuring out?
- Just about us, and our future.
1113
01:06:56,640 --> 01:06:59,689
Future? What are you talking about?
What future?
1114
01:06:59,760 --> 01:07:02,684
Reuben, come on.
This is a fling, you know?
1115
01:07:02,760 --> 01:07:05,240
What, did you think
we'd get married?
1116
01:07:05,320 --> 01:07:06,765
REUBEN: Whoa! Maybe.
1117
01:07:07,640 --> 01:07:09,688
I was gonna ask you
to move in with me first.
1118
01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:13,321
You expect me to move to the
suburbs with you? Are you insane?
1119
01:07:13,960 --> 01:07:16,281
Why is that so crazy?
People do that all the time.
1120
01:07:16,360 --> 01:07:20,206
They have kids, they make plans,
they get married, they buy houses.
1121
01:07:20,280 --> 01:07:22,203
That's you, Reuben. You do that.
1122
01:07:22,280 --> 01:07:24,806
That's what you do.
I don't live my life that way.
1123
01:07:24,880 --> 01:07:27,531
Is your lack of a plan
that different than my plan?
1124
01:07:27,600 --> 01:07:30,809
- I don't have a plan.
- You're on the non-plan plan.
1125
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:34,009
- I am not on a non-plan plan.
- You are, too.
1126
01:07:34,080 --> 01:07:36,606
I've never met anybody
more afraid of commitment.
1127
01:07:36,680 --> 01:07:39,923
You were a senior delegate
at the Model UN, Polly.
1128
01:07:40,000 --> 01:07:41,764
What the hell happened to you?
1129
01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:43,930
(LELAND WHOOPING)
1130
01:07:46,320 --> 01:07:49,369
Come on, you mother!
You can do better than that!
1131
01:07:49,560 --> 01:07:51,449
I've been living my life, okay?
1132
01:07:51,520 --> 01:07:54,410
I've been in good relationships
and in shitty ones.
1133
01:07:54,480 --> 01:07:58,041
And I've moved a lot
and I've been happy and sad
1134
01:07:58,120 --> 01:08:00,168
and lonely and that's what
I've been doing.
1135
01:08:00,240 --> 01:08:02,447
Which is more than I can say
for some freak
1136
01:08:02,520 --> 01:08:05,888
who thinks he'll get Ebola virus
from a bowl of mixed nuts.
1137
01:08:06,000 --> 01:08:08,606
Those nuts have pee on them!
It's common sense.
1138
01:08:08,680 --> 01:08:11,843
Trust me, that is so far
beyond common sense.
1139
01:08:14,720 --> 01:08:16,563
REUBEN: You don't understand
what I grew up with.
1140
01:08:16,640 --> 01:08:18,324
My mother made me
afraid of everything.
1141
01:08:18,400 --> 01:08:21,722
Big deal, Reuben.
My dad had a whole second family.
1142
01:08:21,800 --> 01:08:24,041
- What?
- Yeah, on Long Island.
1143
01:08:24,160 --> 01:08:27,323
A wife and kids
and a golden retriever.
1144
01:08:27,520 --> 01:08:29,204
A second family?
1145
01:08:30,160 --> 01:08:32,481
Whatever. Hey, you know what?
1146
01:08:34,520 --> 01:08:36,568
I'm glad I saw that. I am.
1147
01:08:36,640 --> 01:08:40,804
Because I'm going to make this
really easy for you, Reuben.
1148
01:08:40,880 --> 01:08:43,770
I have no interest...
1149
01:08:43,880 --> 01:08:47,327
in getting married
and moving to the suburbs.
1150
01:08:47,400 --> 01:08:50,006
And obviously that's
really important to you.
1151
01:08:50,080 --> 01:08:52,560
So here's what I think
your new plan should be.
1152
01:08:52,640 --> 01:08:56,122
You should get back together
with Lisa, move into your house
1153
01:08:56,200 --> 01:08:57,850
and move on with your life.
1154
01:08:57,920 --> 01:09:01,242
And I think you guys
will be really happy together.
1155
01:09:01,800 --> 01:09:03,006
Oh, dear Lord.
1156
01:09:04,560 --> 01:09:05,971
(CRASHING)
1157
01:09:09,640 --> 01:09:11,961
REUBEN: You're not making my job
any easier, Leland.
1158
01:09:12,040 --> 01:09:15,522
Come on, Reub.
Weather report said sunny skies.
1159
01:09:18,920 --> 01:09:20,922
(PEACEFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC
PLAYING)
1160
01:09:47,520 --> 01:09:49,409
(ON RECORDING) <i>Hey, it's Polly Prince.</i>
1161
01:09:49,520 --> 01:09:53,002
<i>Leave me a message,
or call back, or not.</i>
1162
01:09:53,080 --> 01:09:55,082
<i>You know, whatever. Okay, bye.</i>
1163
01:09:55,160 --> 01:09:57,606
Hey, Polly, it's me. Listen...
1164
01:09:58,080 --> 01:10:01,687
I'd like to talk to you, because I
feel bad about what happened.
1165
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:04,090
Give me a call on my cell phone.
1166
01:10:11,920 --> 01:10:13,126
(REUBEN SIGHING)
1167
01:10:13,440 --> 01:10:15,522
(PHONE RINGS)
1168
01:10:18,400 --> 01:10:20,641
- Hello?
- LISA: <i>Hi. It's Lisa.</i>
1169
01:10:23,360 --> 01:10:25,169
LISA: <i>So, how's the house?</i>
1170
01:10:25,840 --> 01:10:27,842
The house is great.
1171
01:10:29,040 --> 01:10:31,088
It's big, but, you know, great.
1172
01:10:31,280 --> 01:10:34,727
<i>I can't wait to see it.
Did you get the gift I sent you?</i>
1173
01:10:34,800 --> 01:10:36,529
Yeah, I did. Thanks.
1174
01:10:37,400 --> 01:10:39,209
<i>I really want to see you.</i>
1175
01:10:40,520 --> 01:10:42,329
I don't know, Lisa.
1176
01:10:42,480 --> 01:10:44,130
Let me think about it.
1177
01:10:47,760 --> 01:10:49,808
M.C.: <i>Ladies and gentlemen,</i>
<i>please take your seats.</i>
1178
01:10:49,880 --> 01:10:53,043
<i>The premiere</i> of Jesus Christ
Superstar <i>is about to begin.</i>
1179
01:10:53,120 --> 01:10:55,407
Hey, Reuby Tuesday!
1180
01:10:56,560 --> 01:10:58,210
<i>- ?C?mo est?s?</i>
- What are you doing here?
1181
01:10:58,280 --> 01:11:01,204
What else? Hector's playing
keyboards in the band.
1182
01:11:01,280 --> 01:11:03,362
I didn't figure you a fan
of musical theatre.
1183
01:11:03,440 --> 01:11:06,091
My friend Sandy Lyle is in the show.
1184
01:11:06,480 --> 01:11:08,926
Have you talked to Polly?
1185
01:11:09,880 --> 01:11:13,202
She was upset, bro.
It must've been some kind of fight.
1186
01:11:13,280 --> 01:11:16,170
Yeah, I keep calling her
and she won't pick up the phone.
1187
01:11:16,240 --> 01:11:19,722
I don't know, I was thinking about
maybe dropping by tomorrow.
1188
01:11:19,800 --> 01:11:23,327
It's a bit too late, <i>papi.</i>
She's leaving town in two hours.
1189
01:11:23,720 --> 01:11:24,960
What?
1190
01:11:25,920 --> 01:11:27,001
Why? Where is she going?
1191
01:11:27,080 --> 01:11:29,606
I don't know. She said goodbye.
That's it.
1192
01:11:29,920 --> 01:11:33,083
- Hi, I'm sorry I'm late.
- No, yeah. Hi.
1193
01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:39,090
Hey, Javi, this is Lisa, my wife.
1194
01:11:58,000 --> 01:12:02,050
Her mother told me she was back.
You're doing the right thing here.
1195
01:12:02,120 --> 01:12:05,681
- Relax. I'm not promising anything.
- It's very exciting.
1196
01:12:05,960 --> 01:12:07,928
(PLAYING UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
1197
01:12:10,240 --> 01:12:11,366
(PHONE RINGS)
1198
01:12:12,320 --> 01:12:13,924
STAN: <i>Reuben, Stan. Change of plan.</i>
1199
01:12:14,000 --> 01:12:17,402
<i>The meeting with Van Lew's board
and AFLAC has moved to 4:00.</i>
1200
01:12:17,520 --> 01:12:19,170
4:00? I don't know if I can do that.
1201
01:12:19,240 --> 01:12:21,891
STAN: <i>What's wrong with you?</i>
<i>Get your ass over here!</i>
1202
01:12:21,960 --> 01:12:24,531
SANDY: <i>Good evening, folks.</i>
<i>I'm Sandy Lyle</i>
1203
01:12:24,600 --> 01:12:27,080
<i>and I've got
a very special announcement.</i>
1204
01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:29,323
<i>Please note
that in tonight's performance,</i>
1205
01:12:29,400 --> 01:12:33,371
<i>in addition to playing Judas,
I'll be playing Jesus as well.</i>
1206
01:12:33,440 --> 01:12:35,681
<i>Thank you and enjoy the show.</i>
1207
01:12:35,760 --> 01:12:38,240
DIRECTOR: <i>Sandy. what are you doing?</i>
<i>Wonsuk is playing Jesus.</i>
1208
01:12:38,320 --> 01:12:41,051
SANDY: <i>It's cool. I'll play dual roles.</i>
<i>Give me the crown, Wonsuk.</i>
1209
01:12:41,120 --> 01:12:43,168
WONSUK: <i>Screw you, Sandy.</i>
<i>You're a has-been.</i>
1210
01:12:43,240 --> 01:12:45,607
<i>No one even cares
you were in that stupid movie.</i>
1211
01:12:45,680 --> 01:12:47,284
- Oh, no.
- WONSUK: <i>Oh, shit!</i>
1212
01:12:47,840 --> 01:12:49,080
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
1213
01:12:50,320 --> 01:12:51,765
WONSUK: Judas is biting me!
1214
01:12:54,400 --> 01:12:55,811
What happened in there?
1215
01:12:55,880 --> 01:12:59,965
I'm a professional and I won't put
my reputation on the line
1216
01:13:00,040 --> 01:13:02,088
for a group of freaking amateurs.
1217
01:13:02,160 --> 01:13:05,403
IRVING: It's always the same story
with you, pal.
1218
01:13:07,560 --> 01:13:10,564
You did this one movie
a hundred years ago.
1219
01:13:10,920 --> 01:13:14,481
From then on, you thought you were
better than everybody else.
1220
01:13:14,920 --> 01:13:17,605
Why don't you let go,
move on with your life?
1221
01:13:18,600 --> 01:13:20,728
It's not about
what happened in the past
1222
01:13:20,800 --> 01:13:22,962
or what you think
might happen in the future.
1223
01:13:23,040 --> 01:13:25,520
It's about the ride,
for Christ's sake.
1224
01:13:26,640 --> 01:13:29,246
There's no point in going through
all this crap
1225
01:13:29,320 --> 01:13:31,243
if you don't enjoy the ride.
1226
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:32,726
And you know what?
1227
01:13:32,800 --> 01:13:36,282
When you least expect it,
something great might come along.
1228
01:13:36,360 --> 01:13:38,966
Something better than
you even planned for.
1229
01:13:41,960 --> 01:13:45,043
You were funny as hell
playing those bagpipes, though.
1230
01:13:45,560 --> 01:13:47,722
Did I ever tell you that?
1231
01:13:48,560 --> 01:13:51,928
I don't think I've ever heard you
speak before, Mr. Feffer.
1232
01:13:57,920 --> 01:14:02,323
So, Reuby, are we going to grab
a bite after your work thingamajigy?
1233
01:14:03,120 --> 01:14:04,724
No, Lisa...
1234
01:14:05,800 --> 01:14:08,485
I shouldn't have asked you
to come down here.
1235
01:14:08,720 --> 01:14:11,121
I'm not getting back together
with you.
1236
01:14:11,880 --> 01:14:13,848
What are you talking about?
1237
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:15,525
- Why?
- REUBEN: "Why?"
1238
01:14:17,760 --> 01:14:20,889
You screwed a scuba-diving
instructor on our honeymoon.
1239
01:14:21,560 --> 01:14:26,009
What kind of cold, heartless bitch
would do that to someone they love?
1240
01:14:27,120 --> 01:14:30,920
I'd have to be an idiot to get back
together with you after that.
1241
01:14:31,880 --> 01:14:35,248
And by the way, I destroyed
all your little throw pillows.
1242
01:14:35,400 --> 01:14:38,882
Yeah, because throw pillows suck.
They serve no purpose.
1243
01:14:38,960 --> 01:14:40,769
They're purely decorative.
1244
01:14:44,920 --> 01:14:47,127
SANDY: Dude, that was incredible!
1245
01:14:47,200 --> 01:14:50,044
You told me I should get back
together with her.
1246
01:14:50,640 --> 01:14:53,120
Whatever you do, don't ever take
my advice again.
1247
01:14:53,200 --> 01:14:55,407
Your dad totally put it
in perspective for me.
1248
01:14:55,480 --> 01:14:59,405
I was barely famous back then,
and I'll never be famous again.
1249
01:15:00,080 --> 01:15:02,208
What about your
<i>E! True Hollywood Story?</i>
1250
01:15:02,280 --> 01:15:05,602
The E! channel doesn't even know
we're making this show.
1251
01:15:05,800 --> 01:15:07,290
What do you mean?
1252
01:15:07,680 --> 01:15:09,682
I hired Dustin and Vic myself.
1253
01:15:10,320 --> 01:15:13,847
I was going to try and sell it
to the network when I'm done.
1254
01:15:15,720 --> 01:15:18,769
You're doing an
<i>E! True Hollywood Story</i> on yourself?
1255
01:15:19,400 --> 01:15:23,121
Sandy, that's the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.
1256
01:15:23,200 --> 01:15:25,282
I know. I'm such a loser.
1257
01:15:31,160 --> 01:15:34,448
I need you to do something for me
that's really important
1258
01:15:34,520 --> 01:15:36,921
so promise me, this one time
you won't screw it up.
1259
01:15:37,000 --> 01:15:39,082
Reuben, I'm your wingman.
1260
01:15:39,200 --> 01:15:41,806
Whatever it is,
I will not let you down.
1261
01:15:42,120 --> 01:15:44,691
You're Reuben's proxy?
What the hell does that mean?
1262
01:15:44,760 --> 01:15:46,888
He's dealing with
a personal situation,
1263
01:15:46,960 --> 01:15:50,726
so he asked me to fill in.
Relax, I'm a professional actor.
1264
01:15:50,800 --> 01:15:52,529
They will never know the difference.
1265
01:15:52,600 --> 01:15:56,525
- I can't freaking believe this.
- Quiet. I'm trying to prepare.
1266
01:16:01,360 --> 01:16:02,521
I'm going to vomit.
1267
01:16:13,560 --> 01:16:15,688
I am so sorry
for the delay, folks...
1268
01:16:15,800 --> 01:16:19,202
but one of our senior analysts,
Reuben Feffer,
1269
01:16:19,280 --> 01:16:23,001
had his spleen burst
just a few moments ago and...
1270
01:16:23,160 --> 01:16:25,686
- That's not good. Will he be okay?
- STAN: God willing.
1271
01:16:25,760 --> 01:16:28,889
Be that as it may, we have
Mr. Feffer's associate here...
1272
01:16:28,960 --> 01:16:32,043
Mr. Sanford Lyle,
who's been briefed on the case
1273
01:16:32,120 --> 01:16:34,691
and will present
Reuben's recommendations.
1274
01:16:35,040 --> 01:16:36,610
Thank you, Stanley.
1275
01:16:37,400 --> 01:16:39,607
(CLEARS THROAT NOISILY)
1276
01:16:45,680 --> 01:16:47,523
I just need a little water.
1277
01:17:00,040 --> 01:17:03,010
As you know, this is a highly
complex case.
1278
01:17:05,200 --> 01:17:06,884
Let me see here.
1279
01:17:11,560 --> 01:17:15,690
On the plus side, Leland's
blood pressure is pretty solid.
1280
01:17:16,480 --> 01:17:19,165
And he's at a decent weight.
1281
01:17:19,280 --> 01:17:22,090
And he looks
pretty damn healthy, right?
1282
01:17:22,520 --> 01:17:24,409
I mean, he's a sexy guy.
1283
01:17:24,680 --> 01:17:25,727
Right?
1284
01:17:25,920 --> 01:17:29,527
And he is sexually active
in the community.
1285
01:17:39,040 --> 01:17:40,405
(HONKING)
1286
01:17:45,200 --> 01:17:46,247
Polly!
1287
01:17:46,640 --> 01:17:48,130
JFK, please.
1288
01:18:09,120 --> 01:18:10,645
(RODOLFO SQUEAKS)
1289
01:18:12,160 --> 01:18:14,208
(RODOLFO SQUEALS)
1290
01:18:19,600 --> 01:18:21,807
Let's not bullcrap each other.
1291
01:18:21,880 --> 01:18:25,521
On paper, Van Lew is one of
the riskiest sons of bitches alive.
1292
01:18:25,800 --> 01:18:28,883
But, people,
we cannot sum up a man's life
1293
01:18:28,960 --> 01:18:32,123
with a bunch of numbers
on a computer screen.
1294
01:18:32,560 --> 01:18:35,609
We all need to look
into our hearts and go,
1295
01:18:35,680 --> 01:18:39,651
"Do I think this dude is going
to die in a few years or not?"
1296
01:18:40,200 --> 01:18:45,001
Is Leland here going to fight off
a man with the last name Reaper...
1297
01:18:45,280 --> 01:18:48,966
first name...
Who goes by the last name Reaper...
1298
01:18:49,560 --> 01:18:50,971
first name Grim?
1299
01:18:51,280 --> 01:18:53,521
Or will this BASE-jumping...
1300
01:18:56,320 --> 01:18:58,243
crocodile-wrestling...
1301
01:18:58,640 --> 01:19:00,244
shark-diving...
1302
01:19:00,920 --> 01:19:03,082
volcano-luging...
1303
01:19:03,280 --> 01:19:06,329
bear-fighting, snake-wrangling...
1304
01:19:06,400 --> 01:19:09,643
motocross-racing bastard die?
1305
01:19:10,320 --> 01:19:12,004
And the answer...
1306
01:19:12,160 --> 01:19:14,527
is no, friends.
1307
01:19:14,800 --> 01:19:17,007
Which is why myself...
1308
01:19:17,920 --> 01:19:20,924
Reuben Feffer, Stan...
1309
01:19:22,520 --> 01:19:25,410
and all of us here
at Indurby & Friends,
1310
01:19:25,480 --> 01:19:27,881
are willing to lay our asses
on the line
1311
01:19:27,960 --> 01:19:30,770
and proudly recommend
that Leland Van Lew
1312
01:19:30,840 --> 01:19:33,241
receive $50 million,
1313
01:19:33,320 --> 01:19:36,403
in life and health
and automobile insurance,
1314
01:19:36,720 --> 01:19:40,486
for a duration
of no less than 20 years.
1315
01:19:44,320 --> 01:19:46,368
What do you think, guys?
1316
01:19:48,880 --> 01:19:51,565
Are you that kid
from <i>Crocodile Tears?</i>
1317
01:19:54,720 --> 01:19:57,610
- You're goddamn right I am.
- I thought so.
1318
01:19:57,920 --> 01:20:00,287
Impressive presentation.
He's insured.
1319
01:20:00,760 --> 01:20:03,525
- Congratulations.
- Bloody ripper!
1320
01:20:04,040 --> 01:20:05,530
Love you, son!
1321
01:20:11,400 --> 01:20:12,845
(BEEPING)
1322
01:20:16,240 --> 01:20:17,810
POLLY: Rodolfo, wait!
1323
01:20:18,720 --> 01:20:20,404
I'm so sorry!
1324
01:20:26,520 --> 01:20:30,081
Reuben, it's too late. I have to be
on a plane in 45 minutes.
1325
01:20:30,160 --> 01:20:32,128
I don't think
you really want to leave here.
1326
01:20:32,200 --> 01:20:34,441
You have no idea what I want.
1327
01:20:35,160 --> 01:20:38,004
You left Rodolfo behind.
Does that mean anything?
1328
01:20:38,080 --> 01:20:39,081
(SQUEAKS)
1329
01:20:39,720 --> 01:20:43,088
I made a mistake. I should've
never put you in the Riskmaster.
1330
01:20:43,160 --> 01:20:45,606
Truth is, no matter what happened
on our honeymoon,
1331
01:20:45,680 --> 01:20:48,206
- you're much riskier than Lisa.
- Yes! Right!
1332
01:20:48,320 --> 01:20:50,482
That's why it won't work out
between us.
1333
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:53,643
Reuben, you're a nice,
safe, conventional guy.
1334
01:20:53,720 --> 01:20:55,882
It's not going to work out.
1335
01:20:56,160 --> 01:20:57,764
I don't think
that's who I really am.
1336
01:20:57,840 --> 01:21:00,411
It is. That's okay.
1337
01:21:00,480 --> 01:21:03,290
What do I have to do
to prove it to you?
1338
01:21:05,600 --> 01:21:07,648
POLLY: What are you... Oh, my God.
1339
01:21:08,680 --> 01:21:11,251
Hey, look! Look, I'm eating nuts.
1340
01:21:12,280 --> 01:21:15,329
- What are you doing?
- Those nuts aren't even dirty.
1341
01:21:18,040 --> 01:21:19,041
(GROANS)
1342
01:21:22,960 --> 01:21:26,043
Since we've been together,
I've felt more uncomfortable,
1343
01:21:26,120 --> 01:21:29,681
out of place, embarrassed
and just physically sick
1344
01:21:29,760 --> 01:21:31,285
than in my entire life.
1345
01:21:31,360 --> 01:21:33,328
But I couldn't have
gone through all that...
1346
01:21:33,400 --> 01:21:36,449
I couldn't have thrown up
19 times in 48 days...
1347
01:21:37,840 --> 01:21:40,161
if I wasn't in love with you.
1348
01:21:43,480 --> 01:21:46,086
Maybe you're right.
Maybe this is just a fling.
1349
01:21:46,160 --> 01:21:49,209
But if you get on that plane
and go to Cincinnati or Tanzania
1350
01:21:49,280 --> 01:21:52,523
or wherever, we'll never know
if it could've been more.
1351
01:21:55,240 --> 01:21:56,480
POLLY: Oh, no.
1352
01:22:09,360 --> 01:22:11,362
Please don't eat those.
1353
01:22:12,920 --> 01:22:14,365
POLLY: No, really.
1354
01:22:22,760 --> 01:22:25,081
I don't want you to go away.
1355
01:22:26,160 --> 01:22:30,006
- I'm not going to marry you.
- I don't want to get married.
1356
01:22:30,680 --> 01:22:33,251
I just want to take you to dinner.
1357
01:22:33,480 --> 01:22:35,323
Sometime this week.
1358
01:22:40,840 --> 01:22:42,729
Can I pick the place?
1359
01:22:54,520 --> 01:22:56,648
(UPBEAT CALYPSO MUSIC PLAYING)
1360
01:22:57,840 --> 01:22:59,046
CLAUDE: Solid!
1361
01:23:01,520 --> 01:23:03,409
Excuse me. Hi. Hello.
1362
01:23:03,720 --> 01:23:07,406
I see you two are new to the island.
I want to come have a meet...
1363
01:23:07,480 --> 01:23:09,562
Oh, my stars and stripe, Reuben!
1364
01:23:09,640 --> 01:23:12,120
Oh, my God,
I cannot believe it is you.
1365
01:23:12,200 --> 01:23:14,521
- This is Polly.
- Hi, Polly. I am Claude.
1366
01:23:14,600 --> 01:23:16,250
Wow, hi.
1367
01:23:16,440 --> 01:23:17,930
So, how's it going?
1368
01:23:18,080 --> 01:23:21,971
In truth, it has been a little bit
tough noogies for me.
1369
01:23:22,120 --> 01:23:25,169
Lisa, she broke my heart.
1370
01:23:25,400 --> 01:23:28,370
- I'm sorry to hear that.
- That is life.
1371
01:23:29,440 --> 01:23:31,727
Well, you have to be like the hippo.
1372
01:23:31,840 --> 01:23:34,002
Exactly. Like the hippo.
1373
01:23:34,920 --> 01:23:38,049
So, let me guess.
You are here on honeymoon again?
1374
01:23:38,120 --> 01:23:41,841
- This is your beautiful bride?
- No, we're just hanging out.
1375
01:23:41,920 --> 01:23:45,367
- It's more serious than that.
- I'm just saying we're not married.
1376
01:23:45,440 --> 01:23:47,761
Right. Definitely not married.
But it's possible.
1377
01:23:47,840 --> 01:23:48,966
It is possible.
1378
01:23:49,040 --> 01:23:52,408
We're taking things step by step,
seeing how they work out.
1379
01:23:52,480 --> 01:23:55,609
I don't really understand
what you're talking about...
1380
01:23:55,920 --> 01:23:57,968
but any chance
you're for scuba today?
1381
01:23:58,040 --> 01:24:00,122
You know what,
actually we are for scuba.
1382
01:24:00,200 --> 01:24:02,646
- No way, Jos?!
- Yes way, Jos?!
1383
01:24:02,720 --> 01:24:05,291
But, we're going out with that guy.
1384
01:24:06,760 --> 01:24:09,161
REUBEN: We'll be out there in a minute!
1385
01:24:10,120 --> 01:24:13,283
You know what? As long as
you're for scuba, I am happy.
1386
01:24:13,680 --> 01:24:15,489
Oh, that's sweet.
1387
01:24:15,560 --> 01:24:17,528
So, <i>au revoir,</i> my good friend.
1388
01:24:19,520 --> 01:24:22,000
Thank you for everything, Claude.
1389
01:24:22,480 --> 01:24:25,165
It's good to see you again.
Good-bye, Polly.
1390
01:24:25,600 --> 01:24:28,126
POLLY: Nice to meet you, Claude.
CLAUDE: You, as well.
1391
01:24:30,440 --> 01:24:32,807
- So you're ready?
- Let's do it!
1392
01:24:32,920 --> 01:24:35,161
(UPBEAT LOVE SONG PLAYING)
1393
01:26:44,080 --> 01:26:46,128
(UPBEAT CALYPSO MUSIC PLAYING)
1394
01:29:13,280 --> 01:29:15,408
(UPBEAT SALSA MUSIC)
|